I Never Promised You A Rose Garden
by writergirl2003
Summary: SEQUEL TO A SMILE LIKE YOURS It's been two years. Corny, Amber, and Sophie have been living the life they built together. And just when it should have been perfect, it wasn't.
1. Monopoly

**Wow!!! I didn't know if this day would come, but, alas it has... a sequel to A Smile Like Yours! Don't worry, I'm not finished with Fight Your Way Out, not by a long shot. In fact, I started this story to kind of alternate between a happy place and sad place, if you know what I mean. So when I'm inspired to write happy, I'll come here, and when I want sad, I'll write that story. I think everyone wins. I really, really hope you guys enjoy!**

**Oh yeah, I'm starting each chapter with a set of lyrics, or a quote, or something similiar to that. It's something I've kind of wanted to do for a while, so I'm excited to get the chance. Plus, it will give you guys an idea of what the chapter's going to be like, so...enjoy!!**

* * *

_Well baby I surrender  
To the strawberry ice cream  
Never ever end of all this love  
Well I didn't mean to do it  
But there's no escaping your love_

_"Accidentally in Love"- The Counting Crows_

* * *

"You can't do that!" Sophie looked accusingly up at Amber, her dark eyes narrowing at the blonde woman, "That's cheating, Amber." She pursed her lips together, letting her eyes rake over the crowded board beneath them. Her fingers pointed out to the board. "Look! Your little _horse guy_ landed on Park Place, and I own it, so you have to pay me!" She held out her hand, staring blankly at Amber, who scoffed slightly.

"Sophie!" Amber cried suddenly, turning to Corny for help, but he averted his eyes and began to whistle nonchalantly, "You already got all my money when I landed on Pennsylvania Avenue!" She let her lips twitch into a pout, "You can't just let me slide by this time?"

Amber let her slender fingers rest on the game token that she'd chosen, and Sophie shook her head.

"Nope, sorry. Pay up."

"Sophie," Corny chided her softly, his eyes meeting his daughter's, "Let's cut her some slack, okay?"

Truth be told, they'd been playing for over an hour and the only one of all of them that seemed to care about the outcome was the dark-haired little girl that sat staring at them incredulously.

"But, Daddy, that's cheating!" She glanced at Amber, "It's not fair to cheat!"

He frowned, and watched Amber roll her eyes from the corner of his eye.

"You're right," he nodded coolly, "it's _not_ fair to cheat, but it's also not fair to be so mean to Amber. She's done a lot for you, you know. Maybe it would be nice just to help her out this time, okay?"

Sophie's jaw went slack, and she crossed her arms over her chest for a moment before sighing loudly and rolling her eyes.

"Gee, Daddy, it's just a _game_." She shook her head, her long brown hair swishing against her slender shoulders, "It's not like it's real life or something."

"You're one to talk, Little Miss Spastic," Amber teased her suddenly, and Corny shot them both a glare. "I just want to pass by in peace without being charged for breathing your precious air."

"Well, you can't!" Sophie climbed to her feet suddenly, cocking her head at Amber.

"Well maybe I won't play anymore games with you then," Amber shot back, suddenly defensive, "How do you feel about that?"

"Girls." Corny said the word loudly, firmly, and both of them turned to look at him. He tilted his head, arching an eyebrow at Sophie. "Soph, relax. It's just a game, remember?" He threw her words back at her, and her posture slumped suddenly. She slid back onto the floor and pushed the dice back across the board and into their general direction.

"Fine. You don't have to pay, Amber. It's your turn, Daddy."

She sat with her arms folded across her chest as Corny rolled the dice and let them drop onto the board. He took the tiny steel top hat between his fingers and lifted it to his face, making eye contact with it.

"Hello there, Sir Top Hat." He spoke with a badly mocked British accent, and placed the piece on the board, "Where are we headed today? St James Place?" He slid his token onto the dark purple spot, and looked up. Both Sophie and Amber were watching him dumbly, their mouths slightly agape.

"What?"

Amber shook her head slowly and scooted away from him.

"Jesus, Corny." She tried to keep the corners of her lips from slipping into a smirk, and failed suddenly, letting a soft chuckle escape from deep within her, "You have serious problems."

Sophie giggled slightly across the table from them, and grinned.

"Daddy, really. That's _so_ unbecoming." She shook her head, her dark eyes narrowed.

He looked at her strangely, and then glanced toward Amber.

"Unbecoming, huh? Where did you learn _that_ word, Sophie?" His daughter always had a cornucopia of new vocabulary words to throw at him.

Sophie shrugged nonchalantly, "I don't know, at school."

"I'm sure," he nodded, glancing at Amber, who looked away guiltily.

"Listen, Soph…what do you say we wrap this game up for right now? Maybe we'll play something different in a little bit?" He maintained eye contact with the seven-year-old, and she finally nodded.

"Okay."

Amber let her shoulders sag and leaned back against the couch, crossing her ankles and letting her eyelids close. She groaned, pushing her back against the firm cushion of the couch and crossing her arms behind her head. She giggled softly as she felt Corny's arms moving around her waist, pulling her closer to him.

"Come here, my little Baltic Avenue princess," he snuggled against her neck, and she swatted at him playfully, "You know I'd give you Boardwalk if I could, baby." His lips tickled the base of her neck, and she pushed against him, her cheeks flushing pink.

"I love this little dog," Sophie interrupted their reverie cheerfully, dancing the tiny token around the board, "he's so cute, that's why I chose him!" She glanced curiously at the pieces that Corny had Amber had occupied only moments before. "Why did you pick your pieces, guys?"

"Because I'm so _amazingly_ handsome, and this top hat complements my coat tails," Corny explained, smiling kindly at the child.

"Daddy, don't be arrogant," she chided him softly, and the smile faded from his face. She turned to Amber.

"What about you, Amber?"

She studied the horse and rider in her hand, and then clutched it in her fingers. _Because I like being on top_, she wanted to say, but smirked instead.

"I like horses," she lied innocently, and Sophie nodded acceptingly.

Sophie let her eyes sweep the board, silently reading the names of the streets aloud.

"What's Baltic Avenue?" She wondered curiously, "Is that like Baltimore?"

"Yeah," Amber spoke up suddenly, "You know that part of the city that we always have to lock the doors when we drive through? That's Baltic Avenue."

Sophie's eyes grew wide. "Really?"

"Amber," Corny chided her, "Stop. Don't give that little girl another reason to think she knows everything." He joked the words, smiling softly at her and patting his lap. "Come sit with us, baby."

Sophie moved toward them and slid into the space on the couch between them, the three of them propping their feet up on the coffee table. She slumped against Corny, her fingers reaching out to trace Amber's left hand softly, admiring the diamond ring on her finger.

"It's so pretty," she cooed quietly, "I hope when I get married my husband gives me a diamond ring like this." She turned Amber's hand over, watching the diamond sparkle in the light.

"It's an engagement ring, sweetie, not a wedding ring." Corny reminded her quickly, and Amber narrowed her blue eyes at him. He smiled sweetly at her, and glanced down at Sophie. "And, by the time _you_ get married, diamonds won't be around anymore."

She looked up at him, confused.

"Daddy, I read that diamonds last for millions and millions of years."

"Exactly," he grinned down at her, and she scowled for a moment before smiling up at Amber again.

"Let's talk about the wedding some more," Sophie suggested cheerfully, snuggling against Amber's side. Amber let her arm drape casually around the little girl, into a position that she had become quite accustomed to over the last two years. Before she and Corny had become so involved, and before Sophie had come into her life, Amber had hated children. The way they talked, and looked, and smelled, and dressed. But somehow, Sophie was different than the rest of those children. She carried herself like an adult, presumably because she'd been forced to care for herself more than half of her life.

"And I'm going to be the flower girl?" She asked from her place at Amber's side, nodding into her ribs.

"Yeah," Amber replied softly, "And you can wear a white dress, just like mine, and sprinkle rose petals down the aisle."

"That sounds fun," Sophie replied gently, though she'd been made aware of her flower-girl duties at least hundreds of times by now. "I'll look just like a princess."

"Yeah," Amber sighed against her, though it would be no different from any other day. Corny had _treated_ her like a princess since the day Brenda had pushed her out to him on that studio floor more than two years ago. He worshipped the ground that little girl walked on; so much, in fact, that Amber often had to take charge when Sophie misbehaved, because more often than not, Corny would fall victim to her crooked smile and perfect dimples.

They sat in the silence of the darkened room for a while longer, the three of them resting against each other, and when Sophie began to snore softly between them, Corny chuckled and gathered her into his arms.

"I'll put her to bed," he excused himself and Amber stretched, pulling her feet up beneath her and yawning gently. She closed her eyes and rested against the couch, not making a move to stand up. She knew she had two choices; she could either return to that empty apartment, or stay here again, like she'd been doing for the past few weeks. She knew she could just as easily make her way to the bed that, more often than not, they shared down the hall, the bed that others frowned upon them for sharing because they weren't _legally_ husband and wife yet. Still, she preferred to wait here for him, so that he could take her hand as they moved into his bedroom, he could watch her undress as she slipped into the nightgown that she always kept in the bottom of his dresser drawer, just in case.

She felt his warm arms around her suddenly, his mouth against the base of her neck. His fingers worked on the buttons of her dress, and his lips were against her ear suddenly.

"Baby," he breathed against her, "You think I've earned the right to see _your_ community chest now?"


	2. Stay

**I'm glad you guys are excited to see this back! The lyric for this chapter is from a song called "This Way" by Jewel.**

* * *

_**Say that we'll stay **_

_**Forever this way **_

_**Forever and forever **_

_**That we'll never have to change**_

_

* * *

_"Amber, did you sleep here again last night?" Sophie's eyes went wide as Amber joined them in the kitchen the next morning, a silky robe draped over her shoulders. 

"Why? Am I in trouble if I did?" Amber pretended to be frightened suddenly, sliding her arms around Corny's waist and kissing the base of his neck. He groaned in response, his hands busy with the spatula he was using to flip the pancakes in the pan.

"No," Sophie sighed softly, and Amber moved toward her, running a hand over her dark hair affectionately before joining her at the table. Amber sat straight in her chair, smiling at Corny, and Sophie watched her blush. "Did you guys play more games after I fell asleep last night?" She asked curiously.

She heard Corny chuckle softly, and Amber nodded her head quickly.

"We sure did."

Sophie shook her head.

"Grown up games are boring anyway," she tried to comfort herself with the fact that she hadn't missed out on anything _really _fun.

"Only if you don't know how to play," Amber quipped suddenly, "And me and your daddy are the best at those kinds of games."

"Amber," Corny hushed her suddenly, moving toward the table and slipping a pancake onto Sophie's plate, "Can we not talk about our _games_ in front of my seven-year-old daughter?"

Amber smirked and lifted a glass to her lips, letting the orange juice slip down her throat.

"Daddy, it's okay," Sophie nodded, using her fork to slice her pancake apart, "I know you and Amber play grown-up games." Sophie narrowed her dark eyes at Amber suddenly, "Amber's not very good at using her inside voice."

The words slipped from her mouth with no warning, and the juice in Amber's throat caught. She coughed suddenly, and then spit, spraying an orange mist over the kitchen table. Sophie screamed, pushing away from the table quickly and grinning slightly at Amber. Corny blinked twice, dismayed at the fact that she had just ruined the stack of pancakes it had taken him a long while to perfect.

"Gee, Amber, what happened?" Sophie asked innocently. Amber glared at her, grabbing a napkin to dab at her watery eyes.

"Sophie, that's…" she sputtered for the right words, "it's not nice to eavesdrop."

Sophie blinked innocently.

"I wasn't…eavesdropping. I was just listening." She pursed her lips suddenly, "And I wasn't listening very hard, either. What are you always screaming about, anyway?"

Amber was flustered suddenly, and looked to Corny for support.

"That's enough," he directed his gaze at Sophie suddenly, "Sophie, don't…listen. Amber, don't…well…try not to be so loud." He dropped the dirty pan into the sink, and Amber felt the corners of her lips twitching into a smile.

"I don't…" Sophie was studying the food on her plate suddenly, "I don't think I want to eat these after Amber spit her juice all over them."

"It doesn't matter," Corny sighed, defeated, "Let's just go out for breakfast."

Almost an hour later, they slid into a booth at the same diner Corny had taken Sophie to all those years ago, when she'd shown him the letter Brenda had written to him. Brenda. That was a strange word, a foreign concept to any of them. They hadn't seen or heard from her since the pageant two years ago, and none of them had spoken her name since. Even Sophie had seemed to have forgotten about her, though every time Corny looked at her, he still saw Brenda. Of course, he only saw the good parts; her dark eyes and hair, the rhythm she'd inherited from both of them. Sophie was involved in a dance class that she excelled at, and it made him burst with pride at the thought that she was so interested in dancing. It was, after all, the one thing that had brought his life together.

Sophie slid into the booth beside Amber, and Corny reached across them, pulling three menus to spread out between them. He felt a twinge in his back, and cursed beneath his breath. Amber heard the soft word, and arched a golden eyebrow at him.

"What's wrong?" Her words made Sophie look toward her father, studying him.

"You okay, Daddy?" She echoed Amber's words.

He shot them a grin, flipping the menu open.

"I'm fine," he nodded, "just had a little pain in my back."

Amber's crystal eyes studied him, and he met her gaze slowly.

"You're not getting old on me, are you?" Amber felt her lips turning into a soft, teasing smile, "I'm not looking to marry some old geezer."

He rolled his eyes playfully at her, and Sophie shifted in the booth beside Amber.

"Hey Dad," she said the words slowly, as if she were turning the words over in her head, "What's gonna happen when you get too old to dance on your show anymore?" She studied him with dark, concerned eyes. "Is it gonna get cancelled?"

Amber looked toward Corny, and he swallowed hard. She let her gaze drop to the table suddenly, feeling a twinge in the pit of her stomach. The simple question had made them both worry suddenly, and she knew it. Corny loved that show; it was his livelihood, his youth. She knew that once he realized he was too old or tired to go on hosting it, it would break his heart.

And, as much as she didn't want to admit it, a part of her dreaded that day. It was the day she would have to find a man to take her fiancée's place, doing something that he loved to do so much. It was also the day that he _stopped_ being Corny Collins the host, the man she had fallen in love with, the one that she had always found so deliciously off-limits, and simply became Corny, her soon-to-be husband. She had tried to prepare herself for that day, but even thinking about it made her feel ill.

"Well," he cleared his throat, "You know Amber is in charge of picking a new host, so I _guess_ when that day comes, I'll tell her that I need to be replaced, and we'll find someone to take my place." There was a certain sadness in his eyes at that moment, but he forced it away quickly, smiling at Sophie. "But that's not going to happen for a long time, baby. I'm not an old man, at least not yet."

The smile returned to Sophie's face suddenly, and she nodded.

"Good. I don't want you to get old."

"You're not the only one," Amber sent him a playful smile, and then swallowed, averting her eyes to Sophie. "Come on; let's decide what we want to eat."

She could have claimed that her sudden digression was because she was hungry, because she was impatient, and wanted to eat. In reality, she knew it was because she didn't like this topic of conversation. She didn't want to talk about Corny getting old, leaving the show. She didn't want to have to talk about replacing him with someone younger, more vibrant. That was the day she knew things would change between them, however trivial that might seem. She was too afraid he'd resent her for it, for replacing him. It could cause so many problems between them, and she hated it. Still, she knew it was inevitable.

"Hey," he had noticed her worried gaze, and she shifted her eyes up to look at him, "let's just not think about that, okay? I'm not an old man, Amber. I'm only thirty-three."

She nodded at his words, and Sophie squeaked softly beside her.

"Thirty-three? Daddy, you're _ancient_! Amber's only twenty-four, right?"

Amber let herself laugh softly and nodded, gazing over at Corny. He smiled and sighed softly, folding the menu in his hands.

"Wow, thanks, Soph. You sure know how to make your dad feel good about himself."

Sophie reached across the table suddenly, slipping her fingers into his strong hand.

"It's okay," she nodded seriously at him; "Me and Amber still love you, even if you are _way_ older than both of us."


	3. Crush

Hmm...I have to admit, even I am beginning to get kind of upset with where I see this story going, but don't worry, I'll be good. The song for this chapter is "Collide" by Howie Day.

* * *

**Even the best fall down sometimes  
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme  
Out of the doubt that fills my mind  
I somehow find you and I collide**

* * *

"Hey you," Amber smiled, leaning in to peck Corny's lips as he made his way over to her. He sighed loudly, and let his fingers run up the small of her back. She melted into him, letting her fingers brush over his suit, and rest on his chest. "Great show today."

He furrowed his brows at her, and brushed her hair behind her ears.

"You don't have to suck up. You already got me, remember?" He brushed his finger down her cheek. "Thank you, though."

"I'm not sucking up," she grinned, "I'm technically your boss, remember? I'm just encouraging my favorite host, is all," she tried to keep herself from smiling, but it was hard not to when he stood this close to her. He groaned, and pulled her close.

"You don't have to remind me, I never forget that I'm sleeping with the boss. It's like a fantasy come true," he grinned at her, and she felt her cheeks blushing. She shook her head and glanced down at her watch.

"Oh, babe, it's almost four-thirty. It's time to pick Sophie up from dance class," she reminded him gently, "Want me to go get her?" It was still odd to her sometimes, offering to pick up her step-daughter from various events and classes. It was the one thing she had never wanted to be, in truth. She'd wanted to be a princess, then a dancer, then queen of the world. She'd wanted to be a supreme bitch, a dominant female. She'd wanted to be an entire world. The one thing she'd never wanted to be was a mother, and over the past two years, she'd found it hard not to slip into the assumed role. Although they often fought like sisters, Amber had a new kind of respect, a new sort of love for Sophie. It was unlike anything she'd felt quite before; it was almost a kind of adoration that she just couldn't describe.

"No, I'll get her," Corny sighed, "You stay here and finish up what you need to do. Then when we get back we'll go get dinner." He nodded, kissing her again, his hand moving up to rub the sore spot in his back that he hoped Amber hadn't noticed. "Be back in a few minutes."

She nodded and watched him go, her fingers still clutching the clipboard in her hand. She had a list of things that needed to be done before she left the studio today, and she'd taken her responsibilities as station manager serious over the last few years. Today, though, she didn't feel like doing this, and being here. Still, she knew it was inevitable. She began to scribble notes onto the clipboard, her eyes inadvertently falling upon the modest diamond on her slender finger. She felt her breath catch in her throat again, just as it did each time she remembered that she was actually _engaged_ to Corny; engaged to the man who she had tormented as a teenager, while secretly admiring him from afar. Engaged to the man whose life she had attempted to make a living hell. It was an odd twist of fate, that was for sure. She'd never expected to see him again after she'd left for college after high school. And yet, when she'd come back here, to Baltimore, he was still there. She should have known.

She let her attention slip from her work, and she began to study the ring. It was a smaller diamond than she'd expected to get as a teenager, when she'd been so sure that she'd only marry for money, as her mother had. She'd expected to get a diamond ring as big as her knuckle. And yet, when Corny had slid this one onto her finger that night about six months ago, she'd known that it was perfect. She could remember crying, and kissing his face and that was it. Although she wouldn't admit it to anyone (she still had to uphold her reputation as the cold, unforgiving Von Tussle woman, though she wouldn't even pretend to be half as bad as Velma) it had been the most magical night of her life, and probably the _single_ most important moment so far. Better than all of the Miss Teenage Hairspray pageants she'd won, better than even graduating college. All of those things had been easy compared to taming Corny Collins. Of course, she'd had some help on Sophie's part with that. By the time Corny had asked Amber to be his wife, Sophie had already made him a dedicated, serious, father and boyfriend. Amber had just been on the receiving end, waiting for it.

"Somebody call 911 because I think I'm on fire," she heard the words, and the voice that said them sounded so strangely familiar that she pulled her head up quickly, glaring around the near-empty studio.

"What the…?" She was ready to begin chastising the few remaining crew members for speaking to her in such a manner, until her eyes fell upon the tall, dark-haired man that stood watching her from a few feet away. "Oh, my God."

The dark-haired man broke into a grin and moved toward her quickly, sweeping her into a sudden hug that caused her to lose her breath for a moment. His touch still felt the same, except maybe stronger now. He hadn't held her that way in _years_, before all of the lies had started between them. Before they'd all been transformed into adults when they were only seventeen, it was lifetimes ago.

"Link," she let herself say his name, her head spinning as he stepped back to look at her, "What…what are you doing here?"

"Hey, darlin'," he grinned at her wider now, "Don't I get a hello? I haven't seen you in…what, six years?"

"Hello," she responded dumbly, nodding, "Link, I…what are you doing here?"

"I've come to see how Miss Von Tussle woman takes care of things," he smiled easily at her, "How long have you been station manager?" He pushed a hand through his dark hair. She noticed that he didn't seem to use as much grease as he had when they were in high school, and yet his hair still stayed put.

"Uh…" she found herself stammering, and wasn't completely sure why, "Around two years now."

His blue eyes sparkled. "Two years? I slipped out of here right after graduation…went to California for a little while. Have you ever been to California?"

She shook her head slowly, her mouth still slightly agape from the sudden shock of seeing him.

"No, I went to college in Connecticut," she explained softly, "and then I came back here right after."

Link grinned.

"Amber's a college graduate, huh?" He chuckled softly, "I always wondered if you were going to end up in college." His tongue darted out to wet his lips, "I'm glad you decided to go."

She nodded speechlessly, her blue eyes still watching him. She could feel herself clutching the clipboard still, and released her grip on it slightly. She opened her mouth to speak, but he was first.

"Listen, I'm starving…would you like to join me for dinner?"

His question was so sudden that she barely had time to stutter before she saw Corny and Sophie moving toward her from the studio entrance. Sophie was moving quickly, and carrying a small paper. Corny was lagging slightly behind, and he smiled as his eyes connected with Amber.

"Hey! I made this for you at school! Mrs. Johnson said we-" Sophie stopped in her tracks as she saw the man standing in front of Amber. Her hand fell to her side, and she glanced at Amber before making eye contact with Link. He looked down at her, arching an eyebrow at her before bending down to her level.

"Hey, sweetie," he threw her a wink, "What you got there?"

Sophie swallowed hard, and Amber watched as her face turned a deep pink color. She shrugged her shoulders slightly, and withdrew into herself suddenly.

"A picture," she answered coyly, "I made it in school."

"Can I see?" He spoke to her in such a kind voice that she nodded, and handed the paper to him. Amber looked toward Corny, who had finally neared them, and looked suspiciously in Link's direction. "Who's this for?"

Sophie didn't speak, but pointed a finger at Amber. Amber felt herself smiling, and glanced down at the artwork as Link studied it.

"What a pretty house," he grinned at her, "You did a really swell job with that, honey." He handed the paper back to Sophie, and she clutched it to her chest, sighing softly.

"Thank you."

"Who-" Just as the words had started to leave Corny's mouth, Link turned to him, and their eyes connected. "Link?!" He moved toward him suddenly, clapping him on the back, "What are you doing here?"

"I was just telling Amber I came to observe the fine workings of such a beautiful mind," he grinned sideways at her, then turned back to Corny, "What are you doing here?"

Corny raised his palms upward. "Working...Well, trying to _leave_ work."

Link half-laughed, still watching him.

"No way? You're still running this show, old man?" He grinned, hitting him in the shoulder lightly, "I thought they'd have thrown you out with the trash by now." He grinned.

Corny was taken aback for a moment, and cleared his throat, letting his eyes graze Amber before moving back to Link.

"Well, you can't fix something that isn't broken."

Link nodded easily and then glanced at Amber again.

"So, what do you say? Will you come to dinner with me?" He was grinning now.

She let her jaw go slack, and let her eyes meet Corny's.

"Link, I…you should probably know that I'm-"

"Are we _all_ going to dinner?" Sophie interrupted excitedly, "I'm so hungry!"

Link grinned down at Sophie.

"Cute kid. Who does she belong to?"

"Me," Corny spoke suddenly, and glanced at Amber, "She's my daughter."

Link turned suddenly, his mouth slightly agape.

"You've got a kid?" He was genuinely surprised, and he looked toward Amber, "Did you know this?"

Amber nodded slowly, glaring at him.

"Yes, uh...Corny and I are engaged, Link."

Link's face deadpanned for a moment, and he blinked suddenly.

"Oh!" She watched as his cheeks flushed a soft pink color, and he forced a smile to his lips, "Well, here I am trying to pick up where we left off and you're engaged." He looked toward Sophie suddenly. "Wait a minute…" he bit his lip, "You guys have been busy since I've been gone."

Amber followed his gaze, and then shook her head.

"No! I mean, no, Sophie isn't mine." She tried to ignore the sudden look of confusion that Corny gave her, but felt her cheeks flushing, "Well, she's going to be my step-daughter."

There was an awkward silence between the four of them for a moment, and Corny let his eyes narrow at Link as they stood. Amber felt her face blushing, and met Corny's steely gaze for a moment before clearing her throat.

"So, Link, are you and Tracy still together?"

"Ahh, no." He shuffled his feet suddenly, "Things didn't work out for us. You know how it goes."

Another moment of dead silence, and then Sophie spoke.

"Daddy, if we're not going out to eat, can Link come back to our house and eat dinner?" She batted her eyelashes up at Corny, and lowered her voice suddenly, "_Please, please, please_?"

"Oh," Corny cleared his throat, "Uh, Soph, I'm sure Link has better things to do than come over to our house. Right, Link?"

He smiled suddenly.

"No, actually, I don't. I mean, not if I'm being invited…" he studied them all for a moment.

"Sure," Amber nodded, smiling softly, "you should come over, we'll all have dinner together. It will be nice."

Sophie stood still, her dark eyes watching Link.

"Will you sit next to me, Link? Please?"

"Sure thing, little lady." He nodded at her.

Amber tried to ignore the scowl Corny gave her as they readied to leave. She kept a smile on her face as the three of them slid into the car, and watched Link pull out behind them.

"Amber, is Link your boyfriend?" Sophie asked abruptly from the backseat. Corny's knuckles tightened around the steering wheel, and Amber glared back at her.

"No, Sophie. He _was_ my boyfriend, a long time ago, but he's not anymore." She looked pointedly at Corny, "You can't have a boyfriend and a fiancée."

"Really? Cause I think he still likes you," she made an innocent observation.

"Sophie, that's enough," Corny's voice was firm, and he looked at her through the rearview mirror, "I don't want to hear it."

"I was just saying-" she tried to defend herself, and Amber turned quickly back to look at her.

"Sophie, stop!" Her cheeks were flushed pink, and she sunk back into her seat as Sophie whimpered in the back. Sophie suddenly tossed the paper she had been clutching in her hands up to Amber, and crossed her arms over her chest.

"It's for you," she sneered, "Mrs. Johnson said we were supposed to make pictures for Mother's Day, but I told her I didn't have a _mother_, I had an _Amber_." She pouted as Amber took the picture into her hands.

"Thank you," Amber said the words softly, straightening the picture out and placing it on her lap.

Sophie turned to stare out the window, and could see the reflection of Link's car behind them. She felt herself smiling and her heart began to pound faster. She sighed softly. She was in love.


	4. Roll Call

**Hey everyone!! The song for this chapter is "Breathe Your Name" by Sixpence None the Richer.**

* * *

_You are in my heart  
I can feel your beat  
And you move my mind  
From behind the wheel  
When I lose control  
I can only breathe your name_

* * *

"No kidding?" Link's blue eyes were locked on Corny as he spoke, albeit somewhat reluctantly. "So, she just dumped her off and left?" 

"Hey!" Sophie cried softly, letting her spoon dip into the ice cream she'd dished into bowls for desert. "Nobody dumped me off…I'm not a bag of garbage."

"Aww," Link turned to look at her quickly, chucking her chin with his finger, "I didn't mean it like that, sweetie."

Amber watched as Sophie melted at Link's touch, and found herself smirking involuntarily. She could feel Corny's eyes on her, and raised her stare to meet his. The corners of his lips turned into a slight smile, and she returned the look. Amber let her spoon push into her ice cream, but didn't eat it. She pushed her chair back slightly, and cleared her throat.

"Sophie, help me with the dishes," she requested gently, and Sophie groaned loudly.

"Amber," her name was long and drawn out, "I want to eat my ice cream before it melts!"

Amber pursed her lips and stood, beginning to gather the plates into her arms.

"I'll help," Link volunteered, standing as well, offering Amber a gentle smile as he began to gather plates. She could feel her cheeks warming, and nodded, pushing her way through the dining room and into the kitchen. She let the plates slide into the sink and turned the faucet on, preparing to wash them. She heard Link enter the kitchen behind her. He moved gracefully toward her, sliding the dishes into the sink and stepping back. His hands were shoved into his pockets, and he watched her for a moment.

She stood at the sink, knowing what he was preparing to say. It was inevitable; she could almost predict his exact words.

"Listen, Amber, I'm sorry. About everything."

_Bingo_. She kept her eyes on the dishes, and heard him move behind her.

"I know we didn't exactly end on the best terms. You were a conceited little brat, and I was a stupid kid. I thought I had the world figured out when I was seventeen years old." He sighed softly, and she slowly turned to look at him, "I can't even remember why we hated each other so much." His blue eyes were watching her, and she averted her gaze from him.

Amber wanted to tell him exactly why; she wanted to be the voice of reason in this situation, but suddenly, she couldn't remember either. It had been six long years; high school seemed like lifetimes ago. Her relationship with Link seemed like a different world.

"So, what happened between you and Tracy?" She was desperate for a change of topic; desperate for him to stop watching her with those eyes the color of a swimming pool.

His gaze fell suddenly, and he shuffled his feet.

"She wanted…._deserved_… a lot more than I could give her. She deserved someone who could buy her beautiful things, spend lots of money on her. She wanted to go to college, I wanted to travel." He glanced up at her, seemingly asking her if that was enough of an explanation. "We just had different dreams."

Amber screwed her mouth up.

"Love isn't about what you can _give_ someone, Link."

"Yeah, well, when you're eighteen, it is." Link let his tongue dart out to wet his lips as he grabbed a dish towel and began to dry the dishes Amber placed on the countertop. "How long have you and Corny been together?"

Amber shot a sideways glance at the ring on her finger, and felt the corner of her lips twitch into a smile.

"We've been together for a little over two years," she nodded, "Engaged for about six months."

"Wow," he sighed softly, "I never thought…well, I never thought a few things."

She looked at him curiously.

"I never thought Amber Von Tussle would get married…I never thought Corny Collins would get married…and I sure as hell never thought you'd end up marrying each other."

Amber chuckled softly, and then nodded.

"Yes, it's certainly somewhat surreal."

"I'll have to give him a man-to-man talk. You know, make sure he knows that you were mine first. If he breaks your heart, I'll break his face." Link was grinning.

Amber pulled her lips together, trying to ignore the heat rushing to her face.

"What are you doing back in Baltimore, Link?" She wondered softly, "I mean, this country _must_ have some more exciting places to live than Baltimore."

"It does," he admitted after a short silence, "but Baltimore is my home."

Sophie pushed into the kitchen suddenly, carrying her ice cream bowl to the sink and dropping it in.

"Link, can I show you something?" She looked hesitantly up at him, and he glanced at Amber before laying the towel on the counter.

"Sure," he grinned at her, "as long as Amber doesn't mind that I'm ditching her."

She waved her hand at them, and Sophie scurried out of the kitchen, Link following close behind.

Amber let the water drain, and sighed. She suddenly felt a pair of strong hands on her hips, and warm breath on her neck. She smirked, closing her eyes.

"Ooh, Link…I told you we can't do this while Corny's here." She let her face break into a grin, and turned her head to look at him. Corny's mouth turned into a frown, and he took a step back. She turned, resting her arms on his shoulders. "Oh, it's just you. Well, that's okay, then."

"Very funny," he watched her, "So, you think Link's going to be heading home soon? Cause…it's almost time for Sophie to go to bed, and I..." he kissed her neck, sending goose bumps over her skin, "am kind of ready for bed, too."

She felt her cheeks flush, and tilted her head so that he could taste her skin. She moaned softly, just enough for him to hear it, and then let her eyelids flutter close.

"Baby, I can't just kick him out," she sighed, even though right now she _really_ wanted to.

"I know…but _I_ can. I want you to myself, baby, I don't want to have to share you with anyone," he smirked at her, and she pulled back slightly from him, shaking her head.

"I'm sure he'll go soon," she smirked, "and then you can do _whatever _you want with me." She stepped back, flinging the dish towel over his shoulder. "Now help me dry these dishes."

Close to two hours later, and much too long for Corny's likes, Link had gone. He had bid them all farewell, and Sophie had pouted as she'd watched him drive away. Sophie had requested that Amber put her to bed that night, and she sat curled in the pink blankets on her bed as Amber perched on the edge.

"There," Amber sighed, pushing the covers around her tiny body so that she could barely move, "is that good? You ready for bed now?"

"No," Sophie replied simply, "I need a story first. You really should know that by now, Amber."

"And _you_ should know that I don't do stories," she replied, starting to stand up.

"Amber, come on! All you have to do is make something up and say it. You never _stop_ talking, and now you don't want to start?" Sophie watched her expectantly. Amber sighed.

"Fine! Just lay back and close your eyes." Sophie did as she was told, and Amber watched her. "Okay." She paused for a moment. "Once upon a time, there was a _beautiful_ princess. And her mother was an ugly, horrible witch. Well, one day, this beautiful princess met a gorgeous prince. The beautiful princess was locked in a tower, and she would call her prince's name _all_ night, and finally, he came to rescue her, and he asked her to marry him. The princess said yes, of course, and they lived happily ever after."

Sophie leaned up on her elbows, glaring at Amber.

"Does this _beautiful princess_ happen to be named Amber?" She asked knowingly. Amber smiled.

"Well, as a matter of fact-"

"Because if this _beautiful _princess is named Amber, then you forgot the part about the _gorgeous_ prince's _adorable_ daughter." Sophie smirked. Amber scowled at her suddenly.

"Whatever, he had an adorable daughter. The end." Amber stood and started out of the room.

"And just because the princess had to call the prince's name all night doesn't mean you actually _have_ to do it, Amber."

Amber turned slowly, looking at Sophie again.

"What?"

"I mean," she cleared her throat, "You sleep in the same room with Daddy. You know that he can _hear_ you. You don't have to scream his name when you want to talk to him." She furrowed her eyebrows at Amber. "It's like you're playing Daddy's roll call game, except he's the only one who ever gets his name called, and he's not even the one saying it!"

"Sophie!" Amber hushed her suddenly, her face burning hot, "Have you ever heard of something called privacy?"

"Have you ever heard of something called whispering?" Sophie shot back, "I bet even Daddy gets tired of hearing his name that much. What do you do in there at night, anyway?"

"It _is_ his roll call game," Amber spit the words back at her, "We're rehearsing. Now go to sleep." She flipped the switch and the room descended into darkness. Sophie called for her suddenly.

"Amber!" Amber rolled her eyes into the back of her head and turned, glaring at the child.

"What?"

"You and Link…" she hesitated for a moment, "You used to be in love a long, _long_ time ago, right?" She watched her with huge brown eyes.

Amber felt a lump in her throat suddenly, and chewed on her lip. She wasn't sure if _love_ was the right word for it. They had never been able to get their relationship right, probably because they'd never really _had_ a relationship to begin with. It had been based on lies, and at the time, it had worked for them.

"Something like that," Amber nodded.

"But you love Daddy now, right?" The question came. Amber felt the corners of her lips turning into a smile.

"Right."

"Good," Sophie snuggled into her pillows, "I'm glad."

Amber felt her heart melt a little, and watched Sophie curl into the bed. She suddenly felt guilty, for always being so snappy with Sophie. She was just a little girl, and Amber often forgot that.

"Oh," Amber felt herself saying softly, "Don't worry, Soph. I'm not going to leave you and your daddy."

Sophie propped herself up again, watching her.

"What?"

"I said, I'm not going to leave you and your daddy," Amber replied quietly, still smiling, "I do love him, very much."

Sophie studied her for a moment, and rested against her pillows once again.

"Gee, Amber. I just wanted to know if you and Link were _really_ broken up, because I want to marry him someday." She cleared her throat, closing her eyes, "You don't have to get all mushy."

The smile faded suddenly from Amber's face, and she glared at Sophie.

"Go to sleep." Her voice was back at its normal speaking tone. She shut the door behind her, and headed down the hallway toward Corny's bedroom. She slipped inside, and planted her mouth on his in a deep, affirmative kiss.

"Corny," her voice was breathy, and she whispered the name into his ear as his hands worked over her body. It was time for roll call.


	5. Crash and Burn

Told you I'd have it up soon! Enjoy. The song for this chapter: "The Part Where You Let Go" by Hem.

* * *

_And I don't know  
Is this the part where you let go  
And tumbling out of a window  
Is this the part where you find out  
I'm there for you_

* * *

Amber sighed, collapsing against Corny's chest, breathless and panting. She let her fingers curl into the soft cotton of his white t-shirt, pulling herself up to kiss his lips. He smirked against her kiss, returned it, and let his fingers run up her bare back, tracing her spine. She arched against his touch, and pulled away from the kiss, reaching over to pull a silky robe over her naked body, tying it around her slender waist before snuggling into the space between his arm and chest. 

"You didn't make as much noise as you usually do," his mouth was against her ear, and she glanced at him, "Something wrong?"

"Nope," she shook her head, reaching for his hand and lacing their fingers together, "everything was _amazing_." She pursed her lips together and didn't exactly feel the need to tell him that had only been biting her tongue to save his seven-year-old daughter the trauma of hearing Amber cry his name yet _again_. She smiled up at him, "It's _always_ amazing, baby."

He nodded against her, smiling, and she reclined against him, closing her eyes for a moment as she willed her heartbeat to return to its normal speed. She stretched her long, bare legs out, crossing her feet and moving closer to him.

Amber loved this time of day; early morning, when they woke up before the sun, and had enough time to hold each other, or do _other_ things, before they were forced to get up and prepare for the day. This time between them was so sacred; it was the little bit they got each day that kept them close, and so inexplicably attached to one another.

"So, I was thinking…" she began softly, "that I could maybe rearrange the opening sequence on the show, and I could have some of the council members rework some of the dance…" her voice faded off as she caught the blank look in his eyes. "What do you think?"

"I think," he said after a brief pause, looking down at her, "that I don't really _want_ to talk about the show right now." His lips kissed her neck, grinning tiredly at her, "I mean, between that show, and you, and Sophie, I'm exhausted."

She curled against him, looking up at his face.

"What exhausts you more?" She smirked seductively at him, "Me, or the show?" He curled his lips slightly, watching her, and leaning down to place a gentle kiss on her nose.

"Honestly…" he smirked at her, and she nodded, grinning at him, "the show."

She frowned suddenly, glaring at him before smacking him playfully.

"Okay, I see how it is," she turned her face away from him, and he chuckled lightly. She crossed her arms over her chest, "I guess I'll just have to start trying harder then, won't I?"

He watched her, smiling.

"I was hoping you'd say something like that…"

Two hours and one 'roll call' session later, Amber was standing, now fully clothed, on the side of the stage, watching Corny rehearse. She tapped her foot slightly as he moved, keeping in tow with the beat, and grinning to herself as he _attempted_ to keep up with the kids who were half his age. It wasn't that Corny was lagging behind; in fact, he exerted himself so much that Amber often became jealous of the fact that he poured _so_ much of himself into the show, usually resulting in his exhaustion for that following evening. She knew it wasn't right, to be _jealous_ of his show, especially since _she_ held ultimate control over it; but still, a part of her was.

"Do you think this show will still be around when I get old enough to dance on it?" Sophie asked from her position beside Amber, crossing her arms and watching the rehearsal. Amber glanced down at her suddenly, then shrugged.

"I doubt it, Sophie." It was sad, but unfortunately, it was true. Ratings had been caught in a descent for a few months now, and Amber often worried that it would get cancelled. Though it would be sad for her, she would find other things to do, other shows to focus her attention on, but Corny wouldn't. She knew he would be devastated if and when the show was cancelled, and would take it as a personal attack.

Sophie sighed slightly, her dark eyes never moving from the dancers.

"Well, then, I'll start my own show," she suggested brightly, "and I'll call it The Sophie Collins Show." She nodded affirmatively, "That's what I'll do, and we can film it _right here_, and you can stand here and watch me like you watch Daddy."

"Is that so?" Amber was only half-listening; her eyes were still focused on Corny. She knew she should have been watching the dancers, in order to give them instructions as to what they were doing wrong and why, but she couldn't seem to tear her gaze from him. She felt herself smiling and blushing as she realized that he still _had_ all the moves. Exhausted or not, that man was one _hell_ of a dancer.

"Look at him," she heard his voice, and suddenly, he was standing beside her, as casually as he might have when he still danced on the show, "He's still got it."

She turned slightly, feeling the corners of her lips turn into a smile at the sight of Link.

"I know," her words were quiet, and Sophie pulled around to see who had suddenly come to join them. Upon seeing Link, she flushed and moved slowly, slipping into the space between him and Amber.

"Hi, Link," she greeted him bravely, smiling up at him.

"Well," he bent down to meet her, "Hey there, little lady. It's been a few weeks since I've seen you. How's my favorite girl?"

"Good," she nodded, grinning like an idiot. "How are you?"

"Much better now that I've seen you," he winked playfully at her, and she seemed to melt suddenly. She lost her balance for a moment and Amber caught her by the shoulders, glaring down at her.

"Find your legs, Sophie," she suggested suddenly and Sophie nodded, straightening her knees, still somewhat slumped against Amber.

"So what are you doing here now, Link?" She asked him curiously, her eyes still on Corny, "We haven't seen you for a few weeks."

She saw him watching her from the corner of her eye, grinning crookedly.

"I got bored," he shrugged, "I'm kind of in a dead-end job, and we're closed on holidays, so…" his voice faded, "Today _is_ a holiday right?"

"Memorial Day," Sophie nodded, "That's why I'm here; school is closed, too."

It happened so quickly that Amber had _almost_ begun to look away from Corny; she had _almost_ turned her attention entirely to Link, but nonetheless, she saw it. She watched as Corny's eyes rose to meet hers, if only for a moment. She watched as he took the step, a simple one that he'd done _millions_ of times before successfully. It sent him to the ground in a swift, quick motion, and her heart skipped a beat.

At first, she didn't move, because she wasn't completely sure what was happening. Sophie screamed suddenly, her feet carrying her onto the soundstage, past the council members who had since stopped moving and now stood looking at him worriedly.

"Corny?" Her voice felt so small, and she let her feet carry her out to the stage, her mouth suddenly dry, her face drained of its color. "Corny, are you okay?"

She knelt beside him. He was awake; well, conscious, if that's what she had been worried about. His face was suddenly a deathly pale, his eyes dark and clouded.

"Amber," he tried to grasp for her suddenly, and she held his hand, the lump rising in the back of her throat. Sophie was standing beside him, a horrified look had stained her features, and she was crying softly. "Shit, Amber." He tried to shift suddenly, "_Fuck_!" He growled the word as a white hot pain tore through him, and Amber's eyes widened. Link was beside them suddenly, staring down at him with cornflower blue eyes.

"Corny, you all right?" Amber turned to him suddenly, screaming the words at him.

"Call an ambulance, Link!" She was beyond hysterical, but wouldn't let them see it. She tried to swallow her fear down, and clutched Corny's hand tighter as Link scurried away. "Baby, listen to me. Look at me, are you…" It was stupid to ask _if_ he was in pain; he obviously wasn't writhing on the floor for no reason, "What hurts, Corny?"

"My back, damnit!" he snarled, tensing up suddenly. She recoiled slightly at the harsh edge to his voice, and Sophie took a few steps back, her eyes large and full of tears. Amber swallowed down her fear, holding his hand, whispering to him until they heard the whine of sirens in the distance.

Everything became a blur from there. Sophie cried as the paramedics slid Corny onto a stretcher and into the back of the ambulance, red and white lights swirling over their faces, leaving them all in a haze. Amber held Sophie back, her hands pressing against her chest, pulling her back against her waist. She managed to calm her down enough to get into the car, and followed the ambulance to the hospital, obviously cancelling the show for the day and leaving Link in somewhat of a daze.

Amber and Sophie waited impatiently as they rushed him into the emergency room, and when a doctor finally emerged to tell them that they had set him up in a hospital room, they rushed through the halls to find him.

Amber pushed the door of the room open, Sophie staying close to her side as they entered, neither of them completely sure what sort of condition they would find him in. It was the last thing she felt like doing, but she smiled weakly as she saw him, and the corners of his mouth returned it slightly.

"Hey," her voice was soft, and Sophie stood a few feet from the bed, clutching her hands together and watching him with wide, scared eyes.

"Hi," he whispered to her, and then saw Sophie, offering her the biggest smile he could muster. "Baby, it's okay. Don't be scared, I'll be okay." He patted the side of the hospital bed gently. "Come here, it's okay."

She took a few steps closer to him, trembling slightly. He extended his hand, and she slipped hers into his large palm. They were all silent for a moment, Amber watching them uneasily, and when a man in a white coat came in to talk to them, she sunk into a chair by Corny's bed.

She could barely keep up with the words he said; _spinal disk herniation_, _a tear in the fibrous ring_. What did any of that mean? She could remember asking questions, and feeling somewhat relieved at the doctor's answers.

_It is extremely painful_, he'd told them, _but generally healed itself in approximately six weeks. In about 75 of cases, no surgery was required and patients showed major improvement by a few months._ _It is caused by repetitive movement, stress that is placed on the disk while twisting, or bending_. Well, that explained it all.

Neither of them wanted to leave the hospital that evening, but all of them were exhausted and Corny was having so many things pumped into his system that she wasn't completely sure he even realized they were there at all.

The doctor guaranteed that although he would be in pain, he would be able to be released from the hospital in a few days, and he could spend his time recovering at home. She kissed Corny goodbye and she and Sophie made their way home in silence.

They went through the normal functions of that evening, though there was a heavy silence over them. Sophie didn't ask for a bedtime story, and Amber didn't offer one.

Just after Amber had turned the lights off in her room, Sophie cleared her throat.

"Amber," her voice was soft, pleading, and Amber turned to look at her. "What's going to happen to Daddy's show while he can't even get out of bed?"

Amber narrowed her eyes at her.

"Sophie, really. We need to think about your father getting better before we start to worry about _that_."

Sophie seemed somewhat hurt by the words, and turned her face into her pillow.

Truthfully though, Amber had hated herself for wondering the same thing.


	6. Replacement

I'm glad you guys could see where this was going, I was hoping you'd be able to!!!

Song for this chapter: Back 2 Good by Matchbox 20.

* * *

_Everyone hides shades of shame _

_But looking inside we're the same _

_We're the same  
And we're all grown now _

_But we don't know how  
To get it back to good_

* * *

The first week of Corny's 'recovery', if it could be called that, which Amber didn't believe it could be, was horrible. He had spent the first few days at the hospital, and though she and Sophie had gone to visit him every day for hours, there was a strange silence in the air between them. Then, when visiting hours were over at the hospital, she and Sophie would return home only to face more of that same silence. Amber hated it. She hadn't felt so genuinely unhappy in years; maybe since she'd lived with her mother.

Link stopped by the first night, after they'd come home from the hospital, and offered to take Amber and Sophie out to dinner. Sophie had begged Amber to go, but she had politely declined his offer. Her stomach was in knots over Corny, and the show. Additionally, she wasn't too sure how fond Corny himself would be if he knew she was allowing Link to treat _his_ daughter and fiancée to meals.

The rest of the time, it was pure torture; being alone with Sophie for that long. Their quarreling normally didn't affect either of them, but without Corny there to referee, their smart comments became hurtful and unnecessary. Amber called Sophie a spoiled brat when she refused to take a bath, and when Amber turned the television to a different channel than the one Sophie had requested to watch, she mumbled something about Amber being "meaner than Daddy ever was". When Amber had told her to speak up, Sophie had shouted the words at her before running into her bedroom and slamming the door shut. Sophie hadn't asked Amber to tell her a bedtime story that night, either.

The next few days were the same. Amber had been forced to cancel the show the entire week, if for no other reason than she couldn't concentrate on anything except Corny being home, and well. He'd been allowed to come home on the fourth day, and Amber had helped him into bed, wincing each time he groaned under his breath. He was still the same Corny, still buttering her like bread, joking about the sponge baths he requested from her. She rolled her eyes at him playfully, leaning down to kiss his lips gently before reminding him that the doctor had stressed the 'no physical exertion' part.

It was after Amber had reluctantly put Sophie to bed again that they sat in their bed, Corny propped against his pillows, Amber curled onto her side in the darkness, that she knew she had to say something. She didn't want to, that was for sure. It was a necessity. This was her job, and she had to figure out what exactly needed to be done with Corny's show. They had filled the spot temporarily with a series of after-school specials that had sent the network ratings plummeting, and though it was a priority to care for Corny, this was her job. She couldn't deny it, just as she couldn't deny him.

She turned toward him, her fingers finding his hand in the darkness.

"You sleeping, babe?" She stroked his hand, and he sighed softly.

"No. I think I'll set a new world record; crippled man goes without sleep for…" he paused, "how long do you think I'd have to go without sleep to set a new world record?"

She smiled gently, her fingernails tracing his wrist.

"You're not crippled, honey." She tried to keep her voice light so that he wouldn't be able to hear the uncertainty in her tone, the absolute fear that encompassed her.

"Well, incapacitated, then," he responded, urging her to move closer to him. She did, but only enough to rest her hand gently on his chest, careful not to hurt him. She was quiet for a moment, closed her eyes to gather her strength, and felt herself saying the words.

"Listen, Corny, I need-I mean, _we_ need to talk about the show."

He was silent beside her for a minute.

"I know." He was reluctant, she could tell, and it broke her heart. He knew what was coming. He knew what she was going to say, even before she said it.

"Corny…" she took a deep breath, starting slow, "You're going to be gone for another couple of months. I have to make some kind of decision." She left it out in the open, and hoped that she wouldn't have to actually say the words.

"Okay…" he responded in a few moments, his grasp on her hand relaxing slightly. "Who are you replacing me with?"

She furrowed her eyebrows at him.

"Baby, I'm not replacing you. I-"

"Yes, you are." His voice was quiet, but firm. He blinked a few times in the darkness. "Who is it?"

She was taken aback by his sudden desire to know, and shook her head slightly.

"I…don't know. I wanted to talk to you about it first before-"

"Amber," he said her name so firmly that she looked up at him. "In all technicality, it's your show. Not mine. You have ultimate control over it, you know."

"I know," she admitted softly, "but I didn't want you to get hurt, or upset."

"I'm already hurt," he quipped softly, "you might as well upset me, too."

She turned on her back, her hands splayed across her stomach. She closed her eyes, if only to escape from all of this, and sighed softly in the darkness.

"I was thinking maybe Link," she practically whispered the words to him, failing at swallowing the lump in her throat as she waited for him to respond. There was a long silence between them, and Amber looked toward him to see if he had fallen asleep.

"Link." He said the name after a few minutes, but it came out as more of an external thought.

"Yes," she attempted to cover quickly, "I mean, Corny, he can dance, and sing. The girls love him, even the boys love him. I think he could really help our ratings, and I think he'd do an amazing job."

"It sounds like you're trying to sell a car to me, babe." He groaned the words, and she slid her hand onto his shoulders, massaging his neck muscles lightly. She waited for him to give her his blessing on Link, waited for him to tell her to go ahead and call him, ask if he was interested. When he didn't, she felt the need to broach the topic again.

"He'd just be saving your spot for you, honey." Her fingers worked lightly on the muscles in his neck, "If I don't find someone, you won't even have a show to go back to."

He sighed again, and she held her breath. As much as she liked to pretend she was the same kind of liberated woman that her mother had been, she knew that Corny's opinions and feelings meant too much to her to dismiss them so easily.

"I guess Link would make sense," he said the words, but sounded defeated. Her cheeks were flushed suddenly, and she felt guilty for causing that pain in his voice. She pulled herself into a sitting position and held herself above him for a moment, gently moving in to kiss his lips.

"Just a few months, sweetie. Remember that, okay?" She stroked his cheek gently. "And then you'll be back to work."

And though she didn't even pretend to understand why, she couldn't keep herself from smiling.

She called Link the next day and asked him to meet her at the house. When she asked him to fill the position, he was somewhat surprised, but accepted almost immediately. They agreed to meet early the next morning at the studio, to rehearse the dances with the council members. Amber couldn't be gone for too long, with Corny laid up in bed, but a few hours was just enough time.

Seeing Link do all of Corny's dances, the ones he had made famous, made something inside of her hurt. Corny was right; he _had_ been replaced, no matter how temporary the replacement itself was. The girls on the council were suddenly tripping over themselves to be next to Link, just the way they had when they were council members themselves. It suddenly made Amber blush to remember those days, and suddenly made her realize something; the show needed to be redone. New music, new dance steps. If there was ever any way she was going to erase the guilt of dethroning Corny, she would have to get rid of everything that reminded her of him on the show. When she casually mentioned the idea to him later that night in bed, he became sullen, and withdrawn.

The first day that Link was set to take over Corny's position, Amber awoke feeling somewhat nauseous. She calmed her stomach with some soda crackers and kissed Corny goodbye before watching Sophie climb onto the school bus. She promised Corny to come home for lunch, and rushed to the studio. Rehearsals were early, and went off exactly as planned. She watched as Link swiveled his hips, worked his feet just like he had those years ago, and the girls that were standing in close proximity of him began to tremble. It made her smile; this was going to work, she already knew.

Rehearsals ran longer than expected, and Amber worked through lunch without even realizing it.

Her idea to revamp the show had worked a little too well: it seemed that Amber had already started to forget all about Corny.


	7. Fine

Oh dear. Here comes trouble. The song for this chapter is "Building A Mystery" by Sarah McLachlan.

* * *

_Cause you're working_

_Building a mystery_

_Holding on, holding it in_

_Yeah, you're working_

_Building a mystery_

_And choosing so carefully_

* * *

"Can we get this?" Sophie was perched on the edge of the cart, her heels digging into the bar that held the wheels together. One hand clutched the cart; the other had reached out for a shelf and now held a bottle of chocolate syrup. Amber eyed her selection, and arched an eyebrow. 

"Certainly not. Put it back."

"But we don't have anymore," she groaned, "You and Daddy used it all when you made ice-cream sundaes that one night." She looked up at her expectantly. Amber recalled that night, and felt her lips curling slightly. Yes, that's _exactly_ what they had been using it for, at least as far as anyone needed to know.

"Ugh, fine," she pursed her lips together and Sophie cheered victoriously, dropping the bottle into the cart and digging her fingers into the plastic railing again. Amber pushed the cart forward, her eyes grazing the shelves as she looked for the next item on their list. Corny had absolutely no food at his house, and Amber hadn't had time to go shopping since Link had taken over the show the week before.

She had, in most technicalities, moved in with Corny and Sophie. Though she still had her small apartment on the other side of town, she spent so much time at their house now that there was no point in going home. And though she wasn't a fan of grocery shopping, it needed to be done before they all starved to death, so she had packed Sophie up and brought her along for company.

"Did you know that Suzie Ackerman told me that she's going to marry Link?" Sophie asked suddenly, her eyes dark. "And I told her to wake up from her dream."

Amber was only half-listening as she pulled a bottle of pain medication from the shelf.

"Who is Suzie Ackerman?"

"A girl in my class," she replied smartly, "and she doesn't even know him like I do!"

Amber dropped the bottle into the cart, and looked at her.

"Sophie, she's just saying it to make you mad." And if she was anything at school like she was at home, Sophie talked about Link constantly in class. Amber was somewhat surprised her teacher hadn't sent home a note yet about it.

"Well, it's working," Sophie nodded seriously. Amber pushed the cart another few steps before slowing her speed suddenly, her fingers tightening slightly around the handle, her tongue darting out to wet her lips. Sophie looked at her suspiciously, noticing the way Amber's face had suddenly drained of its color. "Are you okay, Amber?"

Amber felt the heat rising in her cheeks, and swallowed down the lump in her throat. She closed her eyes for a brief moment, clenching her jaw as a wave of nausea swept through her. Sophie watched her silently, her eyes wide.

"Amber?" She asked after another minute, "Are you sick or somethin'?"

"No," Amber said the word quickly, even though it was a lie. "No, I'm fine."

"You don't look fine," she replied, "you look like you're about to throw up."

She _felt_ like she was about to throw up; had been feeling this way since Corny had hurt himself, since there was an unspoken tension between them that they couldn't seem to fix. The waves of nausea came and went, and left a sick feeling in her mouth. She found herself hurrying to the bathroom at the studio sometimes, but hadn't actually vomited. It was getting old, and quick.

"I'm fine, I said," she looked at Sophie, and handed her the list. "Here. Read this to me." Anything to keep Sophie from asking more questions. Sophie reached for the list and began to read it proudly, speaking in a loud voice.

"Pickles," She said first, and then did a double take. "Pickles? Eww! I don't even _like_ pickles!"

"Just read it, Sophie," she glared at her. Sophie opened her mouth to protest, her eyes falling upon something behind Amber. She hopped down from the cart suddenly, dropping the list on the floor and striding over into that general direction. Amber turned, and saw Link, facing away from them, studying a produce display.

Amber chewed on her lip, watching him, and Sophie hopped up on her feet excitedly, waving.

"Link!" She called his name, and he turned, eyeing them suddenly. Sophie waved him over, and Amber turned to look at him, her fingers still wrapped around the handle of the cart.

"Hey guys," he greeted them with an uncertain smile, letting himself look at Amber. "We always seem to run into each other, don't we?"

She dipped her head, nodding slightly, and he furrowed his brows at her.

"Are you okay?" He turned his attention to Amber fully, "You don't look well."

"That's what I told her!" Sophie offered helpfully. Amber frowned at them. Link glanced down at Sophie, smiling at her before glancing back to the blonde woman.

"Seriously, Amber. Are you all right?" His blue eyes were full of concern, and she forced herself to nod.

"Fine." She offered him a forced smile, and then felt another overwhelming wave of nausea. She swallowed hard, and looked toward Sophie. "Soph, take that list and go hunt down some of those items for me."

Sophie started to protest and Amber shot her a look that caused her to bite her tongue. She reluctantly picked the paper up and trudged down the aisle, shooting them both a begrudging glance before disappearing around the corner. Amber looked back up at Link.

"She gets a little flustered when you come around," she confessed.

"I hadn't noticed." He laughed softly, "She's cute, though." They stood quiet for a moment, and he looked toward her again. "Are you still feeling sick?"

She had told Link that she'd been feeling ill, because, truthfully, it had begun to scare her. She didn't want to burden Corny with her problems, not when he had so many of his own. She caught the look on Link's face and began to wonder if she looked _that_ bad. She knew she'd been pale, and hadn't been sleeping much, and it left traces of dark circles beneath her eyes, but she'd always assumed the make-up she used in the morning covered those things up. Apparently, she wasn't applying enough.

"It's just stress," she admitted softly. "I've been worried. You know, about things." She thought for a moment, "And some of the kids in Sophie's school have been sick. Stomach bugs, that sort of thing. I guess I've contracted something."

"Amber the PTA mother," he grinned, "It's still hard to believe."

"Well, I'm not-" she started to protest, and felt the familiar sickness rising in her throat again. Suddenly, she wanted nothing more than to be home, in Corny's bed, and shook her head. "Not even close." She smiled wistfully at him. "I should go, you know, find Sophie."

"Okay. Well. Feel better, then," he smiled softly at her. "See you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," she nodded and hurried around the corner, her stomach threatening to heave again, and she found Sophie quickly, grabbing her hand and tearing to the bathroom in the back of the store. She pushed through the door and slipped onto her knees before the toilet, her stomach churning as the acid slipped up her throat and into the porcelain bowl. Tears stung her eyes, and she wiped them away, her face flushing hot. She took a few minutes to find her strength, after she was sure there was nothing else coming up, and starting to climb to her feet. She heard the bathroom door slip open.

"Amber, you _are_ sick," Sophie said the words affirmatively. Amber stepped out of the stall, her eyes meeting Sophie's.

"I'm _fine_." She glared at her, though she wasn't completely sure her words were true.

By the time they returned home that night, Amber had convinced Sophie not to say anything to Corny about the bathroom incident. He had bigger things to worry about than her stomach bug, and she was desperate not to place any undue stress on him. She had made casual conversation with him in bed that night, still fighting down her nausea, and had mentioned to him that the show was doing well; ratings were high, and Link had slipped effortlessly into fulfilling Corny's duties.

"Is it?" He had asked softly, referring to the show, his hand moving small circles on her back, "Good. So it will be waiting for me when I come back." His words hadn't been a question; they were a statement.

She found herself at the studio the next day, her tired legs holding her as she stood to the side of the stage, watching the rehearsals and nodding approvingly every few minutes. She closed her eyes for a moment, and let her fingers move to the bridge of her nose, attempting to rub away the headache that had been plaguing her for days now. She felt a pair of hands slip around her waist and turned quickly, her eyes wide as she saw him.

"Corny?" She nearly choked, "Babe, what are you doing here? You're not supposed to be out of bed!"

He shrugged slightly, letting his fingers trace down her back.

"I can walk, Amber." He arched an eyebrow at her, "I just can't _exert_ myself." He smiled. "I missed you, so I came down to watch."

She felt herself smirking, and turned, tangling her fingers around his neck gently.

"Came to watch me, or the show?" She smiled slightly at him.

"Both." He smiled, and shifted slightly, slumping.

"Let me get you a chair," she hurried a few feet away, dragging back a seat and motioning for him to sit. He did, and she moved behind him, her fingers running carefully over his shoulders.

She watched from her place behind him as Link finished the routine, the buzzer sounded, and he caught them from the corner of his eye. He looked surprised to see Corny, and hurried over to them.

"Hey, feeling better, old timer?" He joked slightly, and Corny frowned.

"Somewhat," he said the word softly, and Amber gave Link a tight smile, her hands still resting on Corny's shoulders.

"What about you?" Link asked Amber, his eyes studying her face, "Are you still feeling sick?"

Her face flushed immediately, and she stammered as Corny turned his head slightly.

"Uh, yeah, I-I'm fine," she nodded coolly, her fingers curling against Corny's shoulders.

"Good." Link smiled, "You looked awful last night. I was worried." He opened his mouth to speak again, and one of the council members called for him eagerly. He sent Amber a wink and disappeared quickly, leaving Corny and Amber alone.

"You were sick last night?" He asked suspiciously, "And you were with Link?"

"No, I-" her mouth was suddenly dry again, and she had to fight back the bile in her throat, "We ran into him at the grocery store. Ask Sophie, she'll tell you." She said the last sentence as a kind of afterthought, her heart pounding in her chest for a reason that she didn't know. "And I wasn't-I'm not…_sick_," she forced a smile at him, lying quickly. "I'm just…fine."

He sat still in his chair, and she could tell he was biting his tongue. He nodded finally, and that was it. She wasn't necessarily happy about it, but was glad that he let the topic of conversation drop.

It was that same 'fineness' that had Amber sick for the next few days, and eventually what caused her to make a doctor's appointment without Corny's knowledge. It was also what led her to take that urine test, and to wait the three extra days for the results that she quickly learned to dread.

On the fourth day of waiting, she received the news. She had been partially right, she realized immediately. Amber wasn't _sick_ at all; she was pregnant.


	8. Secrets

Let me know that I've done wrong

When I've known this all along

I go around a time or two

Just to waste my time with you

_-"Dirty Little Secret", All American Rejects_

* * *

Truthfully, the idea of it had never even crossed her mind. Even though she wasn't using any sort of birth control, and she and Corny were, or had been, intimate at least several times per week, she had never expected to get pregnant. Despite the fact that she obviously knew Corny was fertile, she simply hadn't been anticipating it, and when it happened, it came as a shock.

She wasn't exactly sure how to react when she had learned the news. She felt like crying, and there was that sick feeling in the pit of her stomach. She threw up soon after, and then let herself sob against the closed toilet lid, wiping the make-up from her eyes before finally finding the strength to pull herself up.

Amber had _no_ idea what to do. She wasn't a _mother_; had never even wanted to be one. It was hard enough looking after Sophie, and she was generally self-sufficient, but a baby needed another person to depend on for _everything_. She couldn't imagine changing diapers, burping, and feedings at three A.M. She couldn't imagine her stomach swelling into the size of a watermelon, and those hideous stretch marks that would inevitably accompany it. And though she knew it was shallow, that _frightened_ her. Her mother had always cursed the day she'd gotten pregnant with Amber, said it made a woman's body go to hell. All Amber had ever had was her body. If she lost that, then what?

She hadn't said anything about it to Corny, because she really had no idea how to. They had never discussed having more children, even after marriage. He had never particularly expressed his want for a baby, and though she hadn't either, they were having one, and she had been completely caught off guard by it. She knew she needed to tell him; he had a right to know, of course, but it made her anxious. He was feeling a little better and could manage to walk around the house; he'd even come down to the studio a few more times after that first time. He usually stood now, on the sidelines, next to her, watching Link like a hawk, though for what particular reason, Amber wasn't completely sure. Still, that meant nothing. It didn't mean that he would be excited, or even happy at the idea of becoming a father again. And with all of the tension that had been between them as of late, she wasn't completely sure that he wouldn't see it as some sort of peace offering. That was all wrong, though. The one thing Amber had never really planned to give him was a baby.

Amber would study her changing reflection in the mirror now, at night, locked in the bathroom. She would slip her robe from her shoulders and let herself gaze at her thin, petite form, though it was already obvious. She could see the soft curve of her belly, expanding just above her abdomen, and knew that was where the baby was. It was living there, in that soft bump of flesh, and it would only continue to grow, until she was literally bursting at the seams. And though she knew she should be happy, she let herself cry in front of that mirror every evening, every time she saw that slight protrusion again.

Things between her and Corny hadn't been particularly easy. Since he had begun to come down to the studio to 'observe', he'd started to regard her with colder eyes, especially when she spoke with Link. She pretended to be fine at work, because she had no choice. She could talk and laugh with Link, and when she returned home, she fell into a somewhat morose state that left both of them slightly uncomfortable. She knew what it was; she knew he was jealous of Link, because he had all of the things that Corny assumed were rightfully _his_. Link had his show, his council members, his popularity. He had his daughter's affections, and from the way he probably saw it, his fiancée's as well. He simply couldn't see that it was all superficial, and that what he really needed to focus on was getting better, so that he would eventually be able to reclaim his possessions. But if anyone knew Corny Collins, they would know that trying to explain anything like that to him was essentially useless. He moved in his own time, and tended to block everyone out when he was in motion.

To make matters worse, Sophie had come down with some kind of stomach bug and had to be kept home from school. While Corny was able to get around, he wasn't quite fast enough to care for a vomiting child, and Amber had been forced to bring her to the studio with her today. She had collapsed backstage, on the couch in Link's dressing room, and if it hadn't been for the occasional cry for water, Amber wouldn't even be completely sure she was still alive.

That same uneasiness between them was why she couldn't concentrate on her work when she was at the studio, and why she often ended up staying later than she had originally anticipated having to. Tonight was no exception. She called Corny, promised him she'd be home before he fell asleep, and returned to the stacks of paperwork that she neglected during the day. She let herself pull her chair up to a desk, her fingers rifling through the papers as she finished the menial tasks, her head suddenly aching from lack of sleep.

"What are you still doing here?" She heard Link behind her, and her shoulders slumped.

"Working late," She looked over her shoulder at him, "What about you?"

"I was getting ready to leave," he took a few steps closer to her, pulling on his suit jacket. "I just checked on Sophie for you, she's sleeping."

"Ah, thanks." Amber offered him a small smile, letting her eyes move back to the papers in front of her. "Well, goodnight, Link."

He stood still for a moment, and finally worked his fingers around the back of a chair, rolling it towards her and letting himself sit in it, next to her at the desk. She looked at him.

"Need help?" He offered quietly. She wanted to say no, but her headache, backache, stomachache…they all said yes. She nodded slightly.

"Thanks, Link." She slid a manila folder in his direction, and her fingers page through the papers, her hands suddenly shaking. He was so close to her that his elbow bumped hers, and he laughed softly.

"Sorry." They worked in silence for a moment, and then he cleared his throat. "So, you're feeling better, then?" She hadn't mentioned anything to him about her 'sickness', and he hadn't asked. Well, at least not until now.

"Uh, yeah." She dipped her head, then opened her mouth to say something else, but he was speaking first.

"Amber." His voice was soft, and she could tell his mouth was dry. He let his hands shuffle the papers before him mindlessly, his eyes watching the table. "I'm sorry. This is all so bizarre."

"What is?" She felt her stomach churning, and forced herself to look at him.

"Just…_this_," as if that explained everything. He thought for a moment. "I didn't expect this to happen."

She felt the corners of her lips turning upwards into a slight smile.

"What? That one day you'd be running Corny's show?"

"No." His voice was serious, and he finally turned to look at her. "That one day I'd be here, with _you_, again."

"Oh," the word escaped almost silently from her mouth. "Yeah, I know." They sat in silence for another moment, and she sniffled. He turned to look at her. "Listen, Link. I need to say this to someone, if only to finalize it for me, and you're the only person I can say it to." She glanced at him, frowning slightly. His hand worked up to rest on the back of her chair, his eyes watching her seriously. "You can't tell _anyone_. You really can't."

He nodded solemnly.

"I won't, I swear."

She let out a soft sigh, and then swallowed hard.

"I'm pregnant." The words felt so strange, slipping from her mouth. She said them quietly enough to where even Link had to strain to hear her, and she looked toward him hurriedly, watching his jaw go slack as her words hit him.

"Oh, wow." He sat back in his chair, his eyes dropping from her face before meeting her again. "Wow. Well that's…that's good, right?"

She pursed her lips together, then forced herself to nod.

"Yeah. It's good." She wasn't sure if she was trying to convince him, or herself.

"Well." He said the word after another moment, "Congratulations, then."

She felt the corners of her lips turning into a frown. She wasn't completely sure what she had been expecting, or wanting, to hear from him, but that wasn't it. She let herself nod.

"Thanks."

She could sense him shifting behind her, and he exhaled softly after a moment.

"It's crazy." His words were quiet, "I used to think that one day, you'd say those words to me, but…you know, it would actually be _my_ baby."

She couldn't help it, but her lips parted, and she turned to look at him.

"Link," she almost laughed his name, "we _never_ got along as kids. Why on earth did you think we'd stay together?"

He shrugged, his cheeks suddenly blushing.

"I don't know. It just made sense, I guess; at least to me. Before Tracy, and all of that."

"I don't think it would have worked," she found herself saying softly to him. "We had too much pride for our own goods. Everything was so superficial."

He let his hand work up the back of her chair again, hesitating before he allowed his fingers to rest gently against the top part of her back. She felt the light touch, stiffening suddenly, her breath catching in her throat. He let his fingers rest on her, stroking her back lightly through the silky material.

"I was stupid," he admitted foolishly, "I should have tried harder to make our relationship work. Then I wouldn't be kicking myself for losing you."

She didn't respond to his words, because she wasn't completely sure what to say. He was so close to her, and her heart was pounding in her chest. She swallowed hard, knowing she should be at home now, with Corny, where she belonged.

He frowned, gently turning her chair, forcing her to look at him.

"I'm too late." He said the words, and she knew what he was asking her. She nodded softly.

"Yeah."

She watched as he clenched his jaw, and slid his hand into hers. He pulled her to her feet, her eyes widening.

"Link, I can't-"

"Shh." He hushed her, letting his eyes graze down her body appreciatively, smiling back at her in defeat. "You love Corny?"

She nodded speechlessly, her heart threatening to pound out of her chest. Sadness flickered in his eyes, and he took a step closer to her.

"Does he make you happy?" He studied her seriously. She nodded again, too taken aback to speak. Link nodded slowly, affirmatively. "Okay. But remember this, Amber."

She let herself meet his eyes now, her body beginning to tremble. He looked to be debating with himself, and let his fingers move up to her jaw line, his thumbs tracing tenderly over her cheeks. Slowly, wordlessly, he brought his face closer to hers. His lips covered hers in an unhurried, delicate kiss. His lips moved over hers, just the way they had when they'd been teenagers. Now, though, something was different. He was no longer demanding, impulsive. His motions were slow and meaningful, and she sucked her breath in. She couldn't move. He pulled away from her slowly, studying her.

"Remember that _I_ loved you first, Amber." His thumbs stroked her lips softly, and she swallowed, feeling a sob build inside of her throat. She wasn't sure why, but she suddenly wanted to cry. Maybe for what they'd had, and lost. Maybe for everything she knew she'd be giving up by marrying Corny, by having his baby.

He hurried away from her, the heels of his shoes clicking as he went. Amber stood trembling, tears burning her eyes, and she wiped them away with the back of her hand. She felt her lips quivering, and clenched her teeth together. She hated Link suddenly, for doing that to her, for thinking he had any right to kiss an engaged, pregnant woman.

She closed her eyes, briefly thanking God that at least he'd done such a foolish thing at an opportune moment, and that he hadn't decided to do that on one of the days Corny had been here. She heard a slight gasp behind her and turned quickly, her eyes brimming with tears again as she saw Sophie watching her, her mouth agape.

"Amber!" She cried her name, tears brimming in her dark eyes. "You said you loved my daddy!"

Amber fumbled.

"I do!" She glanced around helplessly, hurrying over to her, "I do, Sophie."

Sophie recoiled, jumping back as Amber moved closer to her.

"Then why did you just kiss Link?" Her eyes were wide with hurt and fear as she stood gaping up at her.

"I-I didn't," she stammered, "Sophie, I-" She took a quick, shallow breath, "You can't…you can't tell your father about that." She was pleading her now, and fell to her knees quickly, gathering Sophie's hands in her own. "Sophie, listen to me, you _cannot_ tell Corny about this."

A solitary tear rolled down the child's cheek, and she shook her head.

"You don't love my daddy anymore?" She asked the words, her face flushing.

"What?" Amber blanched, "Yes! Of course I love him!"

"Then you can't kiss other boys!" Sophie screamed suddenly, and Amber swallowed hard.

"I know! I know, Sophie, and I'm sorry, but you didn't see everything. I didn't kiss Link, he kissed me." She found herself rationalizing with the child, "I would never do that to your daddy, Soph. You know I wouldn't."

Sophie watched her speechlessly, another tear cascading down her cheek. Amber grasped her arms.

"Sophie, we have to keep this a secret, okay? A secret between us, just us girls, okay?" She was on the verge of tears now, and tried to compose herself. "Because if your daddy ever found out about this, he would be _so_ sad. You don't want him to be sad, do you?"

Sophie shook her head, watching her fearfully.

"Neither do I," Amber whispered back, "So you have to _promise_ me that this is just our secret." She grasped her arms tighter, and Sophie looked away. "Promise me, Sophie."

Sophie blinked, tears spilling from beneath her dark eyelashes, and nodded suddenly.

"Okay." Her voice was so small, and Sophie wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. Sophie broke out of her grasp, letting her feet carry her back to the safe haven of Link's dressing room, and Amber stood, her mouth dry. She rubbed an ache in the small of her back, her own eyes burning with tears.

Her entire future now rested in the hands of a little girl who didn't even know the meaning of the word secret. She suddenly hated herself for putting so much stock in Sophie, for pressuring her into staying quiet.

It wasn't that Amber wasn't going to tell Corny about the kiss. She would…eventually. She just couldn't decide if it should come before or after the words 'I'm pregnant'.


	9. Confrontation

Sniff sniff. Confrontation makes me sad, though you'd never know that, would you?

I promise, the new chapter of Fight Your Way Out won't take THAT long to write. I already know what's going to happen, I just need to, um, write it.

Anyway, enjoy!

* * *

And stranger than your sympathy  
Take these things, so I don't feel  
I'm killing myself from the inside out  
And now my head's been filled with doubt

-"Sympathy"The Goo Goo Dolls

* * *

Corny had begun to make it a ritual; he came to the studio with Amber every day, tagged along like a puppy dog that didn't have a home. It had seemed sweet and loving at first, and now, after almost a week of it, she had begun to resent him for it. He would watch her guardedly throughout the entire show, and it added an extra dose of paranoia to her already overwhelming day. The fact that Link would try and kiss her again, or touch her in some unexpected way, it made her fear that Corny would see, and go completely berserk.

It wasn't that she could _blame_ him; if she had seen another girl touching or kissing Corny, she would probably have ripped her hair out. Still, things were always different from two completely opposite sides. Amber _knew_ what had happened that day, with the kiss. She knew that Link had kissed her, and not the other way around. She knew that it had been soft; a comfort kiss, as she liked to call it. She knew all of those things, and Corny didn't. What she didn't know, however, was why she couldn't stop thinking about it.

By the time they were ready to leave, Amber was dreading the car ride home. Corny had seemed so sullen and withdrawn lately, and from the way he was chewing on his lip, she knew he was ready to explode. She knew before even getting into the car that they were going to fight. She'd seen that look enough on his face; had provoked it out of him as a teenager, and now, here it was again.

They cascaded through the streets of Baltimore, water from the rain that still fell from the sky splashing up and onto their car, drenching the windows and causing Amber to groan.

"Ugly day," Corny murmured from his seat beside her, "How appropriate."

She clenched the steering wheel, looking over at him curiously.

"What do you mean?" She would go down with this ship; she would fight any sort of confrontation until she absolutely could go no further. Her back ached, her feet hurt, and she was tired. The fetus inside of her was draining every last drop of energy that she had.

"I would think you already know." He turned to look at her, and she felt her heart beginning to race. She shook her head, turning into the parking lot of Sophie's dance studio and looking over at him as she put the car in park.

"What are you talking about, Corny?"

He turned his head away from her and Amber sighed, slipping out of the car and into the building. She found Sophie quickly, and the little girl followed her out, ballet shoes toeing the ground silently as she walked.

"What's wrong now?" Sophie asked, furrowing her eyebrows, causing Amber to turn and look at her suspiciously. "Are you and Daddy fighting again?"

"No." Amber answered. At least not yet.

Sophie's eyes went wide suddenly, a small gasp escaping her lips.

"Oh no! Amber, did he find out about you kissing Link?" She asked, a little too loudly for Amber's comfort. The blonde woman narrowed her eyes suddenly, leaning down to Sophie's level and grasping her wrist.

"I didn't _kiss_ him, Sophie," she hissed the words at her, "Remember that. I did not kiss him." She repeated the last sentence slowly, and Sophie took a step back, watching her fearfully.

"Fine. Did Daddy find out about _Link_ kissing you?" She glared up at her, and Amber felt her shoulders slump.

"I don't know. No."

She turned, beginning to walk toward the car, slower this time, and Sophie followed.

"Amber, I think you need to start dancing with Link when he rehearses," she suggested quietly. Amber turned to look at her again, her eyebrows arching in confusion.

"Why?"

"Well," Sophie cleared her throat softly, "I'm not trying to be mean or anything, but, well." She looked around before lowering her voice, "Your belly's getting kind of big." She shot Amber a sympathetic look.

Amber's face flushed, but she rolled her eyes and continued to walk, ignoring the innocent comment.

"Thanks, Soph. That's real nice of you to say."

They slid into the car and Sophie leaned up, placing a quick peck on Corny's cheek. Amber happily listened to Sophie's chattering; anything to distract her from the deadly silence that fell between her and Corny.

"Daddy, do you think Amber's belly is getting kind of big?" Sophie asked from the backseat, and Amber slammed on the brakes at a stop sign, causing the three of them to lurch violently.

"Damnit, Sophie, be quiet!" Amber shot her a glare in the rearview mirror, and she furrowed her brows angrily.

"I told you I'm not being mean!" She defended herself suddenly, "It just is, and there's nothing wrong with that!"

"It's not getting big!" Her voice was getting shrill, and from the corner of her eye, she could see Corny studying the small bump beneath her dress from his position behind her. She swallowed hard. This was _not_ how he was going to find out about this; no way in Hell. She turned around quickly, glaring at the child.

"Sophie, shut your mouth _now_."

"You can't tell me what to do," she shot back quickly, "Daddy, tell her."

"I can _so_ tell you what to do," Amber retorted, "I'm the closest thing to a mother that you've got."

"You are _not_ my mother!" Sophie's voice was shrill.

"Sophie. Amber. Shut. Up." Corny glared at both of them, and they fell into an awkward silence for the rest of the ride home.

As they arrived home and climbed out of the car, Amber saw Sophie slip her fingers into Corny's palm; undoubtedly some kind of unspoken confirmation that she was on _his_ side in this war that was inevitably going to happen between them. That was fine, she told herself as she pushed into the house and started for the kitchen. She had been by herself her entire life; Corny was the first person she'd ever let herself depend on. She could stand up for herself, be alone. It was all the same to her. At least that's what she told herself.

She threw open the freezer door, pulling out a box of frozen TV dinners and letting them fall onto the stove. She didn't hear Corny enter the kitchen behind her, and when she turned, she nearly hit into him, and gasped loudly.

"Shit, Corny, you scared the-"

"Why do you do this, Amber?" He cut her words off, and she watched him cautiously, unconsciously pushing her back against the refrigerator.

"What?" She asked, her eyes narrowing slightly.

"All of this." He looked away from her for a moment, attempting to keep his voice low. "You're just not happy until everyone else around you is miserable, are you?"

His words cut her deep, and she felt her mouth go dry.

"What are you talk-"

"You _know_ what I'm talking about, Amber." His words were sharp, his eyes now locked on her face. "About this stuff with Sophie, you two always arguing. About the show, and Link, and my back."

She was slightly taken aback; sure, arguing with Sophie was something she could do a little less, but she had nothing to do with the other things he had mentioned. Well, that wasn't exactly true, either, but she definitely did _not_ cause problems with them. She couldn't help it that trouble just looked for her.

"I have nothing to do with the show, and Link, and your back," she spat back at him, "It's not like I pushed you down the stairs."

"No, you didn't," he sneered, "but if you hadn't been over there _flirting_ with Link, I wouldn't be like this now. I wouldn't have tripped, and I would be fine."

"Flirting?" Her cheeks flushed, and she glared at him, "I wasn't _flirting_ with anyone!" She swallowed hard, "So, you're saying I'm to blame for what happened to you?"

"Maybe I am." His eyes narrowed at her, "It seems like you're to blame for a lot of bad shit that's happening around here."

She felt her heart pounding in her chest, and glared at him, her blue eyes moist with tears that she was determined not to let slip out.

"You're talking about the show?" She let a small ironic chuckled slip past her lips, "Corny, I am the one who is responsible for the show. If I didn't find somebody to replace you, you wouldn't even _have_ a goddamn show to go back to!"

"So you just had to choose Link, didn't you?" He was livid now, his cheeks flushed red, and she pushed away from him, out of the trap he had created between himself and the refrigerator.

"God, Corny, jealousy does _not_ look good on you." She rolled her eyes at him, "I'm not talking about this," she decided suddenly. The last thing she needed right now was added stress in her life, in her condition, whatever condition she was in, exactly.

"Too bad," he followed her into the living room, where Sophie sat on the couch. As the two of them entered the room, her eyes moved to watch them silently. "I'm not finished talking about it."

Amber turned on him suddenly.

"Well then talk to yourself about it, because that's the only person you're interested in now, anyway!" She glared at him, "You have done _nothing_ for me, or for Sophie, since you've gotten hurt. All you ever do is sit around and feel sorry for yourself, you pathetic asshole." She rolled her eyes, "Oh, is that my fault, too? Did I forget to throw you a pity party?"

"It would be nice to have a little sympathy," he shot back, "but I guess you're too damn busy at that studio with Link to remember me, aren't you? You're such a pain in the ass, Amber."

"Oh Jesus, Corny," she shook her head, "Don't tell _me_ about being busy, you jackass. I have been raising _your _daughter, working over forty hours a week, taking care of you when you couldn't even get out of bed. I've been cooking your dinner, helping Sophie with her homework." She bit her tongue, she wouldn't even mention the fact that she was carrying _his_ child, and felt obnoxiously ill at all times. "So don't tell me that I've been neglecting you. Everything I have been doing is because of _you_."

He clenched his jaw, and let his eyes look at Sophie, who watched them intently.

"Go to your room, Sophie." His voice was deep, serious, and the child scampered off without a sound. He turned his attention back to Amber, lowering his voice and his gaze.

"I don't want her to hear this bullshit." He said the words evenly, and she tried to keep her gaze steady, on him. She was afraid, for a moment, that he might try to hurt her, and thought suddenly of the baby. Should she tell him now? In case something happened? She decided against the thought almost immediately, and let her steely blue eyes gaze back at him. He swallowed hard, and turned away from her for a moment. "I'm going to give you a shadow of a doubt here, Amber." He looked back at her, staring at her face. She could feel her cheeks burning hot, and wondered what would happen if she vomited on the floor right now.

"I want you to tell me what the fuck happened between you and Link."

She swallowed hard, her mouth suddenly coated with a sticky, dry layer or something that she couldn't get rid of.

"N-nothing," she stammered suddenly, looking up at him, "Wait, what do you mean?"

Corny rolled his eyes, sighing loudly before clenching his jaw again.

"You know what I mean. Did you kiss him?"

The words came as such a total shock that she found herself stumbling backwards, and had to catch herself. The flush that ran through her face at that moment surely led him to believe that anything she said from this point on was a total lie.

"No!" She shot back suddenly, her voice shrill. "Who told you that?"

"It doesn't matter who told me," he glared at her, "What the hell does that matter, Amber?"

"Because it's not true!" She shot back, "We didn't-I mean, I didn't do...nothing happened!"

"Really?" He sneered at her, "Because that's not what I've heard. I tried to confront Link about it, but that little chicken shit wouldn't talk to me." She tried to find the Corny she knew in those eyes; the one that had always joked with her, the one she had grown up around. All she saw was the anger, and suddenly, she knew that she was the one responsible for that.

"Sophie." She said her name quietly, indicting herself without even realizing it. "She told you, didn't she?"

"No, she didn't." His words had a sharp edge to them, "And don't try to make this about her, Amber. You are _not_ going to blame her for all of your stupid ass, thoughtless decisions."

She felt the tears burning her eyes, and her jaw beginning to tremble. She balled her fingers into tight fists at her side, her eyes watching him.

"Don't call me stupid, you moron!" She yelled the words back at him, and he caught her by the wrist as she turned on her heels to go.

"You _are_ stupid, Amber. If you are willing to give up everything we have because some goddamn ex-boyfriend of yours swoops back into town, then you are an idiot."

"I'm not…I didn't…" she groaned loudly, throwing her head back, the tears threatening to spill down her cheeks, "I don't want that!"

"Then tell me the truth." His words were firm, unwavering. "Did you kiss him?"

"No!" She cried again, louder this time, "He did, Corny." She admitted the last words softly, looking away from him. "He kissed me, okay?"

Corny's eyes flashed dark, and he furrowed his eyebrows at her.

"Okay?" He asked, shaking his head, "No, it's not okay. Did you tell him that; that it wasn't okay?"

"Yes, of course," she whispered, even though she couldn't remember saying much of anything to him about it. They had avoided speaking about it since it had happened, and she had been too shocked at the time to say anything, much less to reprimand him for it.

"Did you?" He asked again, almost disbelieving. "Did you like it?"

"What?" She cried the word, looking up at him incredulously. "No, of course not! I didn't-it wasn't…" she stopped, dropping her head. "We're just friends. It was just a friendly kiss, Corny." Even saying the words, she felt stupid.

He watched her for a moment, and she blinked back the tears, attempting to swallow down the guilt he had thrust upon her.

"Yeah." He snorted softly, his eyes still watching her. "Friends, my ass."

She pursed her lips together, watching him, pleading with him. She was tempted to drop to her knees before him, to beg him to forgive her for all of the mistakes she'd made recently. Another part of her suddenly wanted to tell him that she was pregnant; it was a desperate attempt to save their relationship, but she couldn't do that. Not right now.

"Well next time he starts to give you a 'friendly' kiss, you tell him that your _fiancée_ will kick his ass. Do you understand me?" He was watching her, and she could do little more than nod. He turned on her suddenly, making his way slowly towards his bedroom. She stood watching him dumbly, his hand falling on the knob before opening the door.

"Go back to your apartment tonight, Amber."

It was the first time he had ever said those words to her.


	10. Mother

_If I could find out how  
To make you listen now  
Because I'm starving for you here  
With my undying love_

_"Breathe"- Paramore_

* * *

Amber herself knew that she had done many, many stupid things in her life. She had always been the biggest bitch in high school, had never let herself feel guilty for any of the horrible things she'd ever done. Though, as she lay alone in the bed in her apartment, the blankets twisted around her legs from tossing and turning, she suddenly hated herself.

Corny was a good man. Sure, he'd made her miserable as a teenager, and he'd made some rather irresponsible decisions years ago, but everyone did. He'd taken responsibility for his actions, and, for the past two years, had been nothing but supportive and loving to Amber. She knew he deserved better than to be lied to, especially by his fiancée. He deserved better than another man _kissing_ his fiancée, and sure as hell deserved better than the fact that she couldn't stop thinking about that kiss.

It was so bizarre, to feel his lips on her after more than six years. His kiss was soft, somewhat sloppy, like it had always been. She'd always hated kissing him all those years ago; it was like he wasn't completely sure what to do with his tongue, and always seemed to search aimlessly for her own. She hated the fact that she could still feel his kiss, _despised_ the idea that her lips still trembled when she thought about it.

It wasn't that she had _liked_ the kiss; that wasn't necessarily what it was. There was just something _different_ about his lips, something different from Corny. It made her feel a different kind of beautiful; when Link had kissed her. It made her realize that she was still a young, gorgeous woman, and not just to her fiancée. It made her feel like she was seventeen years old again, spinning and twirling on Corny's show, flirting with him but making no real commitment to him at all. Not almost twenty-five, not engaged, and certainly not pregnant.

She wanted to marry Corny; there was no doubt in her mind about that. It simply scared her, when she thought about it. She was only twenty-four, and had spent the better part of her teenage years following her mother's laws so religiously that she'd barely had a chance to date anyone but Link. She'd had a few flings in college, but they'd been nothing serious, and the thought that Corny would, in all actuality, be the last person she ever kissed, scared her.

She hated the way her thoughts sounded, even to her. She loved Corny desperately; loved him like she'd never loved another human being in her life. She wanted to feel his lips on her, his fingers on her skin. She wanted him to hold her, make love to her, kiss her for the rest of their lives. She _wanted_ to be with Corny, no matter how much he thought anything else. And above all, that was all that really mattered. That was exactly why she decided that tomorrow _had_ to be the day she told him about her pregnancy. Despite the fact that she still hadn't really clarified her own feelings about it, and the fact that he might get mad at her for keeping _that_ from him, too, she needed to do it. It was the only thing she could think of that would give her a chance of salvaging the relationship that she had single-handedly fall apart.

She found herself on his doorstep close to an hour later, feeling abnormally jittery as she climbed the stairs. Her fingers moved to the doorknob and she turned it, but it didn't budge. Instead of reaching into her purse for the key, she let a manicured nail press the doorbell and waited outside, frowning to herself.

This was insane, she knew. She'd been practically living here for almost a year, and now she had been reduced to a strange houseguest. She felt her cheeks burning as the door opened, and Sophie looked up at her, brows furrowed and fists rubbing the sleep from her eyes, her small robe knotted around her waist.

"Amber?" She looked genuinely confused, though Amber couldn't be completely sure that wasn't because she was still half-asleep. She blinked twice, turning away from the door and trudging back through the living room, leaving Amber to open the screen door herself and slip in. Sophie had collapsed onto the couch, her cheek resting casually on the cushion as she watched a cartoon on television. Amber took a few steps inside, feeling unusually stupid for being so nervous. The fight had been just last night; she'd only been gone from this place for a few hours, and still, it felt different here.

"Where's your daddy, Sophie?" Amber glanced at her, and Sophie propped herself up on one elbow, watching her.

"Shower," she answered softly, then let her eyes trace over her. "You didn't stay here with Daddy last night, did you?"

Amber swallowed hard, and shook her head slightly.

"No."

Sophie frowned, and slowly pulled herself into a sitting position, her dark eyes still focused on the blonde woman.

"I didn't tell him, Amber." Her voice was solemn; so eerily adult-like that it sent chills up Amber's spine. "About you and Link, I mean." The corners of her lips turned into a frown, "I promised you I wouldn't."

"Okay," she felt the word slipping from her lips, barely loud enough for the child to hear, "I believe you."

It wasn't hard to believe that one of the current council members had seen them, and spread the news like wildfire. There was barely ever a time when she found herself completely alone in the studio, and there were lots of places for someone to hide. She pursed her lips, and Sophie turned her attention back to the television.

Amber stood for another moment, and finally heard the shower shut off. She heard the bathroom door open, and he entered his bedroom. She gave Corny a moment before moving to the door, rapping it softly with her fingernails. She let her hand move to the knob, holding her breath for a moment. When it turned in her palm, she sighed softly and pushed it open, slipping inside.

He stood with his back to the door, wearing a pair of lounge pants and a plain cotton t-shirt, his hair still damp from the shower. She fiddled with her fingers quietly for a moment, watching him.

"Corny, I need to talk to you." Her voice was soft, apologetic. Her lower lip jutted out, and she thought for a moment that she might cry. It was slightly ridiculous, but her hormones were in sudden overdrive. She placed her fingers on her hips, watching him. "Look at me, please?"

He turned slowly, his eyes brushing over hers, and she smiled softly at him.

"Hi," she whispered somewhat foolishly, her cheeks pink with humility.

"Hi." His voice was dry, monotone. He watched her, and she took a step closer to him, swallowing hard.

"I'm sorry," she spoke softly, "for everything. I wouldn't-I mean, I didn't…" her voice faded, and her eyes dropped, brushing the floor before looking back up at him. "I love you. You know that, don't you?"

He set his face, clenching his jaw. He looked so much like a stubborn child at that moment that she had to make an effort not to smile. He looked prepared to speak, and then sighed softly, letting his tongue dart out to wet his lips before rocking back on his heels silently.

"Well, I do." She frowned, slightly discouraged by his silence. "And you know it's not easy for me to apologize, Corny."

"I can't help it, Amber," he sighed dejectedly, "I can't stop thinking about it. Why would you let him kiss you?"

"I didn't let him!" She suddenly felt defensive, "It just…I was in shock, Corny. I wasn't expecting it to happen, and by the time I _realized_ what was going on, it was over!"

He shook his head, swallowing hard. He looked at her, her blue eyes brimming with tears. He sighed finally, dropping his head.

"It's not that I don't believe you." His voice was low, "You haven't lied to me since you were seventeen," he finally let a hand reach up to brush a strand of hair from her face, "it's just that Link is…" he was quiet for a moment, "Link is everything I'm not, Amber."

She furrowed her eyebrows, watching him.

"That's exactly why I love you." She knew she had to speak suddenly; he was faltering, and she could see it in his eyes. "Corny, I don't _want_ Link. I don't want him to be the one I come home to, the one that kisses me goodnight." She frowned suddenly, guilty tears forming in her eyes, "I don't want him to be the one that loves me, Corny. I want it to be you. And I don't care _how_ Link feels about me, because I love _you_, not Link."

She pressed herself onto her tiptoes, placing a gentle kiss on his cheek. She rocked back on her heels, looking up at him worriedly.

"Do you still love me?" She knew the question was ridiculously absurd, and as stupid as she felt asking it, part of her dreaded his answer. She had never known unconditional love; Velma had merely tolerated her when it was appropriate to do so. She felt tears welling in her eyes, and he frowned slightly, letting his hands move to her face, his thumbs stroking her cheek.

"I guess so," he sighed, smiling softly, then teased, "You're too pretty to stay mad at, anyway." He pulled her closer to him gently. She sniffed, letting her fingers work around him, resting on his back as he held her to his chest. "And I'm sorry, too. For all of those things I said. It's not your fault, Amber, none of this is. I was just upset."

She sniffled again, nuzzling into his chest. Just for right now, she would let herself pretend that was true. She pulled back slowly and smiled softly at him, taking his hand in hers, motioning for him to sit on the bed with her. She stroked the back of his hand with her fingers, her heart suddenly pounding in her chest.

"There's something else I need to tell you." Her voice was soft and low, because she wasn't completely sure how to deliver the news. She'd never _thought_ about this, growing up. She'd never envisioned what it would be like to tell her husband that they were expecting a child because she'd never planned on getting married, and certainly not on having a baby.

His face tensed slightly at her words, and his eyes watched her. She let her top teeth chew on her bottom lip for a moment, and finally let her jaw go slack.

"Corny, I'm-"

The words suddenly stuck in her mouth. She tried to find them, tried to work her tongue around them, but she couldn't. Her heart was racing, and her cheeks felt flushed. She tasted the bitter dryness of steel in her mouth, and felt the familiar churning in her stomach. She bolted from the room suddenly, barrowing down the hall, barely making it to the bathroom in time before the bile pushed up her throat, and into the toilet bowl. She felt hot tears burning her eyes and wiped them away with the back of her hands, her stomach muscles heaving as she emptied her belly.

She groaned slightly, pulling the lid down and slumping over it, letting her fingers work to flush the toilet as she felt his fingers on her back, tracing down her spine.

"You're sick again?" Sophie was the one to ask the question, and Corny looked back at her, bending slightly to let his fingers massage Amber's shoulders slightly.

"No," she moaned the words, "not sick."

She felt both pairs of eyes watching her; drilling into the back of her skull, and let her head fall against the toilet lid, her forehead resting on the cool plastic.

"Not sick?" Corny asked quietly, his fingers brushing lightly through her hair, "You look pretty sick to me."

"No," she sighed, pathetically, not even bothering to raise her head, "Not sick. Pregnant."

There was a deadly silence between the three of them suddenly, and Amber sucked her breath in, tears still burning her eyes. She remained slumped in her position, and heard Sophie squeak suddenly.

"You mean, you're having a baby?" She glanced up at Corny for confirmation, but he simply regarded her with wide, uncertain eyes.

Amber nodded silently, still not raising her head. Corny cleared his throat after a moment, and turned to Sophie, speaking to her in a soft voice.

"Soph, go watch TV for a minute, let me talk to Amber." She turned away suddenly and hurried into the living room. Corny stood silently behind Amber, before slowly allowing himself to sink onto the floor next to her. It was hard, with the still throbbing pain in his back, but he positioned himself against the claw-footed tub and the toilet, letting his arms reach around her.

She finally pulled her head up, studying him with eyes of crystal blue, using the back of her hand to wipe the smeared mascara from her face. Her jaw began to tremble and she steadied it, averting her eyes from him. He watched her quietly, stroking his fingers down her arm.

"I'm sorry," she muttered quietly, slumping over him and onto his chest carefully. He let his fingers run down her back, pushing the blonde hair from her face.

"What are you sorry for, babe?" He let his lips brush the top of her head, and she pulled her head up to look at him.

"For not telling you sooner." For not telling him about the kiss, or the pregnancy. For lying to him, for continuing to think about the way Link's lips had felt on hers. For every stupid mistake she'd made when it came to their relationship, because the guilt alone was driving her out of her mind.

"How far along are you?" He wondered, still stroking his fingers down her back. She sniffled, biting on her lip.

"About twelve weeks." Her voice was barely even a whisper, and she felt his fingertips pulling gently on the ends of her golden hair. She rested against him for a moment, and finally his hands worked to her shoulders, pulling her away from him so that he could look at her face.

He watched her with wide blue eyes. She suddenly wondered if their baby would have eyes the color of cobalt, like him, or glass, like her own; wondered if its hair would be the wispy blonde of hers, or full and dark like Corny's.

"I just want us to be okay," she found herself whispering the words to him.

He stroked his finger down her cheek, watching her.

"We're going to be fine, Amber. We fight, that's what we do." He smiled softly at her, "That's what we're good at. Although now, I guess we'll have to fight a little less."

He let his hands trace down her front, letting his fingers run over the small bump in her abdomen before looking up at her face.

"I thought maybe-" he let himself nod slightly, "but I didn't want to say anything." He let his fingers play there for a moment, rubbing small circles over the bump beneath her clothes. "Are you happy?"

She let herself think about the question for a moment, and swallowed.

"I think so." It was an odd answer she knew, but if anyone understood its connotation, it would be Corny. He nodded his head, letting his eyes watch her stomach.

"I don't know anything about babies," he admitted softly, his lips turning into a slightly flustered grin.

"Me either."

"Well then, I guess we'll have to learn together." He tilted her chin up, brushing a soft kiss over her lips. "At least I'll actually be able to meet this baby before she turns five." He added the last comment with a slight chuckle, and pressed his cheek against the top of her head. "You're going to be such an amazing mother, Amber." It was almost as if he'd been reading her mind. She let herself smile softly, and rested against his chest again, her lips turning into a simple frown at his words.

She had always told herself that if, or when, this happened, she would be strong. It was different with Sophie; the two of them had already established a relationship before any type of emotional connection was made. But with this baby, all of that would be intricately tied together; the deep roots of connection had already been planted. And though Amber would only admit to being fearful of the actual birthing process, the stretch marks, and the mood swings, she was beyond all of that.

What truly terrified her was the thought of turning into her own mother.


	11. Lost

**It feels so weird not to be writing two stories at the same time, so, I am currently trying to think of ANOTHER full story to start. It's like...if I don't have my plate full, I can't get anything done. I'm hoping to think of one to start by the middle of the week. In the meantime, enjoy!**

_I don't wanna spend my life jaded  
Waiting to wake up one day and find  
That I've let all these years go by  
Wasted_

"Wasted"-Carrie Underwood

* * *

"Happy Birthday, Sophie!" The cries rang out in miscalculation, and were most definitely not in unison. Both Amber and Corny had already stopped attempting to control the horde of eight year olds, and Amber crossed her arms over her chest, chewing on her bottom lip as Sophie blew out her eight candles, sending an inevitable spray of spittle over the entire cake. The corners of Amber's mouth turned slightly up into a sneer, and she shook her head slowly, making her way to the table wielding a kitchen knife. 

"Who wants cake?" Sophie yelled out senselessly, and the children seated at the table began to cry out simultaneously, all of them reaching their little hands towards the round cake that Amber had ordered from the bakery for this occasion. Amber let the knife slide into the vanilla frosting, pushing it to its hilt before drawing it back slowly and repeating her action, pulling it out with the blade and her fingers and sliding it onto a paper plate. "That's mine!" Sophie squealed as the plate hit the table, and she grabbed it greedily, sinking her fork into it without hesitation. "Birthday girl gets the first piece," she chided Amber softly through a mouthful of chocolate. Amber nodded noncommittally and went through the monotonous action over and over again, until each child's mouth was stuffed with the desert, and Amber couldn't help but think that this, slicing cake and standing by as children stuffed themselves, was what the rest of her life would be like.

And now, it wouldn't simply be Sophie's adolescent years; her ninth, tenth, eleventh birthday party. It would be first birthdays, first Christmases, first _everything_. First step, first word, first full night's sleep. Amber realized with a certain unexplainable sullenness, that the rest of her life would be nothing but a celebration of firsts, if only for this baby. Amber herself was through with firsts. No more first kisses (unless Link counted) no more first dates, no more anything. The thought seemed somewhat damning.

Corny slipped up behind her suddenly, sliding his arms around her slender waist, his fingers gently brushing her ever-growing bump of a belly, resting his chin against the nape of her neck.

"You should have been a party planner," he smiled softly into her skin, and she turned to look at him, her eyebrows arching, "or maybe you're just better at being a mother than you thought you were." He kissed the skin on her neck softly, his fingers now linked protectively over the bump, stroking it softly.

There was a sudden rap on the door and Sophie jumped up from her chair, crumbs dangling in the corners of her lips, her feet carrying her quickly to the front door and pulling it open.

"Link!" She greeted him excitedly, and both Amber and Corny turned to look at him quickly. He was holding a small box wrapped in pink paper with a white ribbon tied neatly around it, and he knelt quickly, kissing her cheek.

"You didn't think I'd miss my favorite girl's birthday party, did you?" He grinned at her, and she took the gift from him graciously, grabbing his hand with her free fingers.

"Come on in, we're eating the cake now!" She led him into the house happily, and Amber and Corny watched in sudden amazement. Sophie was still a fan of Link's, and though she didn't speak of him as much as she had at first, there was still an unmistakable blush in her cheeks when anyone mentioned him. Amber wasn't completely sure that Sophie realized that the ill-fated kiss he had bestowed upon her had nearly ended Amber's relationship with Corny, and most certainly was not aware of the fact that Corny was beginning to despise Link. If her child's mind would have been able to comprehend the distance that Link was driving between the three of them, Amber was quite sure Sophie wouldn't have been so enthusiastic to see him all the time.

"Did you invite him to Sophie's party?" Corny's voice had a harsh edge to it as he pulled away from her. Amber narrowed her eyes, suddenly defensive.

"No! I mean, I-I mentioned it was this Saturday, but I didn't ask him to come or anything."

Link smiled almost apologetically at them as he came to stand beside them and Sophie climbed back into her chair, speaking quickly and quietly to all of the children seated at the table.

"Hey," he greeted them almost sheepishly, "Sorry. I hope you guys don't mind me dropping in like this. I just thought-" he paused, as if he were expecting one of them to interrupt him with a sudden surge of hospitality, "I just thought I'd come give Sophie her present. You don't…you don't _mind_, do you?"

Amber knew without even looking at Corny that he _did_ mind, but she shook her head.

"No, of course not; the party's almost over, anyway." She let the corners of her mouth turn into a smile, and directed it at him. "Would you like a piece of cake?"

"Sure." He smiled back at her, and Amber cut a slice, dropping it onto a paper plate and pushing it into his hands. He took a bite, nodded, and made a small, satisfied noise. "It's good."

Amber nodded, and stepped back to stand beside Corny again, more out of loyalty than anything else. She felt his hand brush the small of her back, and stayed close to him, her blue eyes still focused on Link's.

"Milk!" The children began a chant around the table, chocolate crumbs falling from their lips, and Sophie pulled herself from her chair.

"I'll get milk, you guys." She started toward the kitchen and Amber caught her shoulders quickly as the vision of broken shards of glass scattered over the kitchen floor flashed through her mind.

"I'll get it," she corrected her suddenly, "stay here and entertain your friends, Soph."

Sophie shrugged nonchalantly and Amber made her way into the kitchen, pulling the refrigerator door open. She grabbed the milk and slid it onto the counter, pulling glasses down from the cabinet. She felt someone standing beside her suddenly and turned, sucking her breath in as her eyes met Link's face.

"Oh," she laughed softly, "you scared me."

"Sorry," he grinned crookedly, "do you need any help?"

"Uh," she hesitated for a moment, studying the glasses in front of her, "No…I think I'm good. Thanks, though."

She expected him to leave, or even take a step back from her, but he remained in place. She could feel his eyes watching her, but pretended not to.

"Listen, Amber…" he cleared his throat, "I think we need to talk about that…_thing _that happened between us."

Although the situation was growing extremely discomforting by the moment, she was somewhat relieved that he didn't use the actual word; kiss. If he had, that would have meant it was real, and that it happened. Amber was still having trouble accepting it as truth, even if it had been two weeks ago. She kept her eyes on the counter, attempting to steady her hand as she poured the white liquid.

"I'm sorry," he sighed, "It wasn't right, and I guess I shouldn't have done it. You just...you looked so…" she prepared herself for his inevitable words. She looked what? Beautiful? Ravishing? "You looked so lost," he said the words finally, and Amber looked up at him.

"What?"

"Lost," he said it again quickly, "I mean, after you told me about the baby and everything, you just looked so beaten down." He pulled his bottom lip into his mouth and chewed on it for a moment, "I just thought…you just looked like you needed something."

"And that something was _what_?" She found herself speaking back to him, "You?"

He looked caught off-guard for a moment, and then laughed nervously.

"No, not me, necessarily. Just…a break."

"A break from what?" She was still pouring the milk, trying to keep her eyes anywhere but his face.

"From all of this," he motioned around him with his hands, "From this house, from Corny, and Sophie. From pouring milk into glasses for eight-year-olds. A break from pretending to be a mother, and a wife. A break from this life that I'm assuming you never meant to fall into."

His words hit her hard and her hand trembled, causing the milk to drop from her hand, its glass container shattering on the floor and its contents billowing over the floor in a smooth white pool. She glared up at him suddenly, her face flushing deeply. He was beside her in another instant, mopping the spill up with a towel, his eyes still watching her.

"Tell me I'm wrong, Amber." His voice was deep, and serious. She swallowed hard, her eyes locked on his face. Her lips began to tremble, and she opened her mouth to speak. To say what, she wasn't completely sure.

"Amber?" Corny appeared in the doorway of the kitchen suddenly, his eyes dark and concerned. His eyes brushed over Link, who was running the towel over the floor. He pushed the kitchen door open, standing tall suddenly. "What's going on in here?"

"Nothing," Link replied smoothly, standing up. "I knocked the milk over, is all. You got a broom, man?" His hard eyes met Corny's.

"I'll get it," Amber was desperate to get out of there; out of that situation, and hurried through the kitchen and into the supply closet, retrieving the broom and dustpan. When she came back, Link and Corny were still glaring at each other; Link took the broom from her and knelt, sweeping the shards of glass into the dustpan.

"Amber, I think you should come back into the party now." Corny's voice was firm, and she knew better than to question him. "I'll get the milk." He held the door open for her to slip out and back into the living room and Corny let the door shut behind him, leaving him alone in the kitchen with Link.

It seemed to take hours, and finally the two men emerged. She tried to read them for signs of what may have transpired between them, but Link simply regarded her with a soft smile and left a short time after, before any of the children's parents had come.

By the time Sophie had opened her presents (simple, meaningless toys from the other children, a bike from Corny and Amber, and a teddy bear from Link) she was exhausted and crawled into Corny's lap as he sat on the couch that evening, holding the bear protectively under her arm.

"Did you have a good birthday?" He stroked her hair affectionately, and she nodded, pulling her feet up under her.

"Yeah, thanks for the bike." She smiled up at him, "Can I ride it tomorrow?"

"Of course you can," his fingers stroked her soft cheek.

"Hey, Dad?" She wondered from her place on his lap, "When the new baby gets here, I'm still gonna be your little girl, right? I mean, even if it is another girl?" She had taken well to the news that she would soon become a big sister, but both Corny and Amber feared there was a somewhat resentful side to her joy that had yet to show.

"Always," he answered her softly, placing a kiss on her small nose, "Always and forever, baby."

Amber entered the room at the tail-end of their conversation, joining them wordlessly on the couch. Sophie stretched her legs, letting her bare feet rest on Amber's legs. The conversation lulled for a few moments, and only the hum of the television hung in the air between them. Sophie's eyes began to flutter close and Corny shifted carefully out of his place, whispered the word 'shower' to Amber, and left the two of them alone.

Sophie stirred slightly in her sleep after a moment, but Amber's mind was on Link; on his words, and the seeds of doubt that he'd planted in her head. She let her eyes stare blankly at the television, sighing softly.

"Amber," Sophie murmured her name so softly that for a moment, she assumed the child was sleeping. When she pulled herself up slightly, her dark hair falling into her eyes, Amber looked down at her, meeting her gaze. "Does Link make you feel uncomfortable?"

"Why would you think that?" She attempted to swallow the lump in her throat.

"Cause you look at him funny," she observed casually, "Like you're scared he's going to kiss you again or something."

Amber felt the blush rising in her cheeks, and narrowed her eyes.

"How in the world would you know what that looks like?"

Sophie studied her incredulously.

"Cause that's how you used to look at Daddy, before you guys were boyfriend and girlfriend," she said the words softly, resting against the cushion again. "But you said you don't like Link like that, right?"

"Right," Amber replied quietly. No matter how _lost_ Link thought she looked, or no matter how much of a_ break_ he deemed necessary for her, she didn't have feelings for him. She couldn't. She wouldn't. God, she had Corny. Why on earth would she want Link?

"Oh, I almost forgot," Sophie added sleepily after a long silence, "Remember that big dance recital I have coming up?"

Truthfully, Amber didn't, but she nodded in spite of herself.

"Sure. What about it?"

"Well," she yawned, "I just wanted to make sure you're gonna be there. 'Cause all the other girls have their mamas there, and it's gonna be embarrassing if Daddy has to go alone."

"Okay, I'll go." She wasn't exactly sure why, but didn't feel like pressing the matter, and let her head rest against the back of the couch.

"Thanks," Sophie nearly whispered the word, scooting almost inconspicuously closer to Amber. "And when you have the baby, if it's a girl, she can be in dance class, too." She said the words dreamily, "Yeah. If it's a girl, she can be just like you, and if it's a boy, he can be just like Daddy."

"It doesn't have to be _just like_ either of us," Amber informed her quickly, desperate to make a point, but it was too late; Sophie's eyelids had drooped and she was already asleep. Amber let the matter drop, squeezing her eyes shut.

Sophie would one day come to realize that not _every_ child's dream was the same as their parents'. And that, Amber feared, was an issue that all of them would clash over many times in the future.


	12. Discoveries

Drama, drama, drama...and plenty of it for the next few chapters. Enjoy!

P.S. Do you SEE how quickly I'm updating now??? I want a new story to write! My mind is blank. Sniff sniff.

* * *

_I wanna feel a car crash  
'Cause I'm dying on the inside  
I wanna let go and know  
That I'll be all right, all right_

_"Car Crash"-Matt Nathanson_

* * *

The sudden decline of Amber's world began at the most inconspicuous moment, as most unfortunate events do. There had been no spectacularly earth-shattering revelation that had brought it on. It was a simple night, like any other, and Amber had been tucking Sophie into bed. Corny had been in an unusual amount of pain with his back, and Amber had agreed to put Sophie down for sleep. As per usual, there was no bedtime story, and when Amber was preparing to leave the room, Sophie called out to her.

"Amber." She turned to look at the child. "Once this baby is born, you and Daddy aren't going to forget about me, right?"

Amber nodded slightly, already feeling the strain in her back from her growing stomach.

"Right." She licked her dry lips, turning slightly.

"Can you love two people at one time, though?" Sophie called the question out, and though Amber knew she was referring to herself and the baby, her mind had already begun to wonder. She calmed Sophie's fears, returned to Corny's bed, and crawled in beside him. She turned on her side, away from him, and tried to answer the little girl's question in her own mind.

Was she in love with Link? No, she didn't think so. It wasn't exactly the same thing she felt when she was with Corny, and Link definitely didn't give her that sense of comfort and safety. Still, there was _something_. There was something that kept her thinking about his lips, and his words; something that kept her awake at night, and made her furrow her eyebrows at that engagement ring on her left hand. There was something that was causing this underlying guilt in the pit of her stomach, something that made her look away when Corny questioned her directly about Link. There was certainly no denying any of that, as much as she would have liked to. It kept her in a constant state of guilt, and she felt bad that she often found herself thinking of Link at night when she was next to her fiancée. It wasn't necessarily _those_ kinds of thoughts that she entertained about Link, but Corny would be none too happy to know she was thinking of him at all, much less when she was with Corny himself.

That was how Amber knew that she had to do _something_. She had to figure out exactly how she felt about Link, and quick, because constantly thinking of him was driving her insane. She knew it wasn't fair to Corny, because he'd been nothing if not faithful to her since they'd begun dating, and even if she was only _thinking_ about Link and not acting on it, it was still something. It was still inappropriate, and still wrong.

The morning after her somewhat mind-bending conversation with Sophie, she made another disturbing self-discovery: the majority of her clothes no longer fit. It wasn't necessarily the best time to unearth such information, considering that the entire reason she couldn't seem to stop thinking about Link was because he had made her feel wanted when she felt oddly undesirable for the first time in her life, yet that was the way it had happened.

On that particular morning, she woke Corny with a kiss, informed him that she needed to go back to her apartment for a few hours to find some clothes to fit her, and left his house. She found herself in the quiet apartment sometime later, ruffling through the clothing that she'd left in her closet when she'd basically moved into Corny's. She sighed as she realized exactly why she'd left these clothes behind, sneering at the ugly designs and patterns that she found hard to believe she'd worn at one time. Well, if nothing else, at least this pregnancy was a good reason to go shopping. That seemed to be _all_ it was good for; save maybe the few days of sanity that it had salvaged for her and Corny. There was a knock at the door of the apartment suddenly, and she pulled her head out of the jungle of clothes, narrowing her eyes and straightening her hair as she made her way to the front hallway, pulling the door open and sucking her breath in as she saw him.

"Link," her eyes were suddenly, unconsciously, wide, "what are you doing here?"  
And though she asked the question, she could do little more than pretend to listen to his answer, because she found herself staring at his lips as he spoke. Her breath was caught in her throat, and she felt her cheeks flushing as he laughed nonchalantly, presumably making a joke to which she could only feign a chuckle in response.

This was it; she realized suddenly, this was a sign. Link had literally shown up on her doorstep at exactly the right, or depending upon how you looked at it, _wrong_ time. If he noticed that her cheeks were flushing suddenly, he pretended not to, and smiled warmly at her.

"So, can I come in?"

"Of course," she stepped aside for him to enter, not bothering to close the door behind them. He brushed past her, turning to look at her from his current position, still watching her expectantly.

"You're, um," he paused, letting his eyes graze her stomach, "getting bigger. I guess that's a _good_ thing?"

She looked at him, and felt her eyebrows furrowing slightly, but wasn't exactly sure if she had any right to act indignant about his remark. It wasn't a _bad_ thing, she presumed, that her stomach was growing, but he had said the words with such an arrogant air that she couldn't tell if he was making fun of her, or asking a simple question.

"Uh, yeah," she let the corners of her mouth turn into a light smile, "good, I guess."

She allowed her tongue to dart out and wet her lips, her two front teeth digging into the soft flesh. She took a few steps toward Link slowly, clenching her teeth together as she worked up the nerve to say any of the words that she'd been planning in her head.

"Link," his name got caught in her throat, and she ended up spitting it out as he looked at her.

"What?"

"Why did you say those things? The other day, you know, at Sophie's party."

"I just thought they needed to be said," he answered her after a moment. "You didn't deny them." He added the last part as an afterthought, purposefully looking up at her face.

"I shouldn't have to," she felt stiff saying the words, and even straightened her posture a little, "I don't have to explain myself to you."

"Must be a nice change from what you're used to, then, huh?" His eyebrows arched slightly, watching her nonchalantly, "Corny's like a vulture. All eyes on you, all the time."

"He's my fiancé," she felt the need to defend him suddenly.

"Exactly. Not your master."

"I never said he was-" She stopped, "He doesn't own me. It's called being in an honest relationship, Link. You should try it sometime."

"It's called being your own person, Amber. You should try that."

She narrowed her eyes at him, her cheeks flushing.

"You can't talk to me like that. I'm your boss now, in case you've forgotten."

He smirked at her, crossing his arms over his chest and resting back against the wall.

"You're so full of shit. You try to play that professional woman card, and in the meantime you're screwing the man that _used _to run the show," he berated her, shaking his head.

"I'm not _screwing_ him, you moron. I think we've moved past _screwing_; we're engaged. That little tidbit of information seems to keep slipping out of that rock that you call a brain," she narrowed her gaze at him, "And what the hell do you want from me? You criticize me for my personal life, and then for my professional life. I can only be _so_ many people, Link."

She wasn't exactly sure why she felt the need to defend herself against him. With their history, she certainly didn't feel like she needed to prove anything to him. It occurred to her suddenly that perhaps she needed to prove these things to herself, rather than anyone else.

"Well then why don't you start being the person _you_ want to be, Amber? Forget about Corny for a minute, will you? Forget about the fact that you're engaged, and just tell me, what the hell do you want from _you_?" His eyes were dark suddenly, and she found herself inexplicably closer to him. She twisted her pink lips into a scowl, her eyes locked on his.

"Why do you have so much trouble accepting the fact that I _love_ him?" She felt her mouth going dry, "And that I'm happy with my life?"

He stared back at her, unwavering.

"Why do _you_?"

She wanted to smack him at that instant, to fire him just as she had fired Corny those years ago for infuriating her beyond belief by kissing her. She knew, though, that that was not what this situation called for. Her pounding heart, and flushed face told her that. She needed to seize this opportunity, to use it to figure out what in the hell was wrong with her, why she couldn't get him out of her brain when all she wanted was to forget about him. Suddenly, there was only one plausible solution, and though she knew it was wrong, it was completely necessary. She needed to do this like she'd never needed anything before.

The moment that she pushed her lips against his, sending his head back against the wall with the force, she knew it was a mistake. There was nothing spectacular about the kiss that she instigated, nothing that made her stomach quiver, or her head spin. Nothing that left her breathless, or made her want to throw her engagement ring back at Corny, and tell him that she loved Link instead.

The kiss couldn't have lasted more than five seconds, but she felt his hands pressing against the small of her back, obviously attempting to get deeper into the kiss. She was just beginning to place her hands on his shoulders, just beginning to push herself away from the kiss that had confirmed the fact that she was most definitely _not_ in love, or even attracted to, Link, when the even words split through the deafening silence.

"What the fuck, Amber." It was not a question; it was a statement, and it came from the open doorway.

Of course she knew, without even looking, that it was Corny.


	13. Truth

So, I thought of a new idea for a story, but I just can't get it right. I dont know, maybe I'm just losing my touch. Oh well, at least there's still this. I'm hoping I'll be really inspired when I get the DVD. I think I will be.

* * *

_When you're lost and you run out of road  
Find what I already know  
In the end, close is all there is  
But you won't find this_

_"You Won't Find This" -Carrie Underwood_

* * *

"Corny…" she could barely find his name, and felt her throat constricting. Link, of course, was gone; he'd darted out of her apartment the second after Corny had spoken, pushing past Amber as if she were nothing more than a bag of garbage, rushing down the steps and into the city streets. She couldn't exactly say she blamed him. After all, it would be better not to have him here now, when he could attest nothing to her defense. "It's not…I swear it wasn't what it looks like." She knew the words were stupid, and the truth was, it was _exactly_ what it had looked like. Except then again, it _wasn't_.

"Really?" He was mocking her now, and crossed his arms over his chest, his eyes narrowing into angry slits, "Well then, tell me. What exactly is it, Amber?"

"Okay, fine," she swallowed hard, watching him, "Okay, it _is_ what it looked like, but you have to let me explain! Corny, I-I just-" She felt herself beginning to sputter as he cut her off.

"You just obviously enjoy kissing Link, right?" He sneered at her, "Is that what you're trying to say? 'Cause if it is, you really don't have to bother."

"No!" She almost squealed the word, wanting nothing more at this moment than to kiss Corny himself, to clutch his biceps and trace her fingers down his strong, muscular chest, to snuggle into his embrace without question. "That's the thing!"

"What thing?" He was unimpressed and equally uninterested.

"_The_ thing!" She cried the words happily, taking a step closer to him, "I _don't_ enjoy kissing Link! I mean, I was afraid, you know, since he kissed _me_ that maybe I _did_ like it, and that maybe I was having these doubts because-" She was speaking quickly now, her cheeks slightly flushed, her eyes wide and watching him. She just _knew_ that if she said the words quick enough and in just the right way, Corny would see the humor in all of this and forgive her immediately, without the long, drawn-out fight that she was sure would result otherwise.

"Doubts?" His voice was sharp, and as she moved toward him, he moved back. "Doubts about what?"

"Oh," she scoffed lightly, hesitating for a moment, but deciding quickly that he would soon see the somewhat ironic humor in this situation, "Just, you know, about us, and things…but that's not important here, Corny. What's important is that-" She reached her fingers out to stroke his arm, and he pushed her hand away from him, glaring at her with dark, angry eyes that she wasn't completely sure she'd ever seen on him before.

"Us?" He spit the word back at her, as if it were an illness. "What do you mean, Amber? Our engagement?"

She felt her mouth dropping open slightly, though she was no longer sure of what to say. Corny didn't seem to find the irony in this situation at all. He didn't seem to understand that it wasn't what she had just _done_ that mattered; it was what she had just realized. There were so many things that she needed to say, but from the angry look on his face, she assumed he felt the need to speak at the moment as well, and simply let herself nod.

"Doubts about marrying me?" His words were a rhetorical question; she knew that he wasn't waiting for an answer. He was simply repeating the words aloud, as if he couldn't comprehend them any other way. His eyes were still watching her intently, squinting. "Jesus, Amber. I didn't realize it was such a tormenting decision. If you think that engagement ring is some sort of dog collar, just give me the damn thing back."

"No!" She felt the word surging in her throat, even before he was finished speaking. Her eyes began to burn with tears suddenly, her hands flying to his chest, her palms pressing against him before he took another step back to break the contact. "God, no! That's not what I want!"

"Well then what the hell do you want, Amber?" His voice was louder now, and his tone frightened her. "What the fuck? Honestly." He hit his hand against the wall and she started, her feet stumbling back a few steps, finally moving away from him. He looked away from her, though only for a moment, and then shook his head. "What is it, Amber? What do you want; me, or Link?"

Her mouth dropped open slightly at the ridiculousness of his question. She realized, a moment later, that she was clutching her engagement ring tightly, in an almost unconscious effort to tell him what she couldn't seem to say herself.

"I'm not playing this damn game with you anymore." He spoke again, though his tone was neither softer nor more forgiving. "It's not cute, or funny. It's not charming; _you_ are not charming, Amber. I don't know what this is, what you've become since he's come back into town, but I don't like it. You are that spoiled, bratty-ass little girl that I used to _hate_. You think that because I have you, and Link wants you, you are God's gift to the world, and believe me, Amber Von Tussle, you are _no_ gift. You are a plague."

She sucked her breath in, sharp tears stinging her eyes.

"Corny!" She wanted to cry over his hurtful insults, but couldn't seem to find the strength, "That's awful! How could you?"

"How could _I_?" He lashed back at her suddenly, "How could I dare say anything bad to my precious little fiancé who has kissed another man at least twice in the last few weeks? How could I confront you for it, or come to your apartment to help you when I _thought_ you were here looking for clothes? How could I what, Amber?"

"How could you say those things to me?" She felt a sob rising in her chest, but fought it down. She squinted her eyes at him, attempting to harbor her tears, her fingers curling into tight fists at her side. She shook her head at him, attempting to comprehend the horrible insults he'd just thrown at her. Of course she knew, deep inside, that this was her fault; that kiss, this argument, his anger. It was all her fault, there was no one else to blame except her. At least for the first kiss, she'd been an innocent bystander, but this one had been all her. No matter that Link had shown up at her doorstep, or that he'd practically been asking her for it. That was neither here nor there; she had initiated this kiss through her own volition, and the fact that Corny was hurting her right now, that was her fault, as well.

"I mean…how could you?" She asked the question again. Even if she knew that this was all on her, it didn't mean that she couldn't attempt to make him feel guilty. His words had been harsh and somewhat unnecessary; a simple 'Amber, what in the hell is wrong with you' would have suited her needs just fine. He continued to glare at her, his gaze not softening, and as if on reflex, she let her hands drop to her stomach, cradling the ever-growing bump protectively. "Corny, think about this," her voice was pleading with him now, and as she met his eyes, she saw a flicker of emotion. "This should be all the proof you need. Think about this baby, okay? Think about _our_ baby, Corny."

And in that same instant, the sympathy was gone from his eyes again, and he turned his face away from her. He shook his head for a moment, and when he looked back at her, she barely recognized him in the hardened expression.

"Is it, Amber?" If Amber had been asked to choose a word to describe his tone in that moment, the only one that could have come to mind was unkind. She furrowed her golden eyebrows, her fingers still resting against the bump in her abdomen.

"Is it what?" She was genuinely confused, and tilted her head slightly to the side, prompting a further explanation from him. He was quiet for a moment, and something about his hesitation led her to believe that he was questioning himself; asking if he should even say the words that were already on the tip of his tongue.

"Is it our baby?" He asked after a long moment, and though she pretended not to, she could see the hurt in his eyes as he said the words. "Is it _my_ baby, Amber?"

It would have been the truth to say that, at that moment, a little part of Amber died. The part that honestly believed that Corny had faith in her; in them. The part that had always assumed Corny knew her better than she knew herself; the part that had always been able to convince her that Corny knew she loved him, and nothing else mattered.

She wasn't exactly sure how to answer that question, and as she watched him silently, she was suddenly deathly afraid that he _believed_ the lies he had told himself; that this baby was not, in fact, his, and belonged to another man. She finally let one solitary tear roll down her cheek, pushing it away with the back of her hand. She didn't want to know if he had seen that. If he had, he might tell himself she was crying because he'd finally caught onto her twisted game. In fact, she was crying because they suddenly seemed to be losing their _own_ game.

"Do you mean that?" She finally found the courage to ask the question, and he looked away from her. There was a deep, throbbing pain inside of her, and, for the briefest moment, she was afraid of having a miscarriage. It subsided only seconds later, and when she didn't see any blood pooling at her feet, she forced herself to turn her attention back to the situation at hand.

"Let me come home," her voice was trembling as she made the proposition, and she felt so utterly weak. "Let's just go home, and we'll talk about this. Okay?"

There was no part of her that was expecting him to deny her now; not when she wasn't being bitchy or bratty. Not when she was speaking in a calm, collected voice, and he could clearly see that he'd broken her will to fight him.

"No." His voice was firm, his eyes unafraid to meet her glossy gaze. "You stay here. You're not the only one who has to think things over, Amber."

He was gone a moment later, and she was left alone in the apartment. The few articles of clothing she had pulled from her closet to take back to the house with her were draped over a chair, and she found a deafening sadness in them suddenly. She let the tears slip down her cheeks without abandon, shutting the door quietly as she heard Corny descending the stairs.

She found herself in her bed moments later, her fingers still curling around her slightly swollen stomach, tears slipping down her cheeks as she attempted to hold herself, to comfort herself, and this nondescript, senseless bump that had seemed to create so many problems for her.

She thought of it suddenly, and only for a fleeting moment, but the thought was there, all the same. Even though she felt ridiculous for thinking of it now, and she hadn't seen the other woman in years, she couldn't stop herself.

Amber finally understood, at this moment, what it must have been like, all those years ago, for Brenda.


	14. The Hardest Part

So... my last couple chapters haven't gotten very many reviews and it makes me sad! If people aren't reading, I don't really see the point in writing. So, if you're reading and liking, please let me know.

BTW::: SIX. DAYS. UNTIL. HAIRSPRAY. ON. DVD!!

* * *

_And both sides say they're winning  
And both sides know they're losing  
And neither one knows what they're fighting for_

_"Uncivil War" - Martina McBride_

It had been four days since she and Corny had fought in her apartment, and four days since she'd seen, or spoken to him. Over ninety-six hours since she'd stepped foot in the house that they'd practically shared for almost a year now. It was difficult, not simply because she _missed_ him (which she genuinely did) but because the majority of her possessions were in that house, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to get by with what little she had in her apartment.

She had gone shopping two days after the fight; if Amber found comfort in anything, it was retail therapy. She managed to find new clothes that would disguise the bump, and stared regretfully at it in the reflection of the dressing room mirrors, furrowing her eyebrows and letting herself wonder exactly how her life had gotten to this point. This point of being pregnant, alone; torn between a love that she'd never expected to feel so deeply, and one that simply wouldn't stop nagging her.

It was on this fourth day that Amber decided that Corny was going to forgive her. She was lonely, and tired of sleeping alone in the big bed in which, if she remembered correctly, she and Corny had made love in for the first time. She readied herself, and drove to his house, not allowing herself to cry, or even feel a moment of hesitance as she made her way to the front door. There was no doubt in Amber's mind, even as she stood on the front porch after ringing the doorbell, that Corny wouldn't forgive her. There was absolutely no part of her that expected him to turn her away now, after so many days of being apart. If anything, she expected him to fall to his knees at her very presence, maybe kiss her hands and tell her never to stay away for so long ever again. It wasn't that she thought he was at any sort of fault, of course; it was simply that she _knew_ by now, he probably had already forgotten about their fight. He probably realized what had been happening, and that she'd been telling him the truth all along. Well, at least when she hadn't been hiding things from him.

A tiny brunette head appeared at the door a moment later, and Amber smiled softly back at Sophie.

Amber grinned a little, almost foolishly, wondering if Sophie would be just as excited to see her as she knew Corny would be. It appeared, though, that she had been somewhat mistaken. Sophie stared back at her with dark, unsympathetic eyes that were narrowed into slits of hatred. "Hi, Sophie," Amber said the words slowly.

"Go away." Sophie's voice was quiet, and she made no attempt to move, or to open the door for her. In fact, she kept her fingers tight on the handle, to prevent Amber from opening it herself.

"Just let me in," she requested softly, moving to open the door.

"_No_. I said, _go away_." The child twisted her mouth into a pout, her knuckles turning white with the force she held the door shut with. "Just go home, Amber. Nobody wants you here."

Amber's mouth dropped open slightly, her eyes narrowing.

"Sophie! What would your father say if he heard you talk to me like that?" She was defensive suddenly, and grabbed for the door handle again.

"He doesn't want you here, either." She spit the words at her, "He wants you to go home so that he doesn't have to see your ugly face."

Amber felt her cheeks flush, gasping slightly.

"Sophie Anna Collins! You do _not_ speak to me like that, do you understand?" The force with which she spoke surprised both of them, and she curled her fingers around the screen door handle. "Now open this damn door."

Sophie stood on the other side of the door, glowering at her, her tiny face twisted into an ugly pout, her eyes narrowed and unforgiving. Amber could see her clenching her jaw, and she stood at the door for another moment, finally sighing in over-dramatic exasperation, rolling her eyes pointedly at Amber before storming out of Amber's line of vision and down the hallway, slamming what Amber could only presume was her bedroom door.

She furrowed her eyebrows, pulling the door open and stepping inside, suddenly overwhelmed by the drastic change in the house in the few days she'd been gone. Laundry was strewn about the room, empty food boxes cluttered the cocktail table, and Sophie's toys were scattered over the floor. She made sure to watch her feet as she stepped over stuffed animals, Barbies, and papers that Amber could only assume were Sophie's unfinished homework. She sighed, looking around at the house that had been in such neat array only days before; was Corny actually this helpless without her? No, she decided quickly. He was simply too distraught to clean; he had no idea how to ask her to forgive him for all of the incorrect assumptions he'd made on her part. He had been too afraid to admit that he couldn't live without her. Well, she would have to take the first step to reconciliation on their part.

"Corny?" She called his name, poking her head into the kitchen to find it empty. She hesitated for a moment, then yelled for him again as her feet began to carry her to the hall towards his bedroom. He was before her suddenly, his arms crossed over his chest and the plain white t-shirt stretched across his skin. His gaze was hard, and he let his eyes focus on her face.

"Corny," she breathed his name in a sigh of relief, letting a smile pass over her face, "It's so good to see you again. I missed you."

She felt the blush rising in her cheeks at even being this close to him, and suddenly tried to block out the awful things he'd said to her during their fight. It wasn't important now, that was for sure. She was attempting to swallow her pride, and to be the woman that even her mother had never been strong enough to be; the one who accepted defeat gracefully, and apologized for wrongdoings. As she took a step towards him, she was grateful that he didn't move back, but also made no move to embrace her or her presence.

"What are you doing here, Amber?" He sounded neither pleased nor excited to see her again. There was no catch in his voice, as if he'd been crying over her. Not even a little shakiness; simply the strong, firm, stubborn Corny she'd always known. In a way, it was good. His conviction was back, that was for sure. He was no long unsure of himself, and that made her happy. Still, as long as he was standing so obviously closed-off to her, she couldn't erase the unease in the pit of her stomach.

"I'm here…" she needed to use the exact right words. She didn't want him to know how sure she was of his confidence, of the fact that he was dying without her. "I'm here to apologize."

"Apologize for what?" His response was sharp, his gaze still hard.

Amber blinked.

"For everything." She hesitated. Had he really forgotten their entire fight? Had he blocked out all of those painful things they'd said to each other, and pretended it had never happened?

"That's a lot to be sorry for," he said the words after a brief moment, but she nodded along with him. "But if there is anything you are, Amber, it's definitely sorry."

His words hit her suddenly, and she felt a lump growing in her throat, her eyes narrowing at him.

"Excuse me?" She was literally too shocked to say anything else; this definitely was _not_ the homecoming she'd expected from him. He was still watching her with dark, narrow eyes, unwavering stubbornness.

"You heard me." He turned away from her, beginning to walk back into his bedroom. "I told you I needed time to think things over, Amber. You can't just decide when you should be forgiven, and come here and expect to make things okay again. You just can't."

"Well somebody has to!" She spit the words back at him, "If it was up to you we'd end up never speaking again."

He turned on his heels, glaring at her suddenly.

"Well at least _one_ of us has a little self-control then." He shook his head at her, "God, Amber, what happened to you? You used to be this strong, vibrant, independent woman. You used to not give a shit what other people thought of you, and now what are you? What is this thing that you've become?" His words carried a harsh edge, and she knew that the point of civility was over.

"I've become everything you've turned me into." Her words were quiet, but not nearly pleasant. She took a step closer to him. "You've turned me into everything I've never wanted to be. A wife, and a mother; a maid, and a cook, and a chauffer. You've forced me to become this woman that I _never_ wanted to be. You've ruined every part of who I am, Corny." She swallowed hard. "You got me pregnant. Whether or not you want to take credit for it doesn't matter. This," she gestured to her stomach, "Is your _fault_, Corny."

She knew her words were harsh, and somewhat untrue. She didn't mind being any of those things, not in actuality. What she _did_ mind, though, was Corny having the upper hand in this fight. She hated letting him know he had control, especially when he was using it to fight against her.

"My _fault_?" She was back to the moment quickly, and he was gaping at her like she'd just confessed a murder. "What the hell do you mean, _my fault_? It isn't anyone's damn fault, Amber, it's a baby!"

"It isn't a baby," she shot the words back quickly, "It's a useless lump of nothing inside of me." Immediately after she'd said the words, she felt horrible about them. Still, though as much as she didn't want to admit it, part of her believed them to be true. She hadn't grown emotionally attached to this fetus at all, hadn't tried to think of baby names, or nursery decorations. She hadn't even bothered to make follow-up doctor appointments.

Corny's eyes flashed dark suddenly, and he sneered at her.

"You heartless bitch," he spit the words back at her. "You know, I used to think it was just an urban legend that Von Tussles don't have hearts, but now I know it's true." He glowered at her. "You know, Amber, I think it's now safe to say that you're a worse mother than even Brenda was."

She scoffed loudly.

"And you would know, right?" She yelled back at him, "Since you were there with her during her pregnancy? Were you there helping her raise the little brat that _you_ abandoned? Damnit, Corny, you didn't even meet the kid until she showed up at your door! How in the hell can you preach to me about good parenting skills?"

"Leave Sophie's name out of your mouth," he directed her harshly, "believe me, Amber, you don't need another enemy right now."

She laughed loudly, mostly from irony, and glared at him.

"Enemies? Is that what we are now, Corny?"

He said nothing in response to her question, but kept his eyes focused on her, his face focused and angry.

"Well, we're certainly not friends, are we?" His voice was quieter, but still hard. She opened her mouth to speak, but honestly had no idea what to say. She glanced down at her left hand, glaring at the diamond on her ring finger.

"So I guess the promises we made each other are null and void?" She glared up at him, tears burning in her eyes. He looked away from her face, and Amber glanced back at the floor, letting the fingers of her right hand slip protectively around her left ring finger.

"You don't even know what a promise is." The voice was quieter, softer than Corny's and Amber realized it was Sophie, turning to look at her.

"What?" She wasn't even completely sure she'd heard her right. Sophie stared at her, her hands on her hips, glaring up at the blonde woman.

"I said you don't know what a promise is," she repeated herself, her stare hard. Amber rolled her eyes.

"Sophie, this doesn't involve you. This is about your father and me." She waited for Corny to back her up; to send Sophie to her room, but he stood silently, his eyes watching his daughter.

"No it's not, Amber," Sophie's voice was annoyed now, "Not everything is always about _you_, you know. There are other people living in this house, too."

"Fine!" Amber turned to her suddenly, glaring down at her, "What in the hell are you so angry about?"

Sophie clenched her jaw, staring at Amber with squinted brown eyes.

"You missed my dance recital," her words were eerily quiet, "You _promised_ me you would go, and you didn't. Daddy had to go by himself, and now everybody makes fun of me because I don't have a mama _or_ an Amber, like I told them I did."

Shit. That had honestly and completely slipped Amber's mind. She had been too absorbed in her shallow self-realizations that she'd completely neglected the fact that Sophie's dance recital _had_ been two days ago. Still, there were more important things to tend to than something as trivial as a performance.

"There will be more," Amber concluded in her defense, and Sophie shook her head.

"That doesn't matter. You're not gonna be there anyway, because you're never invited to anything of mine ever again." Sophie's face was burning red now, and Amber snorted.

"I guess I'll have to learn to deal with that, won't I?" She rolled her eyes at the child, and Sophie made a loud exasperated noise, stomping her foot on the carpet.

"You don't know anything!" Sophie yelled suddenly, "You're so stupid, Amber!"

"Sophie!" Amber said her name loudly in a desperate attempt to halt the child's words, "You can't-"

"You're such a mean, nasty, horrible person!" Sophie went on without interruption, "You don't even know what it means to be in a family, and you're too selfish to even care about anybody but yourself! You don't even know how to keep a really important promise!"

Amber was slightly taken aback.

"I told you I-"

"You promised me that you would come to my recital, and you promised my daddy that you would love him, and then you kissed Link! I never told anybody about your secret kiss with Link, because you made me promise not to!"

Amber sucked her breath in, her face burning red suddenly. This was it; the snowball effect. Things had begun their downward spiral, and there was no chance of resuscitation. She turned slightly to look at Corny, but he was looking away from her now, his hard gaze focused on anything but Amber.

"You're supposed to love us!" Sophie yelled the words at her, and it made Amber's heartbeat pause for a moment. "You're supposed to love Daddy with all your heart and soul, and more than the stars in the sky and the starfish in the sea! You promised that you would do that, but you don't! Daddy says you don't even love your own baby! And you don't love me." Sophie paused for a moment, wiping the tears that had slipped from her eyes, "And I don't love you, either."

To say that her words had affected Amber would have been an understatement. She found herself gasping for breath slightly, her heart pounding in her chest. All of that; all of those truths from the unbiased view of an eight-year-old. Amber felt the hot tears on her face suddenly, and raised her fingers to her cheek, touching the tears as if she'd never cried before, and this was all new to her. She took a step back; retreated from both Corny and Sophie, and let her mouth open slightly, in order to defend herself, or to protest. She wasn't completely sure why, but those words, the ones from Sophie, had hurt more than anything else. She felt as if the wind had been knocked out of her, and shook her head slowly. Her fingers were still unconsciously encircling her engagement ring, still clutching onto it as if it were the secret of life. And maybe, in some ways, it was. It was the one thing that had tried to show her there was more to life than work, more than business and loneliness. It was the one thing that linked her to _something_, and not just Corny, but an entire family, and a future.

She separated herself from the moment as she pulled the ring from her finger. It was the first time she'd taken it off since Corny had slipped it onto her finger all those months ago, and without the cool silver against her skin, she felt naked and unprotected. She clutched it in her palm for a moment, not bothering to wipe the lingering tears from her cheek. She sniffed loudly, studied the ring silently for a moment, and then spoke, her voice trembling.

"Well, if you both think I'm such a horrible person, I guess I have no reason to keep this." She clutched Corny's hand suddenly, turning his open palm up, laying the ring in the middle of his large hand, and curling his fingers over it. She let her eyes meet his again, letting her shoulders droop slightly. "If you don't trust me, and your daughter hates me, I can't marry you. I'm not spending the rest of my life like this."

She fully expected him to fall to his knees now, insist she take the ring back. Instead, he narrowed his gaze at her, and turned, slamming his bedroom door behind him as he entered the other room.

And then her feet were carrying her out of the house, down the front steps, and into her car. She sobbed loudly as she slammed the car door shut behind her, burying her head into her hands and crying for a moment before finally realizing that it would be much easier to break down about this in private.

She drove to her apartment building, and pulled open the front door. Her legs carried her up a few steps, but then she collapsed against the landing in the staircase, her body wracking with sobs. More than any of the hurtful words Corny or Sophie had said, Amber could not stop thinking about the fact that he hadn't even _tried_ to chase after her.


	15. Soft

**Thanks, guys, I'm glad you let me know you still care about the story, it means so much. TWO DAYS UNTIL HAIRSPRAY! YAY! Enjoy!!**

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_Now I've looked in the mirror_

_And the world's getting clearer  
I'll take what you give me _

_Please know that I'm learning  
So wait for me this time_

"Time"- Chantal Kreviazuk

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Though nights seemed to drag on without Corny around, days began to pass quickly. Soon, it was a week after the fight, then two. Amber had grown solemnly accustomed to being alone. She spent her days at the studio, often working until late evening, and until there was a cramp in her lower back. She had begun to neglect her body and often went all day without eating, never realizing the long term effects it could have on her, or the fetus inside of her.

Her stomach was larger now; it had grown quickly over the past few weeks, as had her resentment. Her resentment for that _thing_ inside of her; for Corny, for Sophie, for Link. For all of them, making her so miserable; for herself, for letting herself care _so_ damn much about all of them. The thought of not loving this fetus inside of her scared her. What if she never learned to love it? What if, when it was born, instead of getting that expected surge of love, she felt nothing? What if, every time she looked at it, she only saw Corny, and all the resentment there, and she hated it for that? There were so many fears running rampant through her mind, and for the first time in a long time, Corny wasn't there to calm them. He couldn't hold her hand, or stroke her hair. He couldn't assure her that everything would be fine. And deep in her heart, she knew it wouldn't.

Months ago, she hadn't been able to wait for this day; today. She hadn't been able to contain herself at the thought of Corny returning to the show, his back healed and nearly as good as new. Now, of course, she was dreading it. She had been since she'd slipped that ring off her finger and into Corny's palm. She was absolutely terrified of being in the same building as him, much less the same confined studio space.

Besides being upset about their fight and broken engagement, she was mad. Furious, actually. She couldn't believe that Corny hadn't cared enough to even _try_ and get her back. Couldn't believe that he hadn't called, or shown up on her doorstep; hadn't tried to get in contact with her at all, not even for the sake of the baby. Though, God knew, she wasn't doing much of _anything_ for the sake of the baby, so how could she blame him for the same thing?

She managed to keep her eyes averted from him as she sensed him in the studio, and though her cheeks were blushing furiously with all of the pent-up emotion inside of her, she refused to let it show. She refused to even speak civilly to him because there was no point in it; once she so much as saw him, she would lose it; her cool, her temper, the shaky confidence she was attempting to build. It would all be for naught.

Although Corny had been scheduled to return today, Link was still the host, at least for the moment. Corny was more of a simple stage presence at the time, perched behind his podium, drumming out the rhythm to the music as Link moved with the council members. The crew and cast were just now beginning to learn of the turbulence between Amber and Corny, and many of them still approached her with the expectant 'Are you happy Corny is back?', to which she could merely utter a reply that she hoped they would not question.

She kept busy during the day, even though she knew he was in close proximity of her, she refused to let herself seek him out. She didn't want to see him, because she knew that now that he had _this_, his precious show, back, he didn't want anything else. That's what all of their problems had been about, she told herself, that when he'd been taken out of control, he'd gone stir-crazy and had nothing better to do than fight with her. When the show began, she observed from the edge of the dance floor, as always, but made sure to keep her eyes glued on the council members. She'd even thought about watching Link, if only to spite Corny, whose eyes she was sure would meet her own eventually, but decided against it. The very last thing she needed in her life right now was more drama, or to lead Link on in believing that she felt any certain way about him.

He'd tried to talk to her since that day he'd bolted from her apartment, leaving her to deal with Corny's wrath alone, but she hadn't been exactly sure how to respond to him. He claimed that he only wanted the best for her, and though part of her believed him, she couldn't help but hate him just a little because, before he had come along, she'd_ had_ the best. She'd had a fiancé, and a home, and a family. She'd had more than ever before in her life, and now, she had nothing.

By the time the show finished taping, Amber felt slightly relieved. She'd officially gotten through the first day of Corny's return, and that meant things could only get easier from here on out, didn't it? The council members scattered, and the crew began to chatter nonchalantly as the cameras rolled back into place until the next afternoon. Amber felt her stomach growl, and was sure that anyone in a close proximity could hear it. She glanced toward the snack table, her eyes raking over the piles of food that rested on glass platters. Donuts, sandwiches, potato chips. It was all junk, and junk that she had, for the first year she'd worked here, happily taken part in. Now, however, there didn't seem to be much of a point. Her stomach was big enough, and she had no desire to eat. She wasn't hungry, even if her stomach said she was.

It may have been stupid, but this stand she was taking against food, it was because of Corny. Because she had such an intense desire to show him that she knew how to care for herself and didn't _need_ him in her life, she had all but stopped eating. Especially now, and in front of him. She wanted him to wonder about her, and if the only way to do that was to deprive herself of a few essential nutrients, she was more than willing to comply.

It was odd, watching him unbutton his suit jacket and loosen his tie, knowing that he was going to be leaving without her. Knowing that he wouldn't give her a quick kiss before telling her that he and Sophie would meet her at home later, or ask her what she felt like having for dinner. No, he would pick Sophie up alone, and they would probably heat up TV dinners and chat casually on the couch. Meanwhile, she'd go home, eat half a bag of stale popcorn and fall asleep over a pile of her take-home work, still wearing her clothes. But she could pretend that tonight she had a fabulous date; maybe with Link. She would pretend that she needed to hurry home so that she could pull on a silk gown and go out for a night on the town. She refused to let him see that her world had already crashed down around her.

She turned away from the concession table just as she felt him behind her. It was difficult to explain, but she'd known him and had been so intimately close to him for _so_ long that she could sense him without ever seeing him. Then, of course, she smelled him; that deep, heavenly scent of his cologne filled her nostrils, and she felt her knees beginning to tremble. Part of her wanted to grab him, to ask him to _please_ forgive her for all of the idiotic mistakes she'd made, and she had almost convinced herself to do it, but when she turned and met his hard eyes, it was suddenly obvious that he wasn't interested in any such thing from her.

"Corny." She held her chin high, looking him in the eyes and clutching her clipboard. Her mind searched for aimless compliments. _Great show_, _good to see you back. It's nice to see you walking again_. None of them made sense, or were even completely true. She decided not to say anything at all.

"Are you eating?" It wasn't a kind, sympathetic tone in his voice, but harsh and sharp as he eyed the food table over her shoulder.

She kept eye contact with him.

"I don't quite see what business it is of yours anymore." She pretended to be indignant while secretly thriving on the fact that he was actually here, speaking to her, asking her about herself.

His eyes narrowed into angry slits at once, flashing dark.

"Damnit, Amber." He turned to go, and then looked back at her. "All I know is that baby _better_ not be suffering because of its neglectful mother. Now that I'm not around to keep an eye on you, you're probably starving yourself on purpose, aren't you?"

_Yes_. "No," she answered him, feeling a sudden pressure on her chest, "I'm not a child, Corny. I don't need to be supervised."

"Well, you know what? I think that right now even Sophie is acting a hell of a lot more like an adult than you are, Amber." He glared at her, shaking his head before walking away. "You're so clueless. Let me know when you get your damn priorities in order."

She couldn't get him out of her mind for the rest of the day. The way his cheeks flushed, and his deep blue eyes regarded her so harshly, as if they'd never shared anything more than a professional relationship. As if he hadn't seen her naked body with those very eyes too many times to count, or traced his fingertips down the soft curves of her skin. As if he hadn't heard her make almost animalistic sounds when they made love, hadn't made her toes curl, or her back arch. As if he'd never even loved her at all.

It was no surprise that she found herself in the grocery store that same evening, staring at a produce display (with no intention of buying any of it) and seeing nothing but Corny. For the first time since their break-up, she genuinely missed him, with no selfish motivation. She just wanted to be able to touch him again, and have him know that she _did _love him, no matter what she had said or done to convince him otherwise.

It _was_ a surprise, however, when she turned from the display and found herself facing the blonde-haired, blue-eyed woman she'd spent the majority of her life attempting to avoid. It had been _years_ since she'd seen her, and part of Amber was glad that time had been well to her mother. That could only mean good things for her own future.

"Mother," the word was a gasp, and Amber wasn't even completely sure she was the one who had said it. She felt breathless suddenly, and stammered. "Oh-oh my God."

Velma's cerulean eyes raked over her, appraising her with an arched golden brow.

"Well. It's certainly been an ample amount of time, hasn't it?" Velma said the words, her voice dripping with what Amber could only assume was pure disdain. "Six years isn't enough time to separate yourself from all of this?"

Amber swallowed, still slightly speechless at the sight of her mother.

"I can't…" She paused, "I came back to Baltimore after college." It wasn't _her_ fault that she hadn't bothered to try and find her. Baltimore had grown immensely in the last few years, and was no longer the city it had been when Amber was in high school.

"Oh, yes," Velma tapped a manicured nail against her pink lips, "The college that you used your trust fund to pay for." She didn't give Amber a chance to speak. "I hear that you have taken over as station manager."

Amber nodded, the roots of defensiveness creeping into her voice suddenly.

"A little over two years now."

"And how has that been going for you?" Velma smirked, "I'm assuming you used your Von Tussle charm to achieve that _position_." There was heavy emphasis on the last word, and Amber furrowed her eyebrows, her fingers curling around the handle of her shopping basket.

"I didn't sleep my way to the top, if that's what you mean." She felt her lips curling into a sneer, "I went to college for a reason, Mother."

"And what reason is that?" Velma's voice had dropped, but she spoke at such a level that could convince anyone she was making no real effort on her part. "You had no real interest in that position. I'm willing to bet you only took it to make that man's life miserable." She was quiet for a moment, "Though I can't entirely say I blame you for that."

_That man_. That was what Corny would be now; not simply to Velma, or others who had no idea she'd been romantically involved with him, but to Amber as well. _That man_ she had used to love, _that man_ that was the father of her child. _That man_ that she had once thought she'd spend the rest of her life with.

"Well, I didn't," Amber shot back, though the words weren't completely true. She could still remember that first day she'd come into the studio; she'd been wearing pink, she remembered that part vividly because once, when she'd been seventeen, Corny had told her that pink made her look like a cupcake with frosting. She'd liked the idea of that; the thought of him licking her in that way, his tongue tracing over her skin. And so, on that day that she'd walked into the studio as the new station manager, she'd worn pink. She doubted Corny had remembered it, either then or now, but she had, and had spent the entire day wondering if he had wanted to taste her. That was one of those random memories that she would have from now on; memories of the way her life had used to be, memories of the man she had once loved.

"It was a career move, Mother, not a personal one." Those words _also_ weren't completely true, though Velma had no way of knowing that.

Velma rolled her eyes.

"Everything is personal with you, Amber, that's your problem. You never quite knew how to separate yourself from your emotions." She raised her eyebrows, lines creasing her forehead, and Amber suddenly noticed her mother's age. Tiny wrinkles sprouted from the corners of her eyes, deep creases marked too many years of frowning. Amber felt her face flush.

"I'm _fine_, Mother," she sneered at her, shifting slightly. Velma's eyes watched her, and Amber could practically feel it; the _exact_ moment that she comprehended that bump beneath her clothing. Velma sucked her breath in, narrowing her dark blue eyes.

"Who did that to you?" Velma demanded suddenly, her voice low and sharp as a razor. Of course, Amber knew the connotation of the words immediately, and felt her eyes beginning to burn with tears as she lowered them to the ground, desperate to look anywhere but the other woman. Amber chewed on her lip, and Velma reached out, her bony fingers wrapping around Amber's thin wrist. "Amber, I demand you to tell me."

Amber's eyes connected with hers for only a moment, and she jerked her wrist away, holding it to her chest.

"Don't touch me. You can't demand _anything_ of me." She shook her head, "You have no control over me anymore." She was silent for a moment, and Velma stood watching her still, her eyes hard and cold. Amber sighed, suddenly defeated. There was no reason to hide it, from her or anyone else. "It's Corny's."

"Jesus, Amber, you let that womanizer impregnate you?" Velma's words were spiteful as she glared hatefully at Amber's stomach.

"Mother, we're engaged!" Obviously, the words slipped out before she had time to think about what she was saying, and she saw Velma's eyes dart to her bare ring finger.

"Nice ring," Velma commented sarcastically, and Amber glared at her, feeling the pinpricks of tears beginning.

"We _were_ engaged," she clarified softly after a moment, "Things didn't work out."

Velma stared at her blankly for a moment, and Amber anticipated her response. She should have known better, but she couldn't stop herself from thinking that maybe Velma would show her some sort of sympathy; just maybe she would offer some sort of long-awaited comfort to her daughter who was now pregnant, yet completely alone.

A smug smirk pressed across Velma's lips, and she shook her head.

"You should have known better than to ever expect anything from that fool, Amber."

Amber felt her cheeks burning with rage at the self-satisfied smirk on Velma's face.

"Shut up," she spit the words back at her, "You have _no idea_ what you're talking about."

Velma caught herself quickly, replacing her sudden surprise with a sneer.

"You think I don't know what happened between him and Brenda, no, _all_ of the council girls, while I was there?" She narrowed her eyes, "You're the only one on the show that he wasn't screwing, Amber. I made damn sure of that." Her shoulders shrugged lightly.

"That is _not_ true," Amber was irate, "Yes, he slept with Brenda, but that was a-"

"A mistake?" Velma took the words from her mouth, "I'll bet it was, now that he's got that obnoxious little brat."

"That obnoxious little _brat_ is my-" Amber cut herself off. Her what? Her ex-fiancé's daughter? Her used-to-be future step-daughter? The words didn't even seem to make sense, and Amber shook her head. "She's not a brat, and Corny's not a womanizer." It was simply a territorial thing now; Amber herself could call Sophie and Corny all the annoying names she wanted, because she knew that deep in her heart, she didn't mean them. When someone else said those words, they struck a wrong chord inside of her.

Velma smirked coolly, tapping her fingernails against her inside of her bare arm.

"You're soft, Amber." Her words were as cold as her glare. "He dumped you, left you pregnant, and you're _still _tripping all over yourself at the thought of him. That's not the girl I raised."

Amber wasn't sure how to respond to her comment, and clenched her jaw. Velma was gone a moment later, and she was fairly certain she wouldn't see her again for a very long time, if ever again. It wasn't until late that evening, when Amber was lying in bed, that she suddenly realized what she should have said in reply to her mother. She should have told her that she _wasn't_ the girl she had raised; should have said that she was not the same person Velma had been at her age, and had no intention of becoming that person.

And last, but certainly not least, she should have told her that she was _not_ soft; she was hopelessly and desperately still in love with Corny.


	16. Foolish

**Thank you for all the reviews, everyone. They mean so much. This is kind of a two-part chapter, the next part will be up soon, I promise.**

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_Well in case you failed to notice,  
In case you failed to see,  
This is my heart bleeding before you,  
This is me down on my knees, and  
These foolish games are tearing me apart,  
And your thoughtless words are breaking my heart_

_"Foolish Games"- Jewel_

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Another week passed before Corny was medically cleared to begin dancing on the show again, though, because of their problems, neither he nor Amber had made contact with the other to set up a date for his official return as host. In this way, she felt in total control of the situation. She literally had his career in the palm of her hand, and she was dangling it over him. She knew that each time she felt his eyes upon her, he was attempting to demand her to speak to him, if only professionally. She got a strange sense of satisfaction from knowing that she was making him squirm, just as he'd done her for all those years. 

Although she had come to terms with the realization that she was still in love with him, it didn't mean that she let herself fall all over him. In fact, it was quite the opposite. When she saw him enter the room, she would become stony-faced and stoic, watching him with hard eyes that she had previously only reserved for mortal enemies. Her assumptions were these: just because she couldn't fool herself into hating him, she could fool _him_ into thinking that she did, and she spent the majority of her time figuring out ways to show how nonchalant she was about their entire situation, even when she was dying on the inside.

Of course, her inability to back down from this charade she was putting on was still spilling over into her personal health. She had taken a sick sense of pride in her ability to go an entire day without eating, and then swallow just enough food to keep her alive until the next morning. She had never made such an attempt to eat so little in her life, and she was positive that she could already feel her stomach beginning to shrink on the inside. She had stopped gaining weight, and had, in fact, begun losing it. She found herself feeling weaker every day, her skin pale and dryer than ever. She tried to ignore the fact that each morning when she woke up, there was a clump of her own golden hair on her pillow, and brushed it away, swallowing the lump in her throat that something may have been seriously wrong. Stupidly, she assumed that this happened to _all_ pregnant women, and that this was nothing out of the ordinary.

She began experiencing dizzy spells, and moved slowly when she was at work to avoid any suspicious glares. She could manage to fake her way through work, and even fooled Link when he continuously asked her what was happening to her. She wasn't completely sure how to answer him, because she didn't _know_ what was happening to her. What _was_ painfully obvious was the fact that her body was weaker, more tired than it had ever been before, and that the slightest bump into any offending obstacle could more than guarantee a huge, ugly bruise on her rough skin. Inwardly, these things that were happening to her body terrified her, though outwardly she would admit to none of that.

It was infuriating to be so desperately close to Corny, and to not be able to touch him. It was the worst kind of torture; worse than when they'd been dating for a few months, and had agreed to wait for their actual _first time_ together. That had lasted for all of about a week, and Amber had ended up begging him to take her at his house one night, long before either of them had thought about engagements or moving in together. No, that had been completely different. Back then, she had known that he was _hers_, and that she could have him at any time she so choose, but now, he was gone. Her hormones were going completely insane, and she found herself thinking about him in _that_ way for the majority of the day. It was excruciating agony to know that she could not use her fingers to tug on his hair the way he had always liked so much, and to know that he was not going to be leaving a trail of gentle kisses down her neck anytime soon. Not that he would want to anyway, now; not with the harsh appearance of her skin. She reminded herself of the crocodile purse her mother had once owned; she felt scaly, and so pale that her skin was actually beginning to look green to her.

She felt another wave of dizziness hit her suddenly, and let her fingers grip the chair in front of her, focusing all of her attention on the rehearsals before her. She was sure Corny had seen that from where he was standing; he had seen the way she had stumbled, if only for a moment, and forced herself to stand up straight, even if her head didn't think it was such a great idea. She stared straight ahead, ignoring the questioning glares that people shot at her over her slight tumble forward. If there was one thing a Von Tussle woman knew how to do, it was hide her pain; this definitely counted as pain.

A hot rush of nausea slipped up her throat, and she felt her face beginning to burn. She was certain she would throw up at that moment, but the sickness was soon replaced with an unfathomable lightheadedness, and she felt her head beginning to droop as the obliviousness rushed over her, sending her onto the floor, crumpled into a useless heap.

She wasn't sure how long she'd been out for; it seemed like only seconds, but so does a full night's sleep, and when her heavy eyelids opened again, there was a small crowd gathered around her, Link and Corny in the forefront. She knew that someone was holding her hand, and didn't realize for another moment that it was Link, stooped beside her with Corny watching from mere feet away.

"Amber…" Link patted the back of her hand gently, and she stirred, garnering just enough strength to pull her hand from his, clutching it to her chest and studying the surrounding group with wide blue eyes. "Are you okay?"

She blinked, then let herself shift enough to look at Corny, who was studying her carefully. She felt ashamed suddenly, but brushed the feeling aside, forcing herself to nod ever so slightly.

"I'm fine," she tried to pull herself up, to stand, but the room began to spin, and she fell back, closing her eyes again.

"Just lay there for a minute," Link instructed her carefully, "Don't try to stand up just yet." She let her head fall back, wishing she could have had this embarrassing fainting spell on a day that Corny _hadn't_ been here to see it. A woman who was in complete control most definitely did not pass out. She let herself lay still for a moment, and heard the scuffle of shoes as people began to walk away from the scene of the accident.

"Amber, look at me." Corny's words were a direct order, but she hesitated to follow them, afraid of what she might see when she did. She kept her eyes closed, and suddenly felt his hand on hers, brushing lightly along her fingers. "_Amber_. Open your eyes and look at me."

She did finally, if only because she was afraid she'd never be able to get up if she didn't. He was crouched beside her, holding a small plate with a sandwich on it, glaring at her harshly.

"Eat this." No questions, no time for excuses. He shoved the sandwich in front of her, moving his hand to put the plate in her grasp. She watched him dumbly for a moment, and he kept his eyes locked on her face. She decided to keep her focus on his eyes, and shook her head slightly, her resolve never wavering.

"No." Her voice was barely above a whisper, and she returned his hard glare.

He looked at her for another minute before pounding his fist on the ground, dangerously close to her body, and she felt her muscles twitch.

"Damnit, Amber!" His voice was so loud that it made the remaining few people who were standing around them start quickly, "What in the _hell_ is wrong with you? What sick, pathetic point are you trying to make by doing this to yourself?"

She wasn't completely sure that she'd ever seen Corny this angry, even when they'd gotten into their many fights. Even when they screamed at each other, she could always see it in his eyes; the love that he undoubtedly felt for her beneath all of the other emotions, but now, it was gone.

"I'm not-" Her voice was small, but she began to speak, only to be cut off by Link, who glared angrily at Corny from across Amber.

"Give her a chance to get her bearings before you start with your psychotic, domineering shit, would you?" Link was sneering at the older man now, his eyes dark. Even Amber, in her half-state of consciousness, could see that he was biting his tongue to avoid saying anything further. Corny's eyes met his at once, and Amber looked between them worriedly.

"Don't tell me how to speak to her," Corny shot back suddenly, his gaze now completely averted from Amber. "I'll say whatever I want to her."

Link met his hard gaze, furrowing his eyebrows.

"I'm sure you will. Your relationship was just about a stone's throw away from being verbally abusive, so why don't you just get the hell away and let her regain consciousness before you start on her?" He shook his head, looking at Amber again. "I've known her longer than you have, anyway." His words were so absurdly childish and random that Amber almost laughed. He said the words grudgingly, keeping his eyes locked on her. She shifted her gaze to Corny, who was still glaring at Link.

"So you think you know her better than I do?" It sounded like he was challenging Link to a game of Amber trivia. "If you know her so well, then do you realize that this precious little flower you're fawning over is starving herself for attention?" His steely gaze moved down to Amber. "She's putting herself _and_ her unborn baby in danger because she's trying to achieve some sick sense of accomplishment. Get up, Amber, and stop being so damn selfish."

Amber groaned from her position on the floor, letting her eyes roll into the back of her head as Link studied Corny. She suddenly wanted nothing _more_ than to get up; to eat that sandwich that Corny had just offered her, but her body was simply not strong enough to pull herself up. Almost as if on cue, Corny's hands were under Amber's arms, urging her onto her feet, pulling her up with his strength. When she did find her feet, she was wobbly and unsure of herself, and gripped the same chair she'd held onto earlier.

"Damnit, leave her the hell alone," Link shoved Corny away from her quickly, causing Amber to stumble slightly from the lack of support.

"Why don't _you_ leave her the hell alone, you jackass?" Corny pushed Link shoulder's back, causing him to stumble, and Amber's eyes widened as she watched them. "You need to stay the hell away from her. Aren't you happy that you've already broken my family up?"

Amber felt tears stinging her eyes as she heard the words. So this was proof; he still thought about them, and he blamed this all on Link, not on her. Although that didn't help much, she found an odd comfort in it.

"You're the one that thinks you _own_ her. She's not your property, you arrogant ass-" He was in Corny's face now, hollering the words at him. In the blink of an eye, Link had taken Corny down with a solid punch in the jaw, and both men were on the floor, tussling with each other in a blur of punches.

"Stop it!" Amber screamed the words so loudly that the place fell into a quiet hush. She didn't care. She was so beyond caring; beyond having people look at her strangely or question her motivations. "Both of you, stop!"

Corny pulled away from Link, shooting him an angry glare before straightening his tie and cufflinks, then directing his gaze at Amber. She felt the flush rising in her face, and narrowed her eyes at him.

"You two are the _reason_ I'm like this!" She screamed the words at them, pointing her finger at Corny. "_You _are the reason I'm pregnant, and _you_," she moved her gaze to Link, "You're despicable. You're the reason I don't have a family, a fiancée, anything." She narrowed her gaze at them as they watched her, both of them flushed and panting from their fight.

"I hate _both_ of you," she spit the words at them, turning on her heels and tossing her clipboard on the floor. "Fuck this, I'm leaving. You can get through today by your damn selves."

She scurried through the studio, despite the fact that her head was still spinning and her heart was still pounding. She managed to drive home, though she wasn't completely sure how, and it wasn't much later, when she was preparing to get into the shower, that she began to experience the lightheadedness again. She gripped the shower curtain, her fingers slipping down it as she fell, her forehead smacking against the edge of the claw-foot tub as she slipped into unconsciousness. She hit the floor, taking the shower curtain down with her, and collapsing into a motionless heap on the cold tile.

For the very first time, Amber Von Tussle was beyond being able to help herself.


	17. Care

**Sorry this chapter took so long to get up! I've been distracted by other things! Hopefully it was worth the wait!**

* * *

_I__'ll be there, but you might not see me  
It's never easy to get through  
But when the laughter dies away,  
I'll take care of you_

"I'll Take Care of You" – The Dixie Chicks

Upon opening her eyes, she immediately realized that she was no longer spread on that cold tile floor, blinking up at the light on her bathroom ceiling. She wasn't stupid or delirious enough to think she was dead, as she'd always heard and seen of reactions in books and movies. If this place was Heaven, she had definitely been mistaken in her adaptation of what she had believed it would be like. There was white, yes, and plenty of it; white walls and floors, blankets and machines. Her head felt heavy, as if there were a pressure pushing on it, crushing it in some cruel vice. She found it difficult to move her arms, and she attempted to shift beneath the blanket, blinking rapidly as she forced herself to adjust to her surroundings.

She had only been in the hospital once before; she'd been brought to the emergency room after that particularly grueling fall from the rocket in the Miss Teenage Hairspray Pageant of '62, when the swelling and pain in her ankle hadn't subsided after a few days. Her mother had been reluctant to take her, of course; Velma had been more concerned with the fact that she was now unemployed than the fact that Amber's ankle was sprained. Still, she had spent only a few hours in the waiting room, then a small office while they wrapped and treated her foot. She had never been in an actual hospital bed, wearing an actual hospital gown, and she wasn't completely sure how she'd ended up here in the first place.

She didn't remember much before she had passed out; though what she did remember made her feel slightly uneasy. She could remember the fight between Corny and Link, and the lightheadedness she'd been experiencing. She could remember running the water for a shower, and never actually getting the chance to step into the stream of water. After that, her mind was blank.

Her fingers fumbled for the small button that she'd always heard about on the edge of her bed; the one that would send nurses and doctors running to her aide, eager to satisfy whatever needs she may have. With a certain sense of accomplishment, she found and pushed it, then waited. She swallowed, looking around her. The clock on the wall told her that it was only quarter after six. That meant she couldn't have been unconscious for more than an hour; she hadn't even gotten home until after four and hadn't prepared for her shower until almost five.

She raised her arm to her head in an attempt to rub away the throbbing headache she suddenly felt, and noticed a long, thin wire running from the inside of her wrist to a machine located just beside her bed and turned, her eyes darkening as she realized what it was. An IV? For what? What, exactly, was wrong with her? She pushed the button again now, desperate for some sort of answer, when she suddenly remembered the fact that had slipped from her mind until now. She was pregnant. Yes, well, she had _been_ pregnant, at least before she'd fallen unconscious. Was she still pregnant?

She hesitated for a moment, then sat back in her bed, her fingers slowly moving the blankets down and over her stomach. The lump was still there, but did that mean anything? Just because there was a bump, did that mean there was anything inside? She felt a thickening in her throat, and for a moment, she found it difficult to breathe. Her face was flushing, and she blinked, her eyes burning suddenly.

"Oh, God…" she heard herself utter the words quietly, her heart pounding in her chest. Had she miscarried? Oh, God, if she had, this would all be her fault. She'd neglected herself for so long and on purpose. Corny would detest her; she would become an unimaginable monster in his eyes, worse than anything Brenda had ever said or done. At least she'd cared enough to take care of her body when she'd been pregnant with Sophie, and Amber couldn't even do that. "Oh God, Amber, what have you done?" Suddenly, it didn't seem to matter that she was speaking to herself, or asking herself questions.

"I don't know, Amber, what _have_ you done?" She heard his voice suddenly and glanced to the doorway, Corny's dark eyes watching her seriously, a cup of coffee in his hand. Sophie watched her nervously from beside him, her fingers curled shyly around his leg.

She almost cried at the sight of them, she was so deliriously happy to see his face again that she tried to free herself from her connection to her IV. Corny quickly realized what she was attempting, and rushed toward her suddenly, his hand reaching out so quickly to stop her that he nearly spilled his coffee.

"Amber, no! Stay there!" His voice was harsh and deep and Amber stopped suddenly, looking up at him unsurely with wide eyes, but pausing in her movements. He sighed softly, and Sophie began to enter the room when a nurse hurried past her and into the room, moving to Amber's bedside. She moved toward the bed without speaking, turned the alert button off and stepped aside, looking between Amber and Corny guardedly.

"Do you need something?" Her voice was cold, and not at all what Amber had expected from her. It was slightly unnerving to know that she had been in the charge of such an uncaring woman while she'd been unconscious.

"Uh, I-" She tried to speak, but her mouth was dry, and she couldn't find the words. In turn, the nurse looked expectantly at Corny.

"Could you get her some water, please?" He asked softly, then caught her gently by the arm as she turned to go, "And, do you know, is dinner going to be served soon?"

"Six-thirty," the woman replied dryly, and Corny nodded, glancing over at Amber affirmatively. Amber watched him as the nurse left, and he turned to her.

"Dinner?" She asked him stupidly.

"You're going to eat, Amber. I'm going to stay here to see that you do."

She shook her head slowly, her eyes falling over Sophie before moving back to Corny.

"Why…how long do I have to be here?" She looked to him for her answer.

He watched her seriously for a moment, then clenched his jaw.

"I don't know," he answered her after a moment, "You're dehydrated, and you can't leave until you get some of those essential nutrients back into your system."

Sophie moved to stand beside him, and the nurse returned a moment later with a Styrofoam pitcher of water and promise of dinner in ten. When she had gone, Sophie moved to sit in Corny's lap, her wide dark eyes still focused on Amber.

"Dehydrated?" She felt herself laughing a little, to which Corny responded by narrowing his eyes at her. "Don't you think all of this is a little extreme for dehydration?" She had been dehydrated before; a few times, in fact, and had never wound up in the hospital. She'd simply been told to drink liquids, and avoid strenuous physical activity. They'd never gone as far as to hook her up to an IV and keep her in bed, much less a _hospital_ bed.

Corny scowled at her, shaking her head.

"Amber, you are almost four months pregnant, dehydration is very serious."

"What?" She sputtered for a moment, "I'm still pregnant?"

"Only by the grace of God," he spit the words back at her, "Do you realize that you are underweight, not for a pregnant woman, but a _not_ pregnant woman of your height and size? God, Amber."

"What?" She answered, almost defensively, "I can't help if I don't want to eat, I-"

"You're lying!" He was closer to her bed now, "You _do_ want to eat, you just _won't_. Well, you know what? You see those little tubes poking out your arms? They're giving you all those little nutrients that you seem to be so determined to get rid of, and you're staying in that damn bed until you get some common sense and realize that for _once_, you need to be worried about more than yourself."

Amber watched him speechlessly, blinking.

"God only knows what would have happened if I hadn't found you. If you'd fallen on that floor just a little differently, you probably would have lost the baby _and_ killed yourself." He clenched his jaw, averting his eyes from her for a moment. "I have _never_ in my life met anyone as selfish as you are, Amber Von Tussle."

She half expected Sophie to chime in with her two-cents at this point, and even looked expectantly at her, Amber's face burning with the sudden chastising she'd just taken from Corny.

"And you're not going back to that apartment," he told her suddenly, his voice loud and clear. Amber's mouth fell open slightly, looking at him indignantly.

"Where am I-"

"Because you don't see the necessity in taking care of yourself, I'm going to have to _babysit_ you. I think Sophie could care for herself better than you've been doing. You're staying at the house so that I can make sure you don't try and kill yourself again." The nurse was in the room a moment later, uncovering a plastic tray filled with food that Amber couldn't specifically identify by smell or appearance, and left soundlessly, leaving the three of them in the aftermath of Corny's words. "Now eat your dinner."

Amber looked from the tray to Corny, her eyebrows furrowing slightly.

"I'm not staying at your house," she defied him quietly, and his eyes flashed dark as he looked at her.

"Yes, you are," he tested her, saying the words as eerily calm as he could manage, "And I'm not fighting you on this. Eat your food, or I will feed you like a child."

She glared at him for another moment, her jaw trembling as she curled the fork in her fingers, jabbing it defiantly into a small pile of mashed potatoes that still held their scoop-form. She glared at the offending food, narrowing her eyes. She felt the back of her throat burning and looked away from the food, shaking her head.

"I can't."

"Amber Von Tussle." He said each part of her name as if it were its own word, and her gaze caught on him. "Not only are you _dehydrated_, you are also _malnourished_. You-"

"Wait, what?" She asked suddenly, shaking her head, "Malnourished?"

"Yes, malnourished. You have deprived yourself of food for so long that your body has actually started to shut down on you." He sent her a hard gaze, "That's why you've been fainting. What else has been happening that you didn't tell me about?"

She pursed her lips together tightly, letting her eyes catch on the food in the tray below her. She couldn't tell him about her hair falling out, or the bruises she'd been garnering as if they were some sort of morbid trophies. He would only hate her further, so she shook her head.

"I don't know. I guess I wasn't paying attention."

She expected something different from him; expected him to chastise her or call her ignorant or selfish again. Instead, he moved a chair closer to the hospital bed, gently took the fork from her hand and dipped it into the mashed potatoes, pushing them gently to her dry, cracked lips.

"Open," he instructed her gently, and their eyes connected over the fork. Amber felt her face burning pink with the sudden mortification of being force-fed by her ex-fiancée, and kept her lips pursed together tightly before studying the pain in his face. Slowly, her lips parted, and he slid the fork inside. The food tasted almost foreign to her, and she swallowed the potatoes in a hard lump before he had more on the fork, pressing it to her mouth again. "This is what is going to happen," he told her gently, as he gathered some meat onto the fork and pressed it to her lips. "If I have to feed you, I will."

She swallowed her food, then received another bite. She had the strength now; she could have easily reached out and taken that fork from him if she wanted to. The truth was, she didn't want to.

"Why do you even care?" She found herself asking, somewhat foolishly after he had fed her half of what was on the tray. "I'm your ex now, remember? Aren't you supposed to be happy when bad things happen to me?"

He clenched his jaw and spooned some jell-o into her mouth.

"I'd never be happy to see bad things happen to you, Amber." He kept his eyes averted from her as he spoke, his voice low and sturdy. "Besides, you're carrying my baby."

His words hit her suddenly and tears filled her eyes. She looked away from him and the fork, blinking away the sudden proof of weakness.

"You finally believe me, that it's yours?" She asked, her face hot.

"I always believed you," he told her, his eyes connecting with hers pointedly. "People say and do a lot of things when they're mad, Amber. Usually, they work through those things at a later point in time." His eyes darted to Amber's bare ring finger, and he licked his lips before pushing the chair back and pulling the tray away from her. "That's enough for right now. I don't want you to overdo it and get sick."

"But I'm still hungry." She said the words, though she didn't mean them entirely. She _was_ hungry, though not for any type of food; she was hungry for Corny, for his touch, and his love. She was hungry for the man she hated dated for two years, the man she had planned to marry before everything in her life went horribly awry.

His eyebrows raised a little, and he caught her gaze.

"Really? Well that's good, Amber. That's really good. I'll run to the gift-shop downstairs and get you some candy, what do you want?" He seemed so excited suddenly that Amber didn't have the heart to tell him she wasn't _actually_ hungry, and he was gone a moment later, candy orders in hand. Sophie shifted uncomfortably against the wall on the other side of the room, still watching Amber with dark eyes. Slowly, she began to move forward, and she stood bedside suddenly, her fingers lightly tracing over Amber's arm.

"Are you really sick, Amber?" Her voice was small and soft; tinier than Amber had ever remembered it before.

"Ah," Amber sighed, narrowing her eyes at the tubes running from her and connecting to machines, "I think so."

"Are you going to get better?" She asked, after a moment.

Amber nodded slightly.

"Yeah, I'll get better." She was quiet for a moment, then Sophie moved, slipping her small hand between Amber's curled fingers, her fingernails lightly scratching Amber's palm.

"I'm sorry," Sophie admitted lightly, letting her head rest on Amber's leg. "I shouldn't have called you all those mean things. Daddy yelled at them for me after you left."

"He did?" This was news to her; she assumed they would have taken turns seeing who could call her worse names. No, did she really think that? Did she actually think Corny would do that? Amber herself, yes, she would do that sort of childish thing, but Corny would not.

"Yeah," Sophie nodded a little. Her voice lowered, and her head raised a little, looking at Amber's face. "Are you coming back to live with us now?"

"I…don't know," she answered honestly. Had he been serious about that? Wasn't it awkward enough to _work_ with her ex-fiancee than to live with him?

"I think you should," she confided in her softly, "Because Daddy doesn't know how to cook very good, and he doesn't know how to help with my math homework as good as you do." She was quiet for a moment, Amber's eyes watching her, "Oh, and, don't tell him I told you, but he still wants to be going out with you, I think."

"What?" Amber's eyes widened. Sophie nodded dutifully.

"He makes me say prayers for you every single night, even when I didn't want to because I was mad at you," she told her solemnly, "and one time, when I asked him why I had to do that, he said 'Because Amber is still part of our family, and she always will be'. And I didn't think that made very much sense since you're _not_ part of our family anymore, so I asked him if he still was in love with you, and you know what he said?"

Amber dipped her head a little, desperate to catch every word of this latest newsbreak.

"What?" Her mouth was dry, and she curled her fingers tightly around Sophie's small hand.

"He said, 'Amber gave us some very happy memories. I'm always going to love her, and you should, too.'" Sophie raised her eyebrows pointedly at Amber, whose postured sunk a little. That wasn't exactly the kind of confession she'd been hoping for, or the kind of love she'd been wanting. That was the necessary tolerable type of love that came with break-ups. That wasn't 'I can't live without you' type of love. That was, 'I can live without you and I'm going to'. She sat back against her pillows silently, her eyes focused on the blankets on her lap. Sophie sat quietly for a moment, and then tilted her head to look at Amber.

"Are you tired?" Amber could do little more than nod, and Sophie patted the back of her hand. "Okay. Let me tell you a story. Close your eyes."

Amber did as she was told and Sophie began to speak of princesses in towers, handsome princes, evil queens. Amber felt her body beginning to succumb to sleep, and suddenly, in the back of her mind, she regretted not telling Sophie bedtime stories all those nights she'd had the chance to. She suddenly regretted not being able to be a mother to her when she'd had the opportunity right in front of her.

Sophie's words lulled her into sleep, before Corny ever returned with her candy, and before Amber ever heard the words "Happily Ever After."


	18. Gone

**We're in the homestretch now! Only a few more chapters to go! Then what will I write?? I'll figure it out, I suppose. Sorry this took so long to post when I promised it would be up a few days ago. I just wanted to make sure I got it right.**

* * *

Get off of your knees, get out of my face  
Get out of my sleep, get out of my space  
How long do I have to show and tell, scream and yell  
Get over yourself

"Get Over Yourself"-SheDaisy.

* * *

Amber had been forced to stay in the hospital for several days, and when she had finally been cleared for release, Corny had been right there, helping her to his car, and then back to the house. He had been watching her like a hawk since then, even at work, to make sure she had begun eating regularly, and for the first time in a long time, she began to make a real effort to care for herself. That wasn't to say she didn't still get ill, or that the road to recovery wasn't extremely bumpy, but it was a start, and that was really all she could manage right now.

He insisted that she move back in, if only temporarily, and even though it was the closest she'd been to him since their break up, nothing could have been further from any type of a relationship between them. They slept in different beds, stayed in different rooms. Corny insisted that she join them for meals at the table, and that was basically as far as their communication went. She was no longer bitter or angry; more than anything, she was lonely, and terrified of what would happen once she _did_ have the baby. Would he try to gain full custody of the child? She couldn't say she would completely blame him if he attempted to; she'd put her and the baby's lives in danger more times than she could count, and for what? Some sick sort of revenge for _her_ ending their engagement over the fact that _she_ had kissed another man? And if he _did_ gain full custody, what would become of her? Every day at work, she'd be forced to see the man that she knew was raising her child. It would be awful; worse than Chinese water torture.

There was no rest between them; Corny didn't come into the room she slept in at night and speak to her in a soft, warm voice. He didn't try to touch her belly, or speak to the baby inside, the way she'd always seen happy couples do. He regarded her with kinder eyes now that she was eating and taking care of herself, but made no attempt to touch her, or reach out for her. It was as if, by some miracle, he'd impregnated her without even touching her, and they had never had any type of intimate relationship to begin with. Even Sophie noticed the difference in the atmosphere, and no longer made random jokes during meals. She sat quietly chewing her food, waiting to be excused so that she could escape from the palpable tension that the pair of them had created.

"This isn't what I thought it would be like when you came back to live with us," Sophie admitted quietly at dinner one evening, and Amber had swallowed hard, keeping her eyes averted from Corny's.

"Me either," Amber had confessed softly, gripping her fork in her hand. And the truth was if she had _known_ it would be so awkward between all of them, she would have fought him harder about moving back in. Amber had merely been looking for company, anything to keep her from being so desperately alone at home, and here, that loneliness was multiplied tenfold. It was as if there were a great distance between them, when all that really separated them were some paper thin walls that Sophie had once, foolishly, been able to hear their love-making through. The thought of it was more than mortifying.

Still, as Amber lay in her room at night, only yards from Corny and the room they had once shared, she couldn't help but wonder if he still thought about them. If, every night when he crawled between those sheets, he thought about when her body had been next to his, curled against him. She wondered if he thought about the time when Sophie had spent the weekend at a friend's house, and they hadn't gotten out of that bed all day. They had both been exhausted, breathless, but refused to get up. It had been heaven right there, in his arms, and she had always cherished that memory; the fact that he wanted her so desperately that he didn't want to get out of bed. Now, she was a stranger in his home.

It happened on a day that she left work early; though she was taking better care of herself, she often got massive head and body aches from the self-deprivation techniques she'd been employing. Corny had been worried, though not overly concerned, but she convinced him that she needed to return to the house, alone or not. Because she had been complying with his demands to take care, he finally agreed and she headed to the house.

She had been on her way from a hot shower to her bedroom to rest when the knock came at the door. She padded to the door and pulled it open, blinking as she saw him again.

"Link." She swallowed, keeping her eyes focused on him and clutching her robe tighter around her, "What do you want?"

As much as it pained her, she was through being courteous to him. He had taken what had been a relatively perfect life, and had damaged it beyond repair. That was something she could never quite forgive him for, no matter the years of history between them.

"I came to check on you," he took the liberty of stepping into the house, raising his eyebrows expectedly at her, "I just wanted to make sure you're okay." He paused, "You okay?"

She nodded slightly, her eyes locked on his face.

"Yes," she responded dryly, doing her best to force him out the door without actually _saying_ the words. "I'm fine, Link." _You can go now_, she wanted to say, _for good_.

He studied her for a moment, edging his way in until he was completely inside the house, standing mere inches from her. She studied him for a moment, her eyes pale and narrowed. She turned away from him, still clutching her robe, and felt his fingers land on the crook of her elbow.

"Are you sure?"

She couldn't tell if it was the question, or the way he felt he had the right to _touch_ her at all that suddenly hit her, but she felt her face flush and she spun on her heels, glaring at him before jerking her arm out of his touch.

"What are you, a broken record?" She hissed the words at him, and his blue eyes darkened, "Damnit, Link, how many times do I have to tell you I'm _fine_ before you start believing me?"

"I'll _believe_ you when you start telling me the truth," he shot back, catching her wrist with his fingers. She stopped, letting her eyes fall down to their point of contact before glaring back up at him.

"Let go of me," she whispered each word as a threat, and he kept her gaze before finally dropping her wrist, then crossing his arms over his chest. "You need to leave right now."

He made no effort to move, and instead tilted his head to the side.

"Are you sleeping with him again?" He demanded the words, his voice hard. She squinted her eyes at him, her lips parting slightly in shock before answering.

"What? No, you have _no_ right to ask me anything like that. You're not my keeper."

"Oh, that's right, I'm _not_ Corny," he rolled his eyes stupidly at her, "How could I have forgotten I'm not the middle-aged man that keeps you tied up like a dog?"

She groaned loudly, taking a step away from him.

"What exactly do you want from me? What do you want me to say? I'm so damn tired of playing this game with you." She crossed her arms over her chest tightly, still watching him, "What in the _hell_ are you trying to get from me?"

He was quiet for a moment, then let his tongue dart out to wet his lips before taking a small step towards her.

"I want you to tell me that he is _not_ what you want," he said quietly and honestly, keeping her gaze.

She narrowed her eyes at him, swallowing hard.

"No," she refused.

He tightened his jaw, jiggling his foot against the floor for a moment before letting his eyes graze the ceiling and looking back down at her. Obviously, that wasn't what he had wanted to hear.

"God, how can you…" he shook his head before looking at her, "Come on, Amber, after everything you've accomplished in your life, and everything you've worked for, do you really want the little house with the white picket fence and kids in the yard?"

And then, as if she hadn't been having this internal struggle for the past few months, it was clear. Clearer than she'd ever realized it could be. Her entire life, everything she _had_ worked for; it had all been in vain until she'd come back to Baltimore after college. She'd spent the majority of her life vowing never to fall in love, never to have a family, and when those things took her by surprise, she hadn't really had a chance to protest. It was difficult to explain, but from the moment she'd seen Corny at that studio when she'd walked in as station manager, she had known that he would be the one to break her of her ways. He didn't know it, of course, but she had enjoyed her bachelorette ways just as much as he had enjoyed his days of freedom before Sophie. In turn, and for his daughter, Corny had demanded that his relationship with Amber be stable and healthy, and so perhaps, in a way, it was Sophie who had broken both of them.

"Yes," she found her voice after a moment, almost astonished that it all suddenly made sense, "Yes, I do."

His eyes were dark and narrow suddenly, and he frowned at her.

"You're not the same girl I thought you were." He made no effort to move.

"Yeah, well, you're not the same, either," she shot back, "God, Link, when we were teenagers, you used to be a little vain and selfish without really ever hurting anyone else, and now you're a bulldozer; you destroy everything that everyone else has built up, simply for your own personal amusement."

"Oh, you'd like to think that, wouldn't you?" He glared at her, "You'd love to be able to blame all of your personal problems on me, and that's _pathetic_, Amber. Don't pretend that your life was picture-perfect before I got here. That's just like you, to blame all of your problems on other people."

She scoffed suddenly, her pink lips slipping open as she glared at him.

"You're kidding me, right?" She stared dumbly at him, "I don't know _why_ you decided to breeze back into town at the exact moment you did, but let me tell you this." She took a step closer to him, poking her fingernail into his chest, "Your coming back here was a cataclysm." She narrowed her steely gaze at him, "Out of everything I've been through, seeing you again was the single worst thing that has _ever_ happened to me."

He narrowed his gaze at her, his hand moving up quickly to grab her hand, capturing her fingers in a tight hold.

"You're a brat," he sneered at her, "I don't know why I ever wanted you. Any man that has to put up with you sure has a pain in his ass."

She gasped, taking in a sharp breath.

"Screw you, Link."

He smirked at her, "You would have. You know it. You would have that night at your apartment, if Corny hadn't shown up at the door." He was still gripping her fingers, tighter now, still watching her with that dark look in his eyes.

"That is _not_ true, you arrogant bastard." With her words, she tried to pull her hand from his grasp, though her struggle was in vain. He held her tighter, then pulled her to his chest in a quick motion, his hands moving to the sides of her face, holding her head still. Before she had a moment to realize what was happening, his lips were pushed against hers, one hand still holding her head, forcing her to remain still while his tongue began to search her mouth. His other hand had begun to dip lower and she felt his fingers brush the skin just beneath her silky robe. She let out a groan of protest before mustering all of her strength to push him away, her blue eyes shining with anger as he stumbled back.

"Don't _touch_ me!" She screamed the words at him, her face burning in mortification and shame, "You son of a-"

"Bitch," he spat the word at her, and before she could catch herself, her hand was up, her fingers splayed across his cheek in a swift motion. He grabbed his face instinctively, scowling at her.

"Don't talk to me like that," she sneered at him, and he smirked.

"What are you going to do, princess? Fire me?" He was watching her with a self-satisfied grin on his face, and at his words, she knew there was nothing else she _could_ do. It made perfect sense. She had created this problem with him, and she would be the one to destroy it.

"Actually," she let the word slip from her mouth, as easily as if it had been her own idea, "Yes. I am."

The smug smirk faded from his lips, and he kept his eyes locked on hers. She kept her lips pursed together, crossing her arms over her chest. He glared at her.

"No you're not," he shook his head slowly, though she wasn't quite sure if he was trying to convince her or himself. "Amber, you don't have to do that. I have done _nothing_ to be fired for!"

She took a step back from him, her eyes widening.

"Oh, right. Okay, well, then, I'll let you pick which reason I should fire you for. Let's see…we have the fact that you kissed me _against_ my will, called me a bitch-"

"You kissed me, too," he stepped closer to her, his eyes dark and narrow, "How quickly you forget all the stupid ass mistakes you make."

"I could cite you for sexual harassment," she shot back at him, and he scoffed.

"I could have you fired for the _exact_ same thing, you prima donna. It would be my word against yours, and the entire city of Baltimore knows the kind of person you are. They were around when you were a teenager, Amber, don't think that you've fooled everyone with this little reformation of yours."

Her eyes narrowed at him. That thought hadn't occurred to her; technically, he _could_ claim sexual harassment against her. She had, after all, kissed him, and he was manipulative enough to make people think she had forced him to return her affections. She couldn't, however, dwell on that now. She was far too angry to think rationally, and gritted her teeth, glaring at him.

"I said _get out. _You're fired."

He watched her again, shaking his head at her.

"Your ratings will plummet."

"I don't care," she clutched her robe again, her face burning in anger and mortification. "If I have to tell you again, I will not hesitate to get the police involved. Now get out of this house, and get out of my life."

He stood staring her down before finally waving a hand dismissively at her and turning to go.

"You're not even worth it, Amber." He kept his eyes focused on her, his feet carrying him toward the door. As he reached for the door, it opened and Sophie rushed in, nearly colliding with him. She stopped, glanced up at him, and furrowed her eyebrows. Link pushed past her wordlessly and onto the porch, nearly knocking Corny over in his hurry. Amber moved quickly, slamming the screen door behind Link as he and Corny made eye contact.

"You know, I feel sorry for you," he glared at him, "Because she can't accept the fact that even _you _don't want her anymore."

They stood silently, watching as Link made his way from the house, Amber clenching her teeth, her fingers still gripping the screen door handle tightly.

"Where's Link going?" Sophie asked, coming to stand beside Amber, her hands linked in the straps of her backpack. Amber stood watching the dim reflection of the glass, then took a step back.

"He's just going." It was all that was really necessary to say.

She let her eyes graze Corny's, and he finally made a motion to step into the house, joining her and Sophie.

"Is he coming back?" Sophie's eyes were still following Link's long-gone shadow.

"I hope not." It was all Amber could really manage before turning, forcing her feet to carry her back to her bedroom, and pausing before she went inside. She walked back into the living room, where Corny and Sophie were still standing, unsure of what had just transpired before their arrival.

"You've got your job back," she told him flatly, her eyes cold and dark, before returning to her bedroom and shutting the door behind her. Her head was aching worse than before, her stomach churning, though only for one reason. She had been aware of her stupid mistakes all along, but she had finally realized that only _she_ was the one to blame for them, and there was no fixing them. Link was right about that; not even Corny, the one person who had always managed to be able deal with her, wanted to be around her. She was only here because of his concern for their baby.

She crawled into her bed, the silk of her robe brushing against her skin, and closed her eyes. She heard the clatter of pans in the kitchen, and knew that Corny was preparing dinner. She hoped he didn't force her to eat with them tonight, and part of her knew that he wouldn't, if only because he was still trying to figure out what had gone on between the two of them.

Her mind was spinning with thoughts, but she had nearly begun to drift to sleep when she heard Sophie's voice, tiny and far away, though only mere feet from where she rested.

"Daddy, do you love Amber more now? Since she gave you your job back?"

The question was so ridiculously blunt and unapologetic that Amber scoffed loudly, the sick feeling in the pit of her stomach increasing as she shifted, burying her head in the pillow and pulling the blankets over her head.

She was too afraid to listen for Corny's reply to the question.


	19. First Time

Hey all! We're almost done, so I need to think of a new story and quick!

* * *

_Maybe I'm wrong,  
But I'm feeling right where I belong  
With you tonight  
Like being in love  
To feel for the first time_

_"First Time"- Lifehouse_

* * *

"So, what's your favorite food, Amber?" Sophie was posed in front of the blonde woman, a small notebook in one hand and a pen in the other. Sophie watched her guardedly, her brown eyes flashing as Amber stared back at her.

"What?" She asked. Of course she'd heard the question, she simply didn't understand why Sophie wanted to know so badly. The child had spent the last two days running around the house, scribbling in that damn notebook. Amber hesitated, "What are you doing all this for, again?"

Sophie sighed exasperatedly, dropping her hands to her side.

"I told you, it's a school project. We have to find out as much about the people living in our house as we can." She raised her notebook again, watching her. Amber arched an eyebrow at her.

"Uh, okay. Well, I guess my favorite food is spaghetti." She answered casually, then glanced back down at the magazine she'd been reading.

"Spa-ghe-tti," Sophie sounded out each syllable, scribbling it down before glancing back up, "Okay. What's your favorite flower?"

Amber glanced up again, her eyes studying Sophie's expectant face.

"Flower?" She asked, blinking. Sophie nodded slowly.

"Yes, flower. What's your favorite?"

Amber's mind reeled. That word alone always reminded her of the first date she and Corny had gone on; when they'd taken Sophie to the zoo. They had picked her up at her apartment, and he had handed her a bouquet of white lilies. They had been fresh and she'd placed them in a vase of water; by the time she'd returned home later that evening, the entire apartment had smelled of them. She'd gone to sleep that night thinking of those white lilies, and knowing that each time she thought of _them_, she would think of Corny, and all the happiness he had brought her from that very moment.

"Lilies," she answered after a brief pause, "Lilies are my favorite flower."

Sophie, of course, did not remember the lilies. She had been five years old at the time, and surely didn't understand the significance of those flowers. She remembered the monkeys in their cages, eating cotton candy until she'd been sick at her stomach, but she didn't remember those lilies. Sophie scribbled the word, then nodded affirmatively.

"Okay," she sighed nonchalantly, then glanced up at Amber. "Hey, don't you have a doctor's appointment today?" She scrunched her small nose up, "Do you finally get to find out if the baby is a boy or a girl?"

Amber glanced toward the clock, suddenly hurried, and nodded.

"Yes, and I'd better go, I almost forgot about that." She stood and rushed into the living room, grabbing her purse from a chair and throwing it over her shoulder. "Tell your daddy I'm leaving, okay?"

"Okay!" Sophie called back, watching her and waving as she pushed her way out of the house and onto the front porch, then the hallway. "Be safe!"

Amber smiled softly at her as she got into the car, her belly nearly brushing the steering wheel.

"Be safe," Amber repeated softly, watching the child.

Amber hated visiting the doctor. She was no longer resentful of the child growing inside of her; that wasn't it at all. Now, more than anything, she just hated waiting. Waiting to get into the office, waiting for the doctor to join her in the room. Waiting to hear if the baby was healthy, waiting, waiting, waiting. Waiting for the baby to be born, waiting to take it home from the hospital, waiting to be a single mother. It was all beyond comprehension for her.

It wasn't beyond unbearable waiting alone, though. The other women in the waiting room with her had husbands who worked, and so Amber would pretend she was in the same boat as they were. They all knew her, of course; she was somewhat of a celebrity in their hometown, after all, and they knew that she had been engaged to Corny. And so, out of ease or necessity, she let them believe that she still _was_, and none of them were any the wiser for it.

The doctor had been concerned for her health, of course. He was worried about the fact that she'd starved herself for quite some time, and amniocentesis had been necessary to determine the baby's health and gender. She hung her head, immensely guilty as she felt the needle slipping into her skin. This would, of course, not be necessary if it hadn't been for her selfishness, though there was nothing she could do about that now. It felt cold and sharp inside of her and she held her breath, attempting to keep as still as possible so that the needle would not slip and puncture any part of her it wasn't meant to. She closed her eyes then, her fingers curling into tight fists as she suddenly wished that there was someone here with her, to hold her hand.

It wasn't until she was driving home from her appointment that she let her mind begin to run through names for this baby; _girl_ names. She couldn't exactly say why, but there was an overwhelming feeling inside of her that this baby was a girl. She wouldn't find out for a few days yet, but she didn't need any proof to be sure about this. She was going to have a daughter; she was sure of that. _Anna, Elizabeth, Christine_. No, none of those names were special enough. They were beautiful, certainly, but they were not enough for this baby. Those names were not big enough to express Amber's feelings for it. They were not enough to suit this child; this child that had literally changed every aspect of her life. Amber needed a man that meant something; one that would withstand the many hard times that she was sure laid ahead of them.

She smelled it as soon as she walked into the front door of the house, and the stinging memory brought tears to her eyes. Lilies. She would recognize that scent anywhere; she'd pressed one of the flowers in that bouquet Corny had given her, and even after its petals had dried, she would still open that book of memories she'd saved it in, and she would smell it. This house definitely smelled of lilies, but there was something else; another scent that seemed to be battling against the flowers to take over. She sniffed again, allowing her purse to fall onto the couch. It was…_tomato sauce_?

She pushed through the living room and into the empty kitchen, then through another door and into the dining room. Sophie was standing quietly beside the table, folding a napkin, her eyes focused on the white linen tablecloth.

"What's going on?" Amber wondered the words and Sophie turned suddenly, her eyes lighting up, a grin playing across her features.

"Oh, good, you're home!" She rushed toward her suddenly, grabbing for her hand and pulling her towards the table, nearly pushing her into the empty chair. "Sit. I'll be right back."

Amber sat as she was told, her eyes falling across the table. A bowl of spaghetti sat in the middle of the table, surrounded by unlit candles and, just as she'd assumed, a vase of white lilies. Amber felt her face flush as she studied the empty chair across from her. Oh, no. What had Sophie done? This could only possibly mean one thing.

"Daddy's here!" Sophie called joyfully, pushing him into the room and into his chair, taking a step back and grinning at them as they sat watching her dumbly. Sophie placed her hands on her hips, looking between them. "I didn't light the candles, because I'm not allowed to play with matches." She looked pointedly at Corny, then apologetically at Amber. "And I'm sorry I lied about asking you questions for school. I just had to do _something_, though."

"You did this?" Corny asked, somewhat incredulously, "What about the food? You're not allowed to cook."

"I didn't!" Her eyes grew wide, "Miss Maybelle helped. She helped me with the flowers, too." She pursed her lips together, watching them. "And I'm going to my room. Be nice to each other. Daddy, ask her about the baby. Amber, don't talk about you-know-who." She was gone a moment later, leaving them in a rather stricken silence, Amber staring down at the empty dish in front of her. She clenched her hands into nervous fists on her lap, her face flushed and warm.

"I didn't know this was what she was doing," Corny explained, almost apologetically, and Amber shook her head.

"No, no. It's fine." She swallowed hard, then finally allowed herself to look towards him. "I think she's too smart for her own good."

He nodded, forcing himself to chuckle softly.

"Yeah, I think that's a safe assumption." He cleared his throat, then reached toward the bowl of spaghetti between them, "Here, have some." She shifted slightly, allowing him to dish some noodles onto her plate before giving himself some. She swallowed again, then forced herself to pick up her fork, twirling the noodles around its prongs aimlessly.

"She's tired of us fighting, isn't she?" Amber asked. The words were stupid; of course she was. For as long as Sophie could remember, they'd been at each other's throats, though usually, there had been a different type of passion between them.

"Ah," he sighed after a moment, his eyes brushing the table before moving to look up at her, "I think it's more that she's tired of us being indifferent."

There was silence between them for a moment, and Amber felt herself beginning to cave. She wanted to tell him that she missed him; was miserable without him. She wanted him to know that she wanted him back, that she wanted to be allowed back into his bed. She wanted him to kiss and rub her swollen belly, wanted to know that she would still be loved when she was through carrying his child. She opened her mouth to speak.

"Listen, Amber." It was a good thing that he cut her off. Her words would have been jumbled and misunderstood; she was no good at saying the things that needed to be said. "I think we need to talk."

Of course they needed to talk. She swallowed hard, nodding a little, her blue eyes hooked on his.

"Okay." Her voice was small and frightened. "Yeah, me too."

He smiled at her softly for a moment, and her heart picked up speed. Her stomach fluttered, and if only for a moment, she assumed it was nothing more than butterflies. Even now, after all these years, he could give her butterflies, even without meaning to. She tilted her head slightly to look at him, and her stomach fluttered again. She pushed back from her chair suddenly, her eyes dropping to her stomach, her hands instinctively curling around the bump there.

"Oh my God!" Her voice was high and shrill, and Corny's eyes widened, pushing his chair back in a panic, watching her unexpectedly.

"What?" His voice was worried, "What is it, Amber? What's wrong?"

She pressed her fingers to a spot in the lower part of her abdomen, then felt a rush of heat to her face. Her lips curled into a smile, and she glanced up at him, grinning wildly.

"It kicked, Corny. The baby is kicking."

A flustered grin spread across his lips and he took a step forward before pausing, watching her unsurely. She watched his fingers curl into fists, and let her eyes raise to meet his.

"Come feel it. Please." Her words were more than an invitation to press his fingers along the curves of her belly; they were asking him to love her again. He was however, she assumed, too excited, too caught up in the moment to realize the double meaning of her words, and he was beside her in a moment. She reached out for his familiar hand, curling it in her fingers and holding it just a moment too long before directing his touch to the spot on her belly, pressing two fingers gently against the area. It was another moment, both of their hands pressed against her stomach, her eyes watching his face, before there was another ripple below the skin. His eyes lit up suddenly, and she felt laughter rippling through her at the sensation.

"That's amazing," he smiled at her, his fingers not moving from the spot, "How long has this been going on for?"

She pressed her lips together in a light smile, rather reluctant to allow him to move his hand from her skin. She felt breathless suddenly, almost giddy in her excited state.

"This is the first time," she told him honestly, nodding quickly, "The very first time."

She continued to hold his fingers in their place for another few moments, but the movements had ceased. He pulled his hand away, almost reluctantly, but stayed close to her. He was bent over her now, almost kneeling, but not quite. Her eyes brushed his lips, and she swallowed, attempting to avert her eyes, but there was no use. No, she could not deny this moment. She could not pass this opportunity to do what she'd wanted to do for so long, and so, without hesitation, her hands slipped up, cupping his face and pulling him to her, kissing him gently and without any of the awkwardness that had surrounded them for so long. She covered his lips, closing her eyes and sighing, knowing that this was how it was supposed to be between them. There was not meant to be space between them, or hostility or anger. Her lips were supposed to be against his, his fingers running through her hair. Still, at this moment, his hands rested motionlessly against the side of her chair, holding himself up as she kissed him. He was making no movement to pull away, or to stop her, but at the same time, he wasn't returning the kiss.

She paused, taking a breath, pulling her face slightly away from his, letting her eyes raise guiltily to meet his. He sucked his lower lip in, digging his front teeth into it before taking a slight step backwards.

"You were the one who ended us, Amber," his voice came out of the silence after a moment.

"I know," she answered him quietly, still looking at him, "but maybe I made a mistake." There was no doubt in her mind that she had, but she had thrown that in for Corny's sake, just in case he _didn't_ think it was a mistake.

His eyes were locked on hers, but his blink broke their contact and he averted his gaze from her.

"Maybe isn't really good enough for me," his words were soft and low, not sarcastic or mocking. He stood for a moment before returning to his seat across the table from her casually, as if nothing had just occurred between them. He let himself twirl the spaghetti on his fork, then looked up at her again, meeting her questioning gaze. Slowly, he slipped his hand across the table the table, palm up, toward her. She watched his hand, his long, thin fingers reaching out for her, and smiled gently, slipping her hand over his, their fingers resting perfectly against each other.

"Let me know when there's no more _maybe_ in that head of yours, okay?" He smiled gently at her, and she felt her face blush.

There _was_ no more maybe in her head, but she knew what he was asking. He wanted her to wait, wanted to make sure this wasn't because she was lonely or desperate. Wanted to know that she had thought about him before she made any rash decisions on their behalf. He didn't know how much she thought of him.

"Okay," she nodded, smiling a little.

They began to eat, then, unlit candles and lilies between them on the table. Spaghetti sauce splattered the tablecloth; there was no sound save the clinking of their forks against their dishes, but their hands continued to hold each other, casually and as if it were the most natural thing in the world.

Both of them silently wondered if the other remembered that they had done the same thing, hold hands like this during dinner, on the night that they both realized they'd fallen in love with each other.


	20. Family

Hey everyone! So this is the last official chapter, but I'll follow it up with an epilogue in a few days, and tie up all the loose ends. I really appreciate everyone who has stuck with this story, and everyone who has reviewed.

Thanks to tadsgirl, who helped me with this chapter! You're such a great inspiration!

* * *

_And what you've been up there searching for forever  
Is in your hands  
When you figure out love is all that matters after all  
It sure makes everything else seem so small_

"So Small"- Carrie Underwood

* * *

The pain started low in her abdomen, and it felt like a thousand knives ripping through her skin. It woke her with a start, and she cried out, the pitch of her voice high and shrill, as her fingers moved quickly to the place at the bottom of her belly, her fingers splaying almost protectively over the skin. She sat upright quickly, the blankets still resting over her legs before she kicked them away, pushing her back against the headboard and groaning loudly, fresh tears suddenly burning her eyes as a new wave of sharp pain hit her.

"Oh my God," she sobbed the words almost incoherently, sucking in a deep breath and gritting her teeth, clenching her fingers into tight fists and holding them protectively to her stomach. "Ow…" the word came out as a muffled whisper, and she squeezed her eyes shut, whimpering still.

This was not right. Not once in all the doctor appointments she'd been to in the last few months had she been told that sharp, stabbing pains in her abdomen were healthy or normal. She could not remember any moment in which the doctor had told her that the feeling of her abdomen being torn in half was a natural occurrence at any stage of pregnancy.

"Corny," her call for him began as a soft whine in the back of her throat, growing progressively louder as she shifted in the bed. She worked her legs off the side of the bed, her feet pressing against the carpet for only a moment before she realized that she could not stand up. The pain had began to move through her legs, down to her feet, and she cried out again softly, literally frozen in place by the discomfort.

"Corny!" She called for him again, her voice now loud and unapologetic, not caring if she woke him and Sophie up. She was beyond selflessness now and curled her fingers around the sheets of the bed, pulling them around her as hot tears began to penetrate the barriers of her eyes.

If she hadn't been so caught up in her own pain, she would have heard the commotion from Corny's room as he stumbled out of bed, managed to trip over the rest of the furniture in the room before he fumbled for the door handle. Because of her own cries, however, she didn't hear him until he was actually _in_ the room with her, his sleep-filled but suddenly frantic voice calling for her, his hands reaching out for her.

"Amber! Amber, what's wrong?" It didn't, of course, take a scientist to diagnose the problem as the young blonde woman lay writhing on the bed, her arms encircling her stomach as she moaned helplessly. "Amber?" His voice broke suddenly, and he caught her by the arms, holding her gently, "Tell me what's happening."

"My stomach," she gasped the words, tears beginning to stain her cheeks in the darkness of the bedroom, "My, God, Corny, it hurts so bad."

He stood, panicked for a moment, before allowing his arms to slip under hers, lifting her out of the bed and helping her across the room hurriedly.

"Okay, Amber," she knew that tone of his voice; he was trying his best not to let her know that he had already begun to panic, but she knew him better than that. "Okay, listen. I'm gonna get you out to the car, and I'm going to drive you to the hospital, all right? It's going to be okay. We just need to get to the hospital."

She nodded, still whimpering, but forcing herself to move with him.

"Sophie!" He called for her as they entered the hallway, his hands still supporting Amber, "Sophie, baby, come on, get up! We have to go!"

The child emerged in the hallway a moment later, still in her nightgown, her dark hair disheveled, her eyes blinking in disorientation.

"Daddy? What's wrong?"

"Amber," he answered her quickly, "It's Amber, she's not feeling well and we need to get to the hospital. Come on, Soph, we need to hurry."

Sophie studied them with wide, confused eyes, but there was no more time to ask questions, and she rushed in front of them, barely taking the time to slip her tiny feet into a pair of sneakers before holding the front door open for them to hurry out.

She scurried into the backseat of the car and Corny helped Amber lower herself into the seat, the pains still shooting through her as he rushed to his side of the vehicle, slamming the door and peeling out of the driveway with such speed that the tires squealed against the ground.

There was silence between them for a moment, save the soft, quiet whimpering that came from Amber, and Sophie leaned up, hooking her arms around part of the front seat, looking worriedly at the woman.

"Amber, is the baby okay?" Her voice was tiny and soft, and Amber groaned suddenly, squeezing her eyes shut and pressing the back of her head against the seat.

"I don't know," she managed to choke out the words, and shuddered with the pain suddenly, her breaths coming in short, sudden gasps.

"Is it being born?" Sophie asked worriedly, glancing between her and Corny, "Is it being born right now?"

"No, Sophie, it's not ready to be born yet. Just sit back and be quiet, please," Corny interrupted their conversation, shooting her a nervous glance in the rearview mirror. Sophie slumped back against the seat, her eyes still watching Amber nervously.

By the time they arrived at the hospital and into the emergency room, they whisked Amber away, and Corny had no choice but to stay behind with Sophie. Meanwhile, Amber found herself in a blur of white; white rooms, white coats, white beds. She forced herself to close her eyes through it all, riding out the stabbing pains in her abdomen, but in her heart, knowing that this was it; something was seriously wrong with her baby.

After what felt like hours, the pains began to subside. Suddenly, and without warning, they had gone completely, and the frenzy of doctors and nurses began to trickle out of the room. At one point, when the pain had completely dissipated and there was only one doctor left in the room with her, she let herself begin to calm down; she began to listen to his words.

Braxton Hicks contractions, he told her, were what she had been experiencing. It was merely false labor, not the actual thing, and it wasn't extremely unusual for expectant mothers. They could be brought on by dehydration, activity, and a number of other factors, and she had nothing to be worried about.

She had nearly laughed when he'd said those words; nothing to worry about. Tell that to her rapidly spasming uterus, or the deep, shooting pains that had kept her paralyzed in bed. The doctor allowed her to rest for a few moments, and explained to her that he would let her "husband and daughter in the waiting room" know that she was going to be just fine.

She found herself walking out to meet them not long after, and Corny and Sophie rushed to her side. Even without thinking, he caught her in a hug, holding her as close to him as her swollen belly would allow, and stroking his fingers through her tangled blonde hair, his mouth next to her ear, whispering sweet, soft prayers.

"Oh, thank God," he said when he finally pulled away, much to a stricken Amber's chagrin. "You're fine, then?" His fingers traced up her arm, instinctively over her stomach, "Everything's okay?"

She couldn't stop turning his words over in her head on the way home. _Was_ everything okay? Sure, she and the baby were fine, but something was not. A part of her was still missing, even with the baby still safe inside of her.

He helped her into the house and into her bed, giving her gentle instructions for a nap before closing the door quietly behind him. She let herself rest against the pillows for what seemed like hours, then sat up slowly and consciously in bed. She glanced around her, taking in her rumpled sheets, her clothes in the closet, her vanity, her make-up, her perfumes, and realized suddenly, and for the first time in her life, that she didn't want _her_ things. She wanted _their_ things. She wanted _their_ sheets on their bed, their clothes in their closet, their records, their dishes, their shoes all lined up beside each other on the floor.

And at that moment, she knew she could wait no longer to take her chances with it. She had been alone for so long, before Corny, and now since their break-up. She needed to know _right now_ if he ever planned on taking her back, because if not, she needed to get away.

She made her way out of the bedroom and into the living room, but neither Corny nor Sophie were on the couch. She checked his bedroom, followed by the kitchen, then the dining room, but there was no sign of either of them. Suddenly, she heard voices from the backyard and pushed her way through the house, and then through the back door and to the porch overlooking the small, green, fenced-in area behind the house. Sophie was running in the grass, giggling against the backdrop of the setting sun. Corny sat watching her from his place in a chair on the porch, his silhouette outlined perfectly in the shadows.

For a moment, he didn't hear her join them, but as she allowed the screen door to shut, he turned, looking at her and smiling unexpectedly.

"Hey. Is everything all right? Are you feeling okay?"

She could do little more than nod as she lowered herself into a chair beside him, her fingers curling into her lap as they watched Sophie silently for a moment.

"I should hate Link," she said the words quietly and honestly, and she felt him tense beside her at the mention of the other man's name. Still, it needed to be said. "You know? I mean, I really should. He came in here, and he ruined everything we had."

Corny made no reply beside her, and she shifted suddenly, blinking against the sunset.

"But I don't hate him."

Corny turned to look at her finally, with these words, his jaw clenched.

"Amber," he cleared his throat, "I don't-"

"I don't hate him because, yes, he did all of those things, but he also did something else." She interrupted him before he had the chance to finish his thought, and she allowed her hand to creep into the space between them, slipping over Corny's hand without warning, "He made me realize how much I _love_ everything that you and I had, Corny."

He blinked twice, then, and she knew that she had taken him by surprise. Good. That was what she'd been going for. He was silent for a moment, and then turned his palm over, his fingertips brushing against hers without ever turning to look at her.

Amber sat silently, reeling in the words she had just said, and then let out a deep sigh of longing.

"I love you, still," she told him quietly, finally letting her blue eyes rise to meet his. "I always have, Corny. I always will."

She watched him for a moment, then cleared her throat again.

"But I need you to tell me," she confessed to him quietly, in the shadows of the evening, "I need you to tell me if you can love me again."

"I couldn't love her any more than I already do," he said suddenly, his voice soft and low. Amber glanced at him curiously, her lips parting slightly, her eyes brushing over the sight of their hands resting together.

"What?" She genuinely hadn't heard him, and her eyes went across the yard. Sophie had stopped playing, and was watching them silently from a few yards away, her dark hair blowing in the breeze of late summer.

"I know you heard her question. That day, after Link left for the last time. You told me I had my job back, and you went into your room to nap." He smiled reminiscently, "Sophie asked me if I loved you more, since I had my job back. She was being so loud, and I just assumed you had heard her. Anyway, she asked, and that was what I told her. I said, 'I couldn't love her any more than I already do'."

Amber bit on her lip, watching his face.

"I want to marry you," she told him quickly, her face flushing, and he moved to look at her, his eyes watching her. "I always have, I was just horribly confused, Corny. I was an idiot, and I didn't realize that the entire time we were together, I was searching for what I already had, with you." She watched him nervously. "I'm ready," she nodded after a moment, "I am ready to be with you forever, if you'll have me. Will you?"

Corny sat quietly beside her, and Sophie began to approach them on the porch, her hand tracing up the railing as she climbed the stairs. Corny patted his lap and she neared him, slipping effortlessly onto his leg. His arms went around her stomach and he cuddled her.

"I don't know," he said after a moment, and Sophie looked curiously at him. "See, Amber, the problem is…" he hesitated, and Amber's heart began to pound. She felt the corners of her mouth turning into a frown, and he sighed. "The problem is, I can't really _have_ you again, because you've never really _left_ me. You've always been right here," he worked a hand over his heart, patted it twice, then slipped Sophie's hand up to her own heart, "and right here."

Amber felt her face flush, and he leaned up a little to look at Sophie.

"Right?" He asked gently, and the child nodded in response.

"Right." She gave him a crooked smile, then looked at Amber, her fingers hesitantly reaching out to stroke her swollen belly softly. "And right here, remember? This is my family."

"That's right, it is," Corny agreed softly, resting his chin against the top of her head for a moment before looking at Amber.

"My family," Amber nodded, knowing at that moment that she had made yet another mistake. She smiled slightly, then shook her head.

"No, not my family. _Our_ family."


End file.
